A Regular For The Regular

, , | Right | October 27, 2018

(I am in the middle of a very long shift on a busy weekend. I see a regular customer approach and greet her.)

Me: “Hello, ma’am! What can I get for you?”

Customer: “I want a [drink], please, regular size.”

Me: “Okay, but what size did you want exactly? We have the medium and the small size.”

(I only ask this because many people say regular for both medium and small, and I want to get her order right.)

Customer: *stares at me* “I want a regular size.”

Me: “Okay, but when some people say regular, they could mean either of the two sizes.”

Customer: *still refuses to say a certain size and points at the medium cup, talking to me in a teaching and demeaning tone* “When people say regular, it’s always this size cup, okay?”

Me: “Okay.”

(I took her order and quickly made her drinks to get her out as quickly as possible. That, to be honest, prevented me from being cheery and light to the other customers. Just so you know, ma’am, several months ago our medium size was called a large, and our small cups were called a regular. Older customers get confused by the cup size change to this day. I’m sorry that you had to teach me about our own names for cups for trying to make sure I got the right size you wanted.)

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You Can Pay For The Rest If It Makes Cents

, , , , | Right | October 25, 2018

(I am working alone at the front of a juice bar. My coworker is in the back stocking up on ingredients when a young couple comes up to order one drink.)

Me: “That’s going to be $4.58, please.”

(The guy starts going through his wallet. He clearly has a few $1, $5, and $10 bills, but looks through his pockets for change. He only has a few pennies and dimes.)

Guy: *to girlfriend* “Do you have any change?”

(The girl starts looking through her wallet and comes up with none. She clearly has lots of $1, $10, and $20 bills.)

Girl: “No, sweetie. I don’t.”

Guy: *to me* “Is there any way you can pay for the coins?” *points at my tip jar*

Me: “No, I can’t do that, sir.”

(The guy and girl both beg for a few seconds and I continue to deny their request.)

Girl: *huffs and pulls out a dollar bill and tosses it at me* “All right, b****. Here’s the money.”

(I make an exasperated face and complete the transaction. I try to hand the boyfriend his change when the girlfriend speaks up.)

Girl: “Let this b**** have the change. She clearly wants to hog it all, anyway.”

(I ignore her and hand the boyfriend his change and make his order. I usually make drinks really quickly, and this case is no exception. There is also a huge line, so it’s only natural of me to speed it up. In the middle of blending together the ordered drink, the guy approaches me.)

Guy: “I’m sorry about my girlfriend’s behavior. Can you not make my drink taste bad?”

(I stare at him a while and then reassure him that I would do no such thing. I also explain to him why I couldn’t help them pay for their own drink; I’m not allowed to even if I want to, and I also have to split the tip with my coworker. I then quickly hand him his drink and try to help the next customer when the girl approaches me again.)

Girl: “Listen here, b****. I want you to know—”

(The boyfriend cut her off and explained to her that I couldn’t pay for the drinks because of my coworker. NOT because they were completely capable of paying themselves, NOT because it’s wrong to put someone down because they aren’t paying for their things, but because I had to SPLIT my tip. The addition of them assuming that I would stoop low enough to sabotage their drink ruined my entire day.)

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Service Not Worth Talking About

| Working | July 22, 2016

(I just got back from the hospital where the doctors told me I likely had strep throat. Because of this, my throat hurts and I am having a difficult time talking. I decide to get myself a smoothie to soothe my throat. I walk into to juice shop and knock on the counter)

Worker: *looking down at the register* “What can I get for you today?”

(I rap the counter again and tried to draw the attention to the fact that I can’t speak. At this point, a man walks in and gets in line behind me.)

Worker: “What?!” *still looking down at the register*

(Feeling very silly now, I knock the counter a third time and am waving my hand in front of her, but still she won’t look up.)

Worker: “Would you hurry up and order?! I don’t have all day!”

Man Behind Me: “Excuse me, miss, but if you would bother to look, you would realize this man can’t speak.”

(The woman looked up quickly to see me pantomiming in front of her and turned beet red. In her flustered state, her phone flew out of her hand and we could see she had been playing Angry Birds the entire time.)

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