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An Employer Who Pales In Comparison To Decent Ones

, , , , | Working | April 23, 2020

(I’m applying for a job at a tanning salon via an external agency, from which I have an assigned job coach. I have to say, I’m not exactly the beauty-guru type, and working at a salon was a questionable option for me from the start, but my job coach keeps telling me I’m perfect for the job.)

Job Coach: “It’s only a hostess type of function anyway. You know, welcome the customers, point them to their tanning booths, and make coffee.” 

(The job coach is there for the interview and we both arrive at the same time. The employer lets us in, but we are followed by a man who I think is another employee. Once the employer gets us set with coffee and tea and he strikes up a conversation with the man… which takes him about 20 minutes.)

Employer: *to the man* “Did you see the state of our windows? They really need some cleaning. I guess I’ll have those broads who work the desk here do that this week. All they do is sit on their a**es anyway.” 

(Finally, just when my job coach and I wonder if this is a job interview or a tea party, the employer says goodbye to the man he was talking to — a friend of his, as it turns out — and directs his attention to us. 

He describes a bit of the job and I’m mildly interested. It all sounds like something I could do. Then, my job coach asks him about the controversy surrounding tanning, and how you can get skin cancer from it. Cue a long tirade from the employer on how tanning is very healthy and it’s actually sunblock that causes cancer, followed by an equally long tirade on how big pharma is a conspiracy, global warming isn’t real, and vaccines cause autism, expecting us to agree with him at every point. 

The conversation finally ends and I’m expected to tag along for a day or two to see if this job is a match. I’m too baffled to counteract anything, and I let it happen, but once my job coach and I leave the shop, I express my concerns.)

Job Coach: “So, what do you think? Do you want to give it a shot? It could be a fun job!”

Me: “With all due respect… I don’t think I want to work for an employer who refers to his female employees as ‘those broads,’ displays a very unprofessional demeanor by yapping with his ‘friend’ for twenty minutes, and has so many wrong views on the world that I can only foresee a lot of arguing if I ever were to work for him. So… thanks but no thanks.”

How An Interviewer Fails An Interview

, , , , , , | Working | April 9, 2020

I am currently searching for a job. I currently work full-time, so I need a bit of notice when it comes to interviews.

One day, I come back from lunch and sit at my desk. My mobile phone has been ringing continuously and it’s all from the same local number.

Calling back, I’m greeted by an irate and rude man telling me there is no way that I will ever work for his company! How dare I?!

As soon as he stops shouting, I ask him what his problem is. He quickly tells me that I missed a job interview that afternoon. I search my call history and email and inform him that this is the first time I am hearing from him. I have never even been invited to an interview.

Suddenly, the man goes sheepish as he realises what has happened.

It transpires that he had organised an interview and had spoken to HR, the team, and everyone in his company. However, he had neglected to actually tell me about the interview.

He then tried to rearrange an interview… after shouting at me and calling me a b****. I said no.

I’d say I dodged a bullet there.

A Not-So-Crafty Applicant

, , , , , | Working | April 8, 2020

(I’m helping with some interviews for a craft store, as I’m a new manager. I am asked to interview a girl in her twenties, just a couple of years younger than me. I go through her application and it looks normal: some retail experience, finished high school, computer proficient. I call her to set up the interview.)

Me: “Hi, is this [Applicant]?”

Applicant: “Yeah. What’s up?”

Me: “This is [My Name] with [Store], calling about your application. We’d like to have you come in for an interview!”

Applicant: “Oh, cool. Can we do it at [Coffee Shop]? I don’t wanna come all the way out there.” 

Me: “Unfortunately, we have all interviews done in the store. I can see if it can be done on a day you’re more open, though!”

Applicant: “Ugh, I guess.”

(We get it scheduled, and I tell her goodbye and hang up. I look at the other manager in the office with me.)

Me: “If driving to the store is such a hassle just for the interview, how is she gonna manage driving here to work when she’s scheduled?”

Manager: “Yeah, I’ve seen that.”

(Later on, she comes in for her interview. She’s dressed somewhat professionally but looks annoyed the entire time. I bring her back to one of our classrooms to do the interview so it’s out of the way.)

Me: “So, do you do any crafts?”

Applicant: “Ew, no. I just go on Etsy a lot.” 

Me: “All right, do you know a lot about any of the crafts?” 

Applicant: “Nope. Don’t care to learn; I finished school and that’ll be it for learning.” 

(I’ve already made my decision about hiring her, but I decide to finish out the interview as a courtesy. The rest of her answers are about the same: she doesn’t seem interested in helping customers, doesn’t care to do overnights to stock, and doesn’t want to work the register. We wrap things up, and I let her know we’ll call her.)

Applicant: “Okay. So, do I do my new paperwork stuff tomorrow?”

Me: “We have work on our end that needs to be done first, which can take a bit. Like I said, we’ll call you.”

Applicant: “Ugh, okay.”

(As I come back into the office, I apparently look exhausted, because the other manager looks concerned.)

Manager: “Bad interview?”

Me: “She doesn’t craft, doesn’t know anything about crafting, and doesn’t want to learn. She says if a customer is rude, she’ll just tell them to leave. And that if they need help, they can just Google it. How has she worked retail like this?!”

Manager: “Probably either lied or has a family member in management. At least you don’t have to try to train her.” 

(She called back weeks later to ask when she should come in. The other manager had the pleasure of telling her we went with someone else.)

A Rather Queer Interview Technique

, , , , , , , | Working | December 4, 2019

(I’ve just started a new job for a company that represents various progressive non-profit groups. The two clients our office oversees are an environmental organization and an LGBT organization. Although I’ve had other positions where I’ve overseen staff before, I need to be trained on how the company conducts interviews by a coworker who has been there for a while. The coworker training me during this interview happens to be a lesbian. We have just finished basic work history questions with this applicant.)

Coworker: “We are currently working on behalf of [Environmental Organization] and [LGBT Organization]. We have enough openings right now to assign you to your preferred group but may need you to work with the other if the need arises.”

Applicant: “Well, I’d love to work on [Environmental Organization]. I’m not all that cool with that queer stuff.”

Coworker: “Well…”

Applicant: “It’s like, no one made them be gay; that was their decision, which is fine and all, but that doesn’t mean you get special rights, you know?”

Coworker: “Um…”

Applicant: “They think they deserve to marry each other and all, but like, if I get married that makes my marriage mean less, you know? Plus, if they really want benefits so bad or whatever, then a queer guy should just marry, like, a queer chick or something, right?”

(I notice my coworker is biting her lip, ready to go off on the guy, so I step in.)

Me: “Well, that’s all the questions I think we have. We will be in touch if we decide to bring you on.”

Applicant: “Great! I really look forward to working here. This place seems great!”

(My coworker thanked me afterward for stepping in at that point as she likely couldn’t have handled it professionally. How that guy still seemed to think he was going to get hired was beyond either of us.)

This story is part of the Bad Interviews roundup!

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You’re Un-Work-For-able

, , , , , | Working | October 31, 2019

(I am 29 years old and I’m looking for a new job after being laid off from my previous job. I apply at several places, but because I do not have my driver’s license yet, I try to keep it to businesses close enough for me to walk to. The first of them to call me for an interview is a bar in the next town over, just barely within walking distance. At the end of the interview…)

Owner: “Well, then, I’d like to offer you a job, [My Name].”

Me: “Really?”

Owner:H*** no! I honestly can’t believe I wasted my time interviewing you. I mean seriously, almost thirty and you don’t have your d*** driver’s license? F****** loser! And your only experience is pushing carts and bagging groceries at [Nearby Grocery Store], and a little bit of construction experience? Puh-lease! You’re worthless! I mean, just look at you. Not even dressed nicely!” *points to my outfit, which consists of a nice polo and black pants* “And you just half-a**ed all of my questions! You’re literally unhireable! I’m f****** serious, you will never get a job anywhere with interview skills and a resume like this! GET OUT OF MY BAR, YOU WORTHLESS PIECE OF S***! OUT! NOW!”

(I quickly made my way out of his office and over to the door. He came out after me and continued to shout insults in my direction as I walked away, and customers were watching the entire time. I was on the verge of crying but I pulled myself together and made a promise to myself to prove that loon wrong. As soon as I got home, I began putting out applications to just about every business in the area, h***-bent on getting myself a job. Within a couple of weeks, I had an interview for a shelf stocker position at a different grocery store just up the street from my house. Sure enough, I was hired pretty much on the spot. A few months later, I was driving past the bar on the way home from the DMV after getting my license, and I noticed that it was boarded up and appeared to have not been open for some time. I soon learned why from a friend who used to work there; the bar owner had pretty much shot himself in the foot the day that he interviewed me. More than half his staff, including the cook and both of his managers, quit immediately after they saw what he did to me. He then fired the remainder of his staff out of frustration the next day, and shut down a week later because he couldn’t find any replacements. Gee, I wonder why?)