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Oil Have To Disagree With You There

, , | Right | December 16, 2021

I am trying to fix a watch but I need to oil it as it is too rusty. I explain this to the customer when they come in to collect it.

Customer: “You put moisture in my watch! You caused the rust!”

Me: “It was oil. Oil is not water. Oil doesn’t cause RUST. Perhaps don’t shower with your watch on.”

Their Deduction Skills Are Broken

, , | Right | December 13, 2021

A customer hands me their watch.

Customer: “It’s broken.”

Me: “Repairs start at [rate].”

Customer: “No. You’re the one who broke it.”

Me: “I couldn’t have broken it, sir.”

Customer: “How do you know that?!”

Me: “Because I’ve only had it for thirty seconds and you’ve been staring at me the whole time.”

Little Monsters Are Usually Raised By Bigger Ones

, , , , , , | Right | July 21, 2021

I work in a local jewelry shop and a mother approaches the counter with three small kids in tow. Our jewelry counter has an opening in the middle where our sales computer is. The mother is taking her time inspecting every piece of jewelry while her children are running wild, screaming and crying and wrestling with each other, and banging on our glass cases.

Me: “Excuse me, guys. You can’t wrestle in here. You could get very hurt.”

The small children get very shy and start to calm down. Mom at this point has finally selected the pieces she would like to put into layaway and I start explaining the process to her. I suddenly hear something fall over and it looks like one of the kids knocked over one of our displays. Thankfully, it was plastic but they still could get very hurt. I look at the mom and, of course, she isn’t watching her “things.”

Mom: *Texting on her phone* “Stop, guys.”

Me: “Ma’am, they could get very hurt. Could you please watch them just a bit closer? The display nearly fell on them.”

Mom: “Yeah, okay, sure. Just hurry up. I have somewhere to be at two.”

Clearly, she doesn’t care nor is she interested in the fact that her children are being little monsters. I’m trying my best to hold back my eye-roll and go to grab her paperwork. All I do is walk to the opposite end of the store where the printer is, and when I come back, the children are now behind the counter, banging on the cases, trying to open the doors to the jewelry, and throwing our smaller displays for rings and necklaces around. I’m in awe that this woman hasn’t even looked up from her phone to acknowledge the fact her kids are behind the counter.

Me: “You guys can’t be back here! Please go back around! Stop throwing those; they aren’t yours!”

Mom: “Don’t yell at my kids! I’ll have you know I chose to spend my money here and not at [Competitor], and they don’t yell at my kids! This is ridiculous! They probably wouldn’t be bored had you hurried up! We could be out of here by now!”

Me: “They can’t be back here trying to open our cases and destroying our property. They had already knocked down a display and I asked you to please watch them.”

Mom: “I want your manager, and I want compensation for the potential injury that could have happened to my children!”

I run to the back to grab my manager, who is also the owner, and explain the situation. She informs me that she has been watching behind the two-way mirror.

Owner: “Ma’am, I cannot allow this sale to happen. I have heard you just as well as seen you yell at my employee instead of at your rambunctious children. I have watched your children knock over our items and run behind the counter. I would like you to please exit our store.”

She walked out the door, leaving her children still in the store. She ended up coming back in and screaming for her kids to “get in the f****** car.” I’ve haven’t seen her or her kids again.

Not In Receipt Of Understanding

, , , , | Right | September 22, 2020

I live in an area that is home to a lot of different nationalities, so not everybody speaks the language that well. This is just a student job and we are not allowed to do everything.

A woman comes up and buys a bunch of things, including a pair of expensive earrings in black. Near closing time, she comes back with those earrings.

Me: “Hello, how may I help you?”

Customer: *In very broken Dutch* “I bought these earrings here today and I would like to exchange them for the red pair.”

Me: “Okay, do you have your receipt?”

Customer: “No, but I just want the red pair instead of the black pair.”

Me: “Yes, but I need the receipt for that.”

Customer: “But I just want the red pair instead of the black pair.”

Me: “Yes, madam, I understand, but I need the receipt for that.”

Customer: “But it’s the same pair, just another color!”

She is getting mad and there is a line forming behind her.

Me: “Yes, madam, and again, like I said, I need the receipt. I need to scan the items in again because the codes on the back are different according to color.”

Customer: “But I just want to exchange it for the red pair.”

Me: “Yes, madam, I understand, but again, I need the receipt for that.”

Customer: “But I’ve been here this morning!”

Me: “Yes, madam, I know; I helped you this morning, too. But without the receipt, I cannot exchange the items.”

Customer: “But I don’t have the receipt anymore!”

Me: “Well, madam, that is too bad, but without the receipt, I am not allowed to exchange it.”

Customer: “But it’s the same pair, just another color!”

This kept going on for around fifteen minutes. I started getting annoyed and told her to go and take the earrings to my coworker, who is a full-time employee. After serving the other customers, I heard angry voices from the back of the store. After a while, the woman walked out of the store, gave me a nasty look, and left without the earrings.

An Exquisite Exercise In Patience

, , , | Right | July 8, 2020

I work on an American cruise ship selling very high-end jewellery up to around $300,000. I am English.

It is a full day at sea and two elderly women come into my store and start looking at the jewellery. I make small talk with them about their day and cruise and ask them if they want to see some of the jewellery.

Guest #1: “Oh, yes, we would love to look at the jew-ell-ery.”

They sound excited at this prospect. I get out a necklace and put it on [Guest #1].

Guest #2: “So, tell us about this jew-ell-ery.”

I proceed to tell them where it is made, who it is by, etc. They keep asking more and more questions, like the gold, the weight, the carat, etc. Then, they start to look at other collections, too, to which I oblige. 

They do this every day for about four days — without ever buying anything. I am getting a little frustrated as they seem really happy, and they smile at each other a lot and seem really keen, even repeating me to make sure they understand what I am saying.

It isn’t until I am on my break and overhear them on the way to my cabin:

Guest #1: “She can’t really be English; I am sure she is South African, maybe Australian. Do the English even say ‘exquisite’? Isn’t that French?! I bet that’s French. Maybe she is French! Just listen to her next time. I think I will pretend to buy pearls tomorrow and see if she says it again! I don’t care where she is from; I just love her accent! It is adorable! I don’t understand her, but I do like to listen to her talk! She sounds so funny!”

They did indeed come in the next day and ask to look at the pearls. They still never bought anything… and still asked me lots of questions about every piece.