I am the author of this story about my mum.

Brother: “Mum, it’s not fair that you have my laptop. It’s mine. I need it.”

Mum: “I paid to fix it, so it’s mine now.”

This goes back and forth for some time.

Me: *To my mother* “So, I’m going to be moving out this month, and seeing as I paid to replace the oven when it broke, does that mean it’s my oven and I get to take it with me when I leave?”

The amount of steam blowing out of my mother’s ears is enough to power a small train. Accusations of filial impiety are hurled, nostrils are flared, and there is much shouting and yelling and stomping about. But when the dust finally settles, my brother does get his laptop back, and we think that’s the end of it.

Later that evening, my dad, my brother, my husband, and I are all sitting in the living room when my mum waltzes in.

Mum: “So, [My Name], you want your money back that bad? Here.”

She puts $1,000 cash on the coffee table.

Mum: “That’s what you paid for the oven, isn’t it? Have it all back. I won’t have you suggesting that I owe you either the money or the oven.”

Me: “Er, no, I never wanted the money back. I was just trying to make a point that you owed [Brother] his laptop back because, at the end of the day, it was still his laptop, even if you fixed it. Just like that oven is yours even though I paid to fix it!”

Mum: “No, you think I took your money and won’t give it back to you! So now I’m giving it back to you!”

Me: *Facepalm* “Oh, my God, this is ridiculous. You are ridiculous.”

Brother: *Barely suppressing his laughter* “Mum, you’re missing the point entirely.”

Dad: *Patiently* “[Mum], [My Name] was just trying to give you an example. She agrees that that money is your money; she was just trying to show that by the same logic, [Brother]’s laptop belongs to him. She was just making a point.”

Mum: *Snidely* “Oh, no, I understand her point completely. I’m giving the money back. Now you can no longer accuse me of anything. It’s finished.”

Everyone starts talking at the same time.

Brother: “Mum, you don’t get it—”

Husband: “You don’t understand; she wasn’t asking for any money—”

Dad: “It was just an analogy—”

Me: “I don’t want it! Take it back!”

My mum throws her hands in the air and walks out, leaving the cash on the table.

Dad speaks after her and trails off.

Dad: “It… was just… analogy…” *Looks at me* “She doesn’t understand what an analogy is, does she?”

Me: “Nope.”

All four of us stare at the money on the table.

Brother: *Clears throat* “Well, [My Name], what’s it gonna be? Your pride, or $1,000?”

Me: *Crossing my arms* “Obviously my pride.”

Dad: “You should just take the money. Might as well.”

Me: “Can’t. I’d lose my moral high ground.” *Smirks*

Brother: *Teasingly* “It’s calling to you… It’s saying, ‘[My Name]… pick me up…’”

Dad: *Sighs* “I’m going to bed. Good night.”

He leaves. My brother stretches and makes a show of getting up off the couch.

Brother: “Welllll, I mean, if nobody wants it…”

Husband: “F*** that.” *Swipes the cash off the table* “I don’t give a s*** about moral high ground. This is payback for that time she talked smack when my brother was in hospital.”

Brother: “There you go.”

We moved out the week after, and the money ended up going toward our first month’s rent.

Related:
Some People Get Hospitalized For Saying Things Like That

I’ve been working at the same hardware retail store for three years in customer service. In our store, our return policy is that you must bring the item back within ninety days unopened and unused to get a full refund. Otherwise, it will be an exchange. Simply, if we can resell it, the customer can get their money back.

Me: “Hi there! How can I help you today?”

Customer: “I want to return this.”

He passes me his clearly used item and a receipt for the same company but another brand.

Me: “Okay, so our return store policy is ninety days unopened, unused. I will just have to exchange this for you.”

Customer: “No, it’s defective. I want my full refund.”

Me: “Unfortunately, I am unable to as it was opened and used. I can only do an exchange.”

Customer: “No, give me a store credit, then!”

By this point, he is getting the attention of other customers and I really don’t want to make a scene.

Me: “Let me call a manager to discuss this with her and I may be able to give another option.”

I call my manager and she wants to see it herself. She comes up to examine the product and receipt as the man is blabbering about how horrible the product is.

Manager: “Like [My Name] said, we can only provide you an exchange, sir.”

Customer: “This is ridiculous! I’ve returned defective items here before without an issue!”

He is now shouting and gathering the attention of our long line of customers.

Manager: “How long ago was that?”

Customer: “I don’t know! A year ago.”

Manager: *Points to a sign on the counter* “Our policy clearly states—”

Customer: “I don’t care! It’s defective! Give me my refund!”

My manager has had a long day; she is exhausted and is clearly not up for arguing.

Manager: “Okay, we will give you a refund. But for future reference, we will not make this exception again.”

Customer: “About time!”

My manager leaves as I process the refund. The customer begins telling me how ridiculous our refund policy is.

Me: “Okay. If you want to insert or tap your card, you will be getting $21.00 back on it.”

Two male customers are walking out at this point and they clearly have heard the whole conversation.

Customer #2: “Excuse me?!”

He shouts from the exit to me and I look over, prepared to get yelled at again. The other customer holds up the toilet paper he just bought.

Customer #2: “If I use this, can I get a refund?”

Everyone who heard the interaction, including customers, employees, and managers, began laughing. I tried to hide my laughter the best as I could.

The man rolled his eyes, sarcastically laughing, before taking his receipt to leave.

It was definitely the highlight of my day.

Related:
Refunder Blunder, Part 58
Refunder Blunder, Part 57
Refunder Blunder, Part 56
Refunder Blunder, Part 55
Refunder Blunder, Part 54

Due to a number of health complications, on top of long-term injuries from a car accident from over a decade ago, my mom is on a sizable regimen of medications. She sees a doctor every month to keep on top of her pain management and to make sure some of her conditions aren’t deteriorating.

When Mom gets out of her appointment, she says the doctor has sent in a refill to our pharmacy so we can pick it up in half an hour. Mom and I go to get lunch and then go to pick up her prescriptions.

The person at the counter then hits us with this:

Pharmacy Tech: “We refilled one of your prescriptions but not the second one. Since they are the same, we’re still deciding whether or not you need it.”

Mom: “They’re not exactly the same, actually. One is immediate release at a lower dose; the other is long-term release at a slightly higher dose. I just had an appointment with my doctor.”

Pharmacy Tech: “Well, if we decide you need both, we’ll fill the second one.”

Mom: “What do you mean, ‘if’?! Are you telling me that you will override my doctor’s decision regarding my personal healthcare?!”

Pharmacy Tech: “We’re just deciding whether or not you really need both.”

Mom: “That’s my doctor’s decision, actually. You know, the one with a medical degree and a contract with me to handle my personal healthcare? The prescription is valid. Please just fill it.”

The pharmacy tech taps a button on the computer in front of him and then shrugs.

Pharmacy Tech: “Okay, so, apparently, you only need one of these, so you will only be picking up one today.”

Mom: “I think I’m going to talk to my doctor about that.”

Pharmacy Tech: *A little smugly* “You do whatever you feel is necessary, ma’am.”

Mom called her doctor and talked with him about our situation. She was told to hang tight and it would be taken care of.

Apparently, the doctor called and chewed the pharmacy tech up one side and down the other for overriding his medical decisions, because thirty minutes later, Mom got both of her meds. The pharmacy tech wouldn’t look Mom in the eye for the rest of our visit.

On one hand, I could understand a phone call to double-check for possible mistakes or misunderstandings. Doctor handwriting is notoriously terrible, after all. On the other, simply deciding that one medication is not necessary, in direct contradiction to a doctor, is a good way to lose your job.

I used to work for a company that sold tires online. Had one customer purchase a set of All-Terrain tires because they were significantly cheaper than Mud Tires, which are what he actually needed.

We were not made aware of his needs before his purchase and only found out when he called in to complain:

Customer: “The tires aren’t working very well in the muddy terrain!”

He keeps going on and demanding a refund, and we finally have to draw the line:

Me: “Sir, we can’t take a return on tires you’ve already taken off-roading.”

Customer: “Have you even seen mud? I know y’all are in California and you only have sand out there. Out here in Mississippi, we have REAL MUD.”

Then he hung up and we never heard from him again…

A customer calls in to get an income tax receipt.

Customer: “I shouldn’t have to call to get my income tax receipt!”

Me: “They are available online to save paper if you don’t want to call.”

Customer: “I don’t believe in any of that stuff. I recycle a little, but it can all go to the landfill! The world has gone too far with this environmentalism!”