Troll Booth

, , , , , , | Right | February 10, 2018

(I am working as a server on a Saturday evening. It is rather slow, but it usually picks up from seven until closing. The policy for our restaurant is that booths can only be used to seat parties of three or more, due to the limited seating we have. A woman walks into the restaurant asking to be seated in a booth.)

Host: “Unfortunately, we can only seat parties of three or more in a booth. We have many tables available, as well as the bar.”

Customer: “I’d like to speak to your manager.”

(The manager arrives and asks what the problem is, then explains the policy to the customer.)

Customer: “YOU ARE TREATING ME LIKE A SECOND-CLASS CITIZEN!”

Manager: “Ma’am, I’m sorry you feel that way, but it is policy, and we have many other tables available to you.”

Customer: “WHAT YOU ARE DOING TO ME RIGHT NOW IS COMPARABLE TO A PERSON OF COLOR BEING TOLD TO SIT AT THE BACK OF THE BUS! YOU ARE DISCRIMINATING. I WILL NOT PAY FOR ANY MEAL I EAT HERE!”

(The woman was white. If it had been up to me, I would have asked her to leave, but my manager caved and gave her a booth, much to the ire of the couple who we denied a booth, due to the policy, just moments prior to this woman showing up. And of course, guess who had to serve her?)

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Not Even Remotely Getting Paid

, , , | Working | February 10, 2018

(I’m working at a small town radio station. We have a big event coming up in town, and we’re deciding how to handle it. Some of the radio jargon: a “remote” is when we’re live on location from an event, and “canning the remote” is when we pre-record some or all of our coverage about the event.)

Boss: “Okay, this is a pretty major event, and I want our presence there to be as big as possible. Therefore, I want you to can the remote, so everyone can be at the event, interacting with the crowd.”

(My coworker and I agree. The day comes, so we make our recording about the event at the station, as per the boss’s orders, load up our gear into the station vehicle, and head to the event. We arrive, set up our booth, and get ready to do our thing. When the boss shows up, she looks at us and says:)

Boss: “By the way, you’re not getting paid for this. Because you decided to can this remote so you can all be here screwing around, it no longer counts as a remote.”

(From that day forth, whenever the boss told us to can a remote so, “we can all be there and maximize our presence,” we politely told her, “No.”)

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Giving The Peer Review A Bad Review

, , , , | Learning | February 10, 2018

(I start a college course a year later than people usually do, as I left my previous school and spent six months working in Germany. That, combined with the fact that my birthday is in October, means I am 18 when this happens, and most of the other students in my class are 16 or 17. This happens after we do some peer-marked work and I’ve passed my classmate’s work back to her. I’ve marked her work, and while the information is good, her spelling is terrible, and I’ve corrected the spelling mistakes. I’ve had a lot of problems with this student in the past, so I don’t have a lot of patience for her.)

Classmate: *looks at all the corrections in her work, then looks at me in disgust* “Uh, what is this?”

Me: “Well, you made some mistakes with your spelling, so I corrected those as I went along. Your work itself is really good, though!”

Classmate: “You think you’re so much better than me, don’t you?”

Me: “No? Why would I think that?”

Classmate: “Because you’re older and you worked in Germany! You think you’re smarter than me! You think you’re the smartest person in the room!”

Me: “Darlin’, even if you were alone in this room, you still wouldn’t be the smartest person here.”

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Might Not Run The Store, But They’re Running With It

, , , , , , , , , | Working | February 9, 2018

(Another staff member and I unofficially run our department because the manager who is supposed to run it only ever works at the registers and usually has no interest in anything else. But there is also another staff member who thinks he runs the store. He’s made some of our staff put stock out in a particular way, and had it wrongly priced. I am about to put it right when the store manager comes along.)

Store Manager: “Who did this?”

Me: “[Coworker #1] and [Coworker #2] put it out this way; I’m just about to redo it.”

Store Manager: “Why did you let them do this? You are supposed to be supervising them.”

Me: “I didn’t. I was at lunch. [Coworker #3] told them to do it this way.”

Store Manager: “[Coworker #3]? When will people ever learn he doesn’t run this store?”

(A few days later, the store manager is away, and for the first time, the woman who is supposed to run our section decides she will take an active role in our section — for about five minutes. She has the brought [Coworker #3] with her.)

Department Manager: *looking at stock she has no idea about* “Where is this going?”

Me: “It’s going in the floor stack right here. I have to condense this stock to fit it.” *pointing to other stock* “I’m about to start on it right now.” *I describe how I’ll set it up*

Department Manager: *turns to the other coworker* “Is that okay with you if [My Name] does it that way?”

(Maybe the store manager should have told his second in command that [Coworker #3] doesn’t run the store.)

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Plainly You Are Wrong

, , , , , | Working | February 9, 2018

(I order cheeseburgers with only cheese on them, or “plain.” Since I’ve occasionally run into confusion over using “plain,” I sometimes say, “only cheese.”)

Me: “Could I get a cheeseburger with only cheese on it?”

Waiter: “Sure.”

(He later brings me a cheeseburger on a closed bun with the regular cheeseburger toppings, sauces, and cheese.)

Me: “Sorry, this isn’t what I ordered.”

Waiter: “What? What did you want?”

(I explain that I only want a burger patty with cheese on top of it and a bun.)

Waiter: “Sir, you ordered wrong. You should have asked for a ‘plain cheeseburger.’ People won’t understand you if you don’t use ‘plain.’”

Me: “…”

(This is literally the only time in years of ordering cheeseburgers that “only cheese” didn’t mean “plain.”)

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