Express-Lane Their Opinion

, , , , , | Right | January 26, 2018

(It is 8:00 pm on a normal, quiet Sunday night, and out of the blue, we get extremely busy. I call up all of my available backup cashiers, and proceed to ring up my line as quickly as possible. A customer comes up near the end of the rush and slams the item divider onto the conveyor belt, then places his four small tubes of homeopathic pills behind it. He waits his turn, as there is only one mid-sized order in front of him, I ring him up, and then:)

Customer: “Can I make a suggestion? You need to have your express lane open at all times. It’s just unfair that I have to wait in line while you ring up all of these huge orders. This is all I have. It’s just not right.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir. This time of night, we just don’t have the staffing for that.”

Customer: “Well, you have the staffing for that lane, this lane, and those lanes.”

Me: “Yes, I’ve temporarily called them up from other departments to help out. But I’ll certainly take your suggestion into consideration.”

(My manager is ringing customers up behind me, and I draw his attention to my customer.)

Me: “Sir, this gentleman is suggesting that we keep our express lane open during all business hours. Just passing that along to you.”

Manager: “Sounds good. We’ll work on it.” *he dismissively goes back to serving his customer*

Customer: *in a huffy, irate tone* “I just don’t see why you can’t have it open at all times. It’s just good customer service.”

Me: “Absolutely, sir. I’ve passed your suggestion along to my manager, and we’ll certainly take it into consideration. It’s not a bad idea at all.”

(His continued glares kept me rambling positive affirmations until he took his four tubes of sugar pills and departed. By the time he’d finished his little rant, we were back down to two registers, and the store stayed quiet right up to closing time.)

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What Would Be Wonderful Is You Leaving

, , , , , , | Working | January 26, 2018

I am the customer in this story, my father is at the hospital having open heart surgery while I am at the store getting get-well gifts, and frozen meals for my kids so they can fend for themselves for the evening. I’m checking out at a lane that has both a very happy trainer — she is demonstrating and therefore doing the work — and a trainee observing. I’ve been crying off and on all day and look like a wreck.

As the trainer is checking me out she asks, “And how is your day going, ma’am?”

Distracted, anxious, and barely hearing her, I respond, “Just fine, thank you.”

Then she says, in a very cheerful voice, “Why don’t you tell me the most wonderful thing that happened to you today?

I’d like to think that I would typically be able to answer that question, but with all of the stress, and the absurdity of the question itself, I’m a bit flummoxed. I stare at her for a minute and then say, “Actually, nothing good has happened today. My father is being operated on as we speak, and I am worried and stressed. I apologize for telling you I was fine; it’s actually been a terrible day.”

The trainee is staring at me with wide eyes, looking horrified. Meanwhile the trainer just says perkily, “Well, that’s too bad, but I’m sure something has been wonderful for you today!”

I am literally dumbstruck. Thankfully it is a quick transaction so I just pay and leave without another word.

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I’d Tell Them To Go Suck An Egg, But They Won’t Buy Any

, , , , , , | Right | January 26, 2018

(I’m an assistant manager at a grocery store. It’s around Christmas time, and I’m on the midnight shift. The store is packed, and the lines at the registers are long, even with every lane going. One of the cashiers calls me over to their register because the customer has an “issue” with the price of her eggs. I come over with a smile.)

Me: “What can I help you with?”

(When the customer looks up from her phone after a few seconds, she says:)

Customer: “Finally. I’ve been waiting for a manager for 30 minutes!”

(I know this is a lie, because I’ve only been on the clock 15 minutes, and this is the first time I’ve come to that register. I apologize for her non-existent wait, and ask what the issue is.)

Customer: “My eggs rang up wrong, so I get these for free; I know your store policy. Take them off.”

(Our store does have a policy that if an item does not ring up at the shelf price, it is given to the customer for free. This is not one of those cases.)

Me: “What were the eggs supposed to ring up as?”

Customer: “You work here; you should know. It’s not my job to tell you the price of things.”

(I flip open the weekly ad, and find that the one-dozen store brand eggs – which she has three of — are on sale, three for $5. I look at the register, and the eggs have rung up two at $1.67, and one at $1.66, making the three dozen eggs exactly $5. I explain to the woman that her eggs have rung up correctly, and she immediately blows up.)

Customer: “You are always trying to steal from me! You never honor your store policy, and you never fix the prices that ring up wrong. It’s like this every time I come in here! I just want my d*** eggs for free like they’re supposed to be, or I’m never shopping here again! I’ve waited long enough for this s***!”

(Again, I try explaining that the $1.66, $1.67, and $1.67 she was charged for her eggs is the correct price, at three for $5, but she isn’t having it.)

Customer: “Your corporate office will hear from me immediately. I’ve never been treated so poorly by anyone at this store! I’ve shopped here for 30 years, and I’ll never set foot in here again!”

(She storms out, not paying for or taking any of her order. After she leaves, the customer behind her remarks:)

Next Customer: “I can’t believe she’s been shopping here 30 years; this store’s only been open for 22.”

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Enabling Them Getting A Ticket

, , , , , | Working | January 26, 2018

(I’m picking up my severely disabled mother from an appointment at a big medical facility. As I’m arriving, I see a delivery truck standing across the last two handicapped parking spots. The driver is still sorting packages in the back of the truck, so I quickly jump out and approach him.)

Me: “Hi. I’m not sure if you noticed, but this is actually a handicapped parking spot.”

Delivery Guy: “So? You look like you can walk just fine. There are still some spots open in the back of the parking lot, I think.”

Me: “Not that it matters, but I’m picking up a disabled person who can’t walk that far. Could you please move?”

Delivery Guy: *while already walking away with some packages* “Sure, whatever! I’m busy, so shut up!”

(By now I’m furious, so I decide to park behind him in the handicapped parking spot, effectively blocking him from driving away. I rush into the building to collect my mother as quickly as possible to avoid being towed, but as we arrive we see that there’s already a police officer next to my car talking with the delivery driver. The officer looks at me, and at my mother who’s already looking pained while walking on crutches.)

Officer: “Is this your car?”

Me: “Yes. I’m terribly sorry, but there were no other disabled parking spots, and he refused to move after I explained the situation to him. Won’t happen again. I promise!”

Officer: “Oh, don’t worry. You’re free to go!”

Me: “Thank you very much.”

(Right as I was helping my mother into the car I heard the delivery guy scream, “Wait… You’re writing ME a ticket?!”)

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This Customer Isn’t As Sharp As The Average Razor

, , , , , , | Right | January 25, 2018

(I’m working with my manager one day, when a customer comes in with a bag of shaving supply items that he purchased two months ago. We don’t accept returns on items over 15 days, but he won’t leave the store.)

Manager: “Go ahead and do a return. Just make sure the items haven’t been used; the shaving stand should be fine, though.”

Customer: “What do you mean? What if I tried the razor and didn’t like it?”

Me: “We wouldn’t be able to return it because of hygiene concerns.”

Customer: “But I only used the effing thing three times! You can resell them!”

Me: “I’m sorry, but we can’t take back or resell shaving items that have been used. It’s like with underwear; we wouldn’t be allowed to take back used underwear, because it’s gross.”

(After he argued with me, we found out he used every item he had purchased, and the shaving stand was broken, so we couldn’t return that, either. He left the store and came back the next day with the same items, hoping I wasn’t in, so he could return them.)

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