Give No Credit To The Cashiers

, , , | Right | April 11, 2018

(It has always been company policy that without a receipt the store can only refund the customer with store credit. The management in our store is particularly unwavering about this, since we have had quite a few shoplifters try to return stolen high-price items for cash. Customers will occasionally get upset with this policy and cause a scene. I am passing by the register where a new hire is dealing with one such customer. It is only her second week, and she is clearly overwhelmed.)

Me: “What seems to be the problem?”

Coworker: “She’s trying to return this item without a receipt. I’ve told her that we can only give her store credit for it.”

Customer: *angrily* “So, what? You’re not going to give me my money back?”

Me: “Without a receipt, I’m afraid we can only give it back to you as store credit. It’s just corporate policy.”

Customer: “So, then, I can’t return this and get my money back? That’s ridiculous!”

Me: *seeing that this isn’t going anywhere* “Let me double-check with my manager.”

(I step into the [empty] office, wait five seconds, and then come back out.)

Me: “Unfortunately, they said the same thing: we can only accept the return for store credit or as part of an exchange.”

Customer: *calmly* “All right. I guess I’ll just take the store credit.”

(The rest of the transaction goes smoothly and the customer leaves.)

Me: *to my coworker* “They always assume the cashiers are lying to them.”

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A Lack Of Retention Attention

, , , , , | Working | April 11, 2018

(I’m struggling with finances a bit. I have the MOST basic Internet service from the local cable company. They’re losing customers at a fairly fast rate, so it’s pretty well known that if you call and ask for a discount, even temporarily, they’ll give it to you in order to keep you as a customer. So, I call them up.)

Customer Service Representative #1: “[Cable Company], how can I help you?”

Me: “I’d like to see if I can lower my rate at all.”

Customer Service Representative #1: “Let me take a look… NOPE! That’s the best we can do for you.”

Me: “Really? You can’t even lower it a little for a short period of time?”

Customer Service Representative #1: “NOPE… That’s the best rate we have.”

(I’ve done this before, so I know they have a “customer retention” department specifically set up to keep customers who may be thinking of cancelling.)

Me: “Okay. Can you transfer me to the customer retention department?”

Customer Service Representative #1: “Sir, all of our employees are interested in retaining customers.”

Me: “Right. I get that. But I also know you have a specific department that is willing to work with customers in order to keep them as customers. Can you please transfer me?”

(This goes back and forth for twenty minutes or so. Finally…)

Customer Service Representative #1: “Fine! Please hold.”

Customer Service Representative #2: “Hello. I understand you wish to disconnect your service.”

Me: “No! I was calling to ask if I might be able to save a little money on the bill.”

Customer Service Representative #2: “Oh! Sure! I can lower your bill by $20 a month for one year. How’s that sound?”

Me: “Perfect. Thank you.”

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Not As Sour As The Customer

, , , | Right | April 11, 2018

(Every summer, my town hosts a big fair. I am working at said fair, serving drinks, when a woman comes up and orders a lemonade.)

Me: “One lemonade, coming right up!”

(All drinks are made fresh in front of the customer. I have just finished adding sugar to the water and lemon juice when the woman starts screaming at me.)

Woman: “Hey! Did you just put sugar in my lemonade?!”

Me: “Uh… Yes.”

Woman: “What’s wrong with you?! It’s mandatory that you ask people if they want sugar in their drinks before making them! There are people out there with diabetes!”

(Having worked in food services for a while, I know this is pure BS, but I remain polite.)

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. I’ll make you a new one. No sugar in this one, right?”

Woman: “D*** straight!”

(I give her the sugarless lemonade. She takes a sip and makes a face before tossing the drink in the trash.)

Woman: “It’s too sour!”

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Early Bird Gets The… Punishment?

, , , | Learning | April 11, 2018

(I’m a student in the 11th grade, and this semester, two of my classes happen to be in the same hall, so I carry around a book-bag with both class books in it so I don’t have to go back upstairs to switch them out. I have really bad anxiety, so I try my best not to be late for my history class, which is right after photography, since the teacher is very strict and has it out for me already. I leave class right after the bell rings and head down to my class, as I don’t have anything else to do. When I arrive, the door is open as students from the last class are leaving, and my teacher is talking to another teacher, so I walk in and wait for the others to arrive to set up the table. After a couple minutes, the other teacher leaves, my teacher turns to me, and the following exchange occurs:)

Teacher: “You realize that you came into class thirty seconds after the bell rang?”

Me: *confused, and not quite sure what he’s getting at* “Yeah?”

Teacher: “Where were you?”

Me: “In class. It’s right down the hall from yours.”

Teacher: “Yeah, I know, but you’re still here early. Why?”

Me: *getting even more confused, as he’s annoyed that I was on time* “I didn’t want to get yelled at for being late.”

Teacher: “Well, don’t do it again. You don’t need to be so early all the time.”

(I was very confused by the end, as it was the first time that I had ever been told off for being on time. Maybe next time I’ll just walk in late and actually give him a reason to get mad at me.)

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Disproportionately Cents-less

, , , , | Right | April 11, 2018

(I am the manager of a chain bookstore location. Customers who purchase items on our website can return online purchases to any store location; we simply enter the order number into the register and the computer takes care of the rest by processing the refund amount to the original method of payment — credit card, gift card, etc. The customer gets a print-out to show that the return has been processed. On this particular day, I am on the floor when a cashier at the cash desk has just processed an online return for a customer.)

Cashier: “[My Name], can you help out with this?”

(I approach the cash desk.)

Me: “What can I help with?”

Customer: “I returned this online order, but the computer isn’t refunding the correct amount!”

(I look at the return print-out and see that the original purchase was $53.21, and the refund amount processed is $53.20. Starting to wonder if the customer is really upset over a difference of ONE CENT, I speak with the customer.)

Me: “I apologize. The computer must have rounded off the tax differently when it did the original purchase to when it calculated the refund amount.”

Customer: “So? It charged the one cent to my credit card! What are you going to do about it?!”

(Canada stopped using pennies a few years ago, so now our lowest coin in circulation is five cents. Realizing it’s pointless to even begin to argue with a customer over ONE CENT, I open the till and give the customer a nickel.)

Me: “Here’s five cents.”

Customer: *suddenly happy* “Thank you!” *she walks off*

(Over 15 years in retail and over five years as a manager, and that was the first time I ever had somebody upset over ONE PENNY!)

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