The Recouponator

, , , , , | Right | March 2, 2018

(I am working my first job as a cashier in a large and popular retail store. I have only been there a couple of weeks. Note that while we may have coupons out on the registers, we are not allowed to offer them up. If a customer sees it in time, they may use it. If not, they can take one for another time, or just move on.)

Me: *completing the transaction* “And if you could just sign this for me?”

(Once we reach the point of a signature, there’s no going back. If something is wrong by then, a manager must do a post-sale void or adjustment.)

Customer: *sees a coupon specifically for the only thing she’s buying* “Wait. Can I use this?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I can’t apply anything else at this point. I can’t go back from here.”

Customer: “Well, can’t you just put it in?”

Me: “I don’t even have the option to go back at this point. We can only complete the transaction; maybe customer service can help you.”

(This goes on for a moment, before she finally completes it, takes her receipt, and goes to customer service. A little while later, a coworker of mine from customer service comes up to me at my register.)

Coworker: “Did you have a lady over here, complaining about—” *picks up coupon* “—one of these?”

Me: *laughing* “Yes.”

Coworker: “I just wanted to apologize for her. She was rude to me, too.”

(I told him not to worry about apologizing for her, because some people are just like that. According to him, she complained about our training. Sorry we can’t apply coupons AFTER a transaction!)

Isn’t Used To This Kind Of Treatment

, , , , , | Healthy | March 2, 2018

(I volunteer in the emergency room of a very large hospital. I’ve volunteered in other departments as well, so I’m quite familiar with the layout. I notice a woman wandering around looking lost, so I greet her and ask if I can help her find where she’s going.)

Patient: “Yeah, I have some questions about some medical treatment I’m going to be receiving.”

Me: “Sure. Which department do you need?”

Patient: “I’m not telling you my personal medical information!”

Me: “You don’t have to, ma’am. I only need to know the category of treatment so I know where to direct you.”

Patient: “Isn’t there some kind of central information desk?”

Me: “Yes, but you’ll have to tell them the same thing.”

Patient: “Well, my medical information is confidential. Just tell me where I can get my questions answered.”

Me: “In order to do that, I need some idea of what you’re here for.”

Patient: “This is a very disorganized hospital.” *walks away*

(I probably should have just directed her to Psych.)

Going To Tile A Lawsuit

, , , | Right | March 2, 2018

Me: *answers phone* “[Company], how can I help?”

Caller: “You sent me the wrong tiles; I want to return them for a refund.”

Me: “Oh, I am sorry. What is wrong with the tiles?”

Caller: “They are the wrong color.”

Me: “I am sorry. I can exchange them for the correct color, if you need.”

Caller: “No, I want a refund.”

Me: “Okay, you will have to return them to [Company address].”

Caller: “I can’t do that; I have already installed them.”

Me: “They are the wrong color, and you have installed them, and you want a refund? I am sorry; I cannot do that.”

(The caller gets very angry and begins to list off government laws around providing good quality and displayed products, and explain why she is entitled to a refund.)

Me: “I have studied these laws and acts regarding this. There is also a section saying if the goods can not be removed without destroying them, the supplier does not have to rectify the situation. These tiles are cemented to the floor; you cannot get them up.”

Caller: “I won’t stand for this. I will get my lawyer involved.”

(Two weeks later, a letter from a lawyer detailing the story above arrived, addressed to me. I emailed the lawyer a signed copy of the customer’s sales agreement, stating that the color ordered was what she got, and also a summary of what had been discussed over the phone. All I got back from the lawyer was, “Thank you. Please consider this closed.”)

Landing A Job Causes Someone Else To Crash

, , , , , , , | Working | March 2, 2018

(I am a teenager fresh out of school. I need some money but don’t have much work experience, so I apply for several retail and entry-level jobs. I get a few interviews, including one at a well-known retail chain, [Store]. The interview goes well, and I am told I’ll hear from them within the week. In the meantime, I continue going on interviews, and about two weeks later I accept a job in another field. Two full months after my interview at [Store], I get the following phone call:)

HR Representative: “Hi, this is [HR Representative] from [Store], calling for [My Name]. We just wanted to let you know that your first shift is on Monday, so we need you to come in and fill out some paperwork before then.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry. It’s been so long since the interview, and I hadn’t heard anything, so I accepted another position. I appreciate your call, but I’m afraid I won’t be able to work with you.”

HR Representative: “But you filled out an application and said you wanted a job.”

Me: “Yes, I did. But my interview was two months ago, and no one from [Store] ever contacted me to offer me a job, or to tell me that I was in line for one. Your call is the first contact I’ve had. I applied several places and have accepted a position in another field. I really needed a job, you see, so I took one when it was offered.”

HR Representative: “Well, we’re really short-staffed, so we need you to start on Monday.”

Me: “Again, I’m sorry, but I really can’t. The job I’ve accepted is full-time, Monday to Friday, so I really wouldn’t be available for anything beyond occasional part-time work.”

HR Representative: “But we need you on Monday.”

Me: *pause* “…and I’m very sorry, but I am not available.”

HR Representative: “You shouldn’t lie on your application. If you say you want a job, you should take it when it’s offered.”

Me: “That’s exactly what I did.”


Surely They’re Toying With You?

, , , , , | Right | March 2, 2018

(This has happened multiple times as I finish ringing up a customer.)

Me: “Is there anything else I can help you with today?”

Customer: “No, that’s it.”

Me: “Okay, your total is [total].”

(The customer then points at a child holding a toy, on the other side of the store, who in no way has displayed any connection to the customer until just this moment.)

Customer: “Did you get his toy?”

Me: “No. Please bring it up here and I’ll ring it up.”

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