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A Snow Storm Of Protest

, , | Right | September 18, 2017

(Anyone under the age of 18 cannot legally ring up alcohol for customers. I’m 24, but people still ask if I’m old enough to ring it. The following happens on a Thursday morning. The temperature is in the negatives, and all the local school systems have the day off.)

Customer: *sets wine on the counter* “Who can ring this?”

Me: *laughs* “Anyone who couldn’t would be in school right now, sir.”

Customer: *suddenly snotty* “Well, today’s a snow day! They aren’t in school; so THERE. You COULD be too young.”

Me: “Sir, the managers didn’t know today would be a snow day when they made the schedule a week ago.”

Customer: *grabs his things and storms out*

Washing Your Eyes In Jalapeños Would Be Less Painful

, , , , | Right | August 27, 2017

(I’m working concession at my movie theater. We offer nachos and have a few free side items to go with the nachos, including hot sauces and jalapeño slices. We ran out of jalapeños earlier in the night. A customer approaches me, clearly already grumpy and angry.)

Customer: “Get me nachos.”

Me: “Certainly, sir.”

(I fetch the nachos.)

Me: “That’ll be $6.99.”

Customer: “You’re f****** kidding me?! That’s insane! This is robbery!”

Me: “I’m truly sorry, sir.”

Customer: “Fine! But you’d better get me jalapeños!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but we ran out of jalapeños earlier.”

Customer: *scoffs and glares at me with pure rage* “Really? REALLY?! Well, then… what are you going to do for me to make up for this f****** inconvenience?!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir?”

Customer: “I WANTED jalapeños. You don’t have them. So you’re going to give me something else for free! I want more! A small popcorn!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but I’m not authorized to do that. The jalapeños are an optional free bonus item. I’m not authorized to give you a pay-item to make up for an optional free item that we’re out of.”

Customer: “Well then, give me more nacho cheese!”

Me: “I’m going to have to charge you 99 cents for the cheese.”

Customer: “Bulls***! You owe me compensation for my inconvenience!”

Me: “I really apologize, sir, but I’m really not authorized to give out free pay-items as compensation for a free optional bonus item.”

Customer: “F*** you!”

(He throws money at me and storms off. Five minutes later, I hear him swearing and screaming at the manager’s desk. A coworker who witnessed the initial exchange comes over to me.)

Coworker: “You know what’s probably happening? He’s probably trying to get you fired for following rules. And I’m willing to bet the manager is going to give him a bunch of free stuff to calm him down.”

Me: “Yeah… unfortunately, that’s probably the case.”

(A few minutes later, my manager, indeed, came over, grabbed a slew of food items, and gave them to the man for free to stop him from screaming. I was also scolded for following the rules we were told to follow about not giving out free pay-items to make up for out-of-stock free items. And I was later informed by other coworkers that the man spent the entire rest of the night swearing at and insulting them, demanding preferential treatment because that “a**hole at concession” wouldn’t give him free items. It’s incidents like this that make me want to strangle whoever coined the phrase “the customer is always right.”)


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In Line And Out Of Line, Part 13

, , , | Right | July 23, 2017

(One extremely busy day, one of our cashiers calls out, leaving me and the manager to operate the registers by ourselves. The lines are incredibly long, and a female customer wants to refund her purchase and buy it again with a coupon. While I’m doing this, the male customer behind her is getting visibly impatient. I notice the other line is long, but each person appears to have only a few items, while the female customer I’m helping has a full cart of stuff.)

Me: “Sir, I’m not sure how long this will take, so it may be faster if you get in the other line.”

Male Customer: *notices how long the line is* “Quicker?! With all those people?! What I don’t understand is why there are only TWO cashiers on a busy day like this!”

Me: I’m sorry, sir, we’re understaffed; one of our cashiers called out. If you’d like to talk to my manager, she’s right over there.”

Male Customer: “Well, you should call somebody else in or something! Having only two cashiers when it’s this busy is ridiculous!”

(The lady I’m helping overhears this and decides to stick up for me.)

Female Customer: “Sir, it’s not her fault that the lines are long. They’re doing all they can and you complaining like this isn’t going to help.”

Customer: “Yeah, well, if you don’t open your mouth, nothing gets done.”

Female Customer: “My mother has colon cancer. If waiting in line is the worst thing to happen to you…”

Male Customer: “I’m just saying, two cashiers on a day like this is completely ridiculous!”

(A younger girl, presumably the daughter of the lady I’m helping, decides to say something, as well.)

Younger Girl: “Dude… shut up!”

(The man goes silent but still is very noticeably angry. When I finally finish the lady’s transaction, the man throws his one item at me, pays as fast as he can, and storms out. There was another lady in line after him.)

Next Lady In Line: “…I’ll try to run him over in the parking lot for you.”

Related:
In Line And Out Of Line, Part 12
In Line And Out Of Line, Part 11
In Line And Out Of Line, Part 10
In Line And Out Of Line, Part 9
In Line And Out Of Line, Part 8

Seriously Cheesed Off, Part 3

, , , | Right | July 18, 2017

Me: “Hi, how can I help you?”

Customer: *distracted* “A sesame bagel, please, toasted with cream cheese.”

(I slice her bagel and put it in the toaster. While it’s toasting, I scoop out the right amount of cream cheese and put it on the deli paper.)

Customer: *suddenly annoyed* “Can you not finger-paint with my cream cheese, please?!”

(I’m shocked, but luckily, her bagel is finished toasting so I grab it and spread on the cream cheese. I go to wrap it in the deli paper when she stops me again.)

Customer: “Can you at least wrap it in a clean piece of paper?! I don’t want cream cheese crap on the OUTSIDE of my bagel!”

(Still shocked, I got a new sheet of deli wrap and proceeded to wrap her bagel. She snatched it from my hand and stalked to the register. I was still shaken from the encounter, but my coworkers had a lot of fun calling her “the bagel b****” for the rest of the day!)

Related:
Seriously Cheesed Off, Part 2
Seriously Cheesed Off


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Has A Report Retort

, , , | Right | July 7, 2017

(I am a receptionist in a corporate bank and I have to screen every call that I receive.)

Me: “Good morning, [Bank].”

Caller: “Hi, may I speak to your IT manager?”

Me: “May I know which company you are calling from, sir?”

Caller: “[Company].”

Me: “May I know the purpose of the call?”

Caller: “I would like to send a report.”

Me: “May I know what type of report, sir?”

Caller: “Look, mate, you are just the receptionist. Why are you asking 25 questions? Are you transferring my call or not?”

Me: “I’m afraid not, sir. Goodbye!” *hangs up*

(With that kind of attitude, especially when speaking in a demeaning way, may never get you through any call when you don’t even know who you would like to speak to. I’m just doing my job right, mate!)


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