Customer Stupidity Never Comes In Sample Sizes

, , , , | Right | October 3, 2017

(I am working as a manager for a demo company in a large chain store. Basically, I control the people handing out food samples. It’s ten in the morning, and the store has just opened for the day.)

Customer: “Your sample people are rude!”

Me: “I am sorry, ma’am, but I need you to explain the situation. What was rude?”

Customer: “She refused to give me a sample!” *points to a lady in the freezer section*

Me: “Ma’am, that is a frozen product, and her shift just started. It takes about twenty minutes to cook that product.”

Customer: *rolls her eyes* “That is such BS! She has a microwave! It should take seconds!”

Me: “That is a small convection oven that she has, not a microwave. Even in a microwave, it would still take several minutes to thaw out and become hot.”

Customer: “I don’t need it hot! Just a little warm!”

Me: “I would have to write her up, since serving cold food that should be hot can spread food-borne illnesses.”

Customer: “Oh, that is a myth! It’s perfectly safe! Now, make her give me an extra-big sample, or I will report you to the store manager!”

Me: “First of all, I work for a different company than this store. Second, if you want food poisoning, you will have to get it at another store. You can come back when the food is actually done, or you can go and spend a few dollars at the deli. Also, it’s against store policy to give larger sizes to anyone. Everyone gets the same size.”

Customer: “That is not a policy! You are full of it!”

Me: *points to giant sign behind me on the wall of my office that states serving temperatures and size rules*

Customer: “I will never shop here again! You are so rude, and so are your employees!”

(She was back the next day.)

Can’t Sleep Through Bad Service

, , , , , | Working | October 3, 2017

(I’m at a restaurant with my husband and his parents, along with our six-week-old daughter. She is currently happily asleep in her carrier. We’ve been seated and are waiting for our waitress. The waitress arrives, calling everyone “honey” and “sweetie.”)

Waitress: “Oh, what a cute little baby! So quiet.”

Me: *proud* “Yeah, she’s six weeks old. She’s a pretty good baby!”

Waitress: “My kids were never quiet like this! Ain’t she gonna wake up?”

Me: “She just ate, so probably not…”

Waitress: “Maybe when your food comes out she’ll wake up!”

(She then went and got our drinks. She often came back to see if my daughter was still sleeping. When she brought our meals, she SLAMMED my plate down, then checked the carrier. At this point, it was evident that she was TRYING to wake the baby, who was still happily asleep. The kicker came when the waitress brought our bill and actually intentionally reached out and smacked the back of the carrier to try to wake her! The carrier was out of the way, and the waitress wasn’t just reaching for something and accidentally bumped it. Luckily, my daughter continued to sleep. We still tipped, but who insists on trying to wake a baby?! A manager would have been called over swiftly if she had woken up my daughter!)

Don’t Call Tin Man For Charity

, , , , , | Right | October 3, 2017

(I work in a call centre, selling raffle tickets to raise money for different type of charities. This call happens to be for a heart research institute.)

Me: “Good morning, sir. My name is [Name], and I’m calling on behalf of [Heart Charity].”

Potential Customer: “Sorry, don’t have one of them.” *click*

Video Games Belong In The Kitchen!

, , , , | Working | October 3, 2017

(I’m a woman, working for a video game publishing company that also publishes smaller games by indie creators. I’ve actually worked in the industry for almost ten years, and I get along great with all my colleagues, who are mostly male. We’re in a video conference call with a young developer who is pitching us his first game. Everyone in this call, except for me, is a guy.)

Boss: “We’ve all had a chance to look over your packet, and we think it looks pretty promising, though we’ll have to play the prototype to be really sure.”

Developer: “Ah, I have that uploaded to your FTP server.”

Coworker #1: “Great. We’ll all give it a try and get back to you with feedback.”

Me: “I’m excited to check this out; I love this type of game.”

Developer: “Oh.” *looks visibly uncomfortable onscreen* “[Boss], I didn’t know… she would be playing. Are you sure that’s a good idea?”

Boss: “Uh, yeah. Why?”

Developer: “Well, I mean, she’s… she’s a… g… ” *trails off*

(It seems to dawn on everybody at once that he’s uncomfortable with me testing his game because I’m a woman.)

Coworker #2: *sputtering* “What? Wh… WHAT?”

Boss: *looking furious* “Yeah, well, don’t worry; when it comes to her feedback, I’ll be sure to have it read to you in a deeper voice so you can understand it! If you’re lucky enough to hear back from us!” *slaps laptop case shut, ending the call*

(My boss and all my coworkers are angrier than I’ve ever seen them, probably angrier than I am.)

Me: “Okay, let’s all calm down. I agree that was pretty gross, but… I don’t know, he’s pretty young. Maybe this can be a teachable moment and he can have a chance to redeem himself?”

Coworker #1: “Yeah, but then we’d have to time-travel back to the 1950s to work with him. UGH.”

Boss: “I do NOT want somebody like that representing us! I don’t even want to talk about it right now.”

(We did NOT end up working with that kid. I felt a little bad for him, in spite of everything, but also grateful that I worked with such awesome people who had my back. To his credit, he did send me a private e-mail about a year later apologizing for his behaviour, saying we were right to turn him down because it made him think about some prejudices he had, not just about women but other people as well. I accepted his apology, and I hope the rest of his life is a lot more fruitful… and less ignorant!)

A Howling Tornado Of Complaint

, , , , , | Right | October 3, 2017

(Our town has an earthquake and a tornado in the same day. The earthquake is very small, but the tornado does a lot of damage to certain areas of the town, and also wipes the power out for a day and a half. Naturally, we close the store when this happens, and reopen once the power is restored.)

Customer: “I was supposed to have my computer back yesterday, but I came in to get it and you guys were closed! I want a refund!”

Tech: “We were closed because there was a tornado and there was no power.”

Customer: “I don’t care why my computer wasn’t fixed on time! I want it done now!”

Tech: “Since we were closed, because of the tornado and all, we couldn’t repair any of the computers that were booked in. We just reopened this afternoon, so I’m starting to work on them all now.”

Customer: “Well, when will it be ready?!”

Tech: “Probably tomorrow.”

Customer: “This is ridiculous! It was supposed to be ready yesterday, and now it’s not going to be ready until tomorrow?!”

Tech: “Yes. Because there was a tornado.”

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