What Would Jesus Discount?, Part 3

, , , , | Right | December 18, 2013

(I decide to visit my old work on the off-hours for a quick bite to eat. I am served by a new cashier.)

Cashier: “Okay. That will be $11.89. Press the confirm button to make sure your order is correct.”

(I go to press confirm when this occurs at the same time.)

Cashier: “Do yo—”

Me: “Do you want any sauce with that?”

Cashier: “Uh…”

Me: “Did I just ask you if you wanted sauce?”

Cashier: “Yup. You sound like you’d be fit for this place.”

Me: “I worked the day shift.”

Cashier: “Uh, well. Okay.”

Me: “I need to get out of the food service industry.”

Cashier: “Hey, at least you didn’t scream ‘THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT!'”

(A few minutes pass. Another customer goes to order. She proceeds to yell at the cashier seconds after she finished placing her order. Having several years of bad customers under my belt I was pretty sure I could handle this one, even though I didn’t work there anymore.)

Me: “Pardon me, ma’am. What seems to be the problem?”

Customer: “THIS CASHIER OF YOURS SCREWED UP MY ORDER! I WANT MY FOOD FOR FREE, AS IT’S THE CHRISTIAN THING TO DO!”

(I see that this customer has ordered the food via a self-service order screen. The employee just reads the screen and then hands out the order.)

Me: “Ma’am, I find it hard to believe that this cashier managed to screw up an order that is entirely dependent on the customer’s order screen.”

Customer: “Don’t you dare talk back to me! It isn’t the Christian thing to do! God will ha—”

Me: “Pardon me for a second, but I don’t understand you. While I might not be Christian, you claim talking back to you is not Christian. I’m not sure at what point you manage to assume a role higher than God to be able to dictate what is and isn’t ‘Christian.’ In fact just by doing that you are breaking two of the seven deadly sins! I’m sure that isn’t the CHRISTIAN thing to do.”

Customer: “You’ll burn in Hell for this! I’ll make sure of it!”

Me: “But isn’t that conspiring with the D—”

Customer: “F*** YOU!”

(The customer proceeds to run out of the building.)

Cashier: “Wow…”

Me: “The sad part is, she is a regular here and has been pulling that for months. Well, you had your weird customer, and your first ‘Not Always Right.’ I guess it’s time for your first tip.”

Cashier: “This has been a long night…”

(The cashier and I have been best friends ever since. That was her first day working there. Thankfully, she never saw the lady again.)

 

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Poorly Perceived

, , , , , , | Right | December 12, 2013

(I work at a restaurant in a very rich town, in which I also live. I am getting my hair done at a ‘posh’ salon when I see one of my regulars from the restaurant sitting in the first chair.)

Me: “Hello Mrs. [Customer]. Good to see you.”

Customer: “Oh, hel— Aren’t you my waitress from the place down the road?”

Me: “Yes, I am. How are you doing today?”

Customer: “I didn’t know people like you were allowed in a place like this.”

Me: “Excuse me?”

(At this point my stylist comes over to bring me to her station.)

Customer: *to stylist* “Honey, did you know this girl is a waitress? Are you sure she has enough money to pay? You may want to check before you start serving her.”

Stylist: “Ma’am, [My Name] has been a client here for two years. She’s very reliable.”

Customer: “Oh, my. What a waste of money. Poor girls like you should not be wasting their money on things like this. Don’t you have a child to care for or something of the like?”

(At this point everyone in the salon is quite uncomfortable and is staring at the three of us.)

Me: “I’m so sorry, Mrs. [Customer]. I actually only work at the restaurant because I don’t like to spend my time being unproductive. You see, I am a college student at [Very Prestigious College]. I am currently studying to be a biomedical engineer, which I’ll have you know is the second top-grossing career currently. And since it seems to matter to you so much, I’m quite financially comfortable! And even if I were a poor waitress, as you so kindly suggested, people are free to do whatever they like with the money they work so hard for! Your husband comes in twice a week to get coffee and sit at our counter and complain about you! So really, Mrs. [Customer], I’m very, very sorry for you.”

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Needs To Work On His Socialist Skills, Part 3

, , , , | Right | December 11, 2013

(I am a cashier at a dollar store. Lately, we’ve been collecting school supplies for a charity that donates them to military families. As such, we have to ask customers if they would like to purchase an item for this charity.)

Me: “Would you also be interested in purchasing an item for [Charity] today?”

Man: “What is that? Some sort of communist youth organization?”

Me: *dumbfounded* “Uhm, no, sir. It donates school supplies to military families with children.”

Man: “Well, same thing, right?”

(I stand there for a few seconds, just silently blinking and staring at him.)

Me: “…no, sir. Not even close.”

Related:
Needs To Work On His Socialist Skills, Part 2
Needs To Work On His Socialist Skills


This story is part of our Customers Who Dislike Charity roundup!

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Got The Wrong (Hair) Extension

, , , | Right | December 9, 2013

(My salon has had the weeks before Christmas booked out since way back in March. In mid-November, I take a phone call.)

Caller: “I need a booking to get extensions, a full head of foils, and a cut, for Saturday, the 21st of December.”

Me: “I’m sorry. We don’t have anything for the entire month of December.”

Caller: “Great. So how’s ten in the morning?”

Me: “I’m really sorry. We just don’t have any appointments in December. The next appointment for what you need is on January 30th.”

Caller: “Listen, you stupid little cow. I SAID, the 21st of December, at ten. Grab your little appointment book and book me in with [My Name]. I swear, she’s the only competent one of the lot of you!”

Me: “You do realise I’m [My Name], right?”

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In Line And Out Of Line, Part 2

, , , , , | Right | December 9, 2013

(I’m standing in line at a Black Friday sale, waiting to check out my purchases. We’ve been standing about 45 minutes as the lines are very, VERY long. There is a man all by himself, with no cart and no purchases, standing two customers in front of me. All of a sudden his wife pulls two carts over, with their daughter pushing another one. All three carts are filled completely. They push through the line and get in with him. One of the customers in the line speaks up.)

Customer #1: “Hey! You can’t just cut in line like that. We’ve been waiting an hour. Get to the back!”

Cutting Customer: “F*** you! It’s not my fault you don’t know how to shop. Mind your own f****** business!”

Me: “Excuse me. Would you mind watching your language? I don’t want my son to hear that.”

Cutting Customer: “You can kiss my a**, b****! That little p**** is going to learn it one way or the other. He’s an ugly little SOB with that hair cut, anyway!”

My Son: “I’m growing my hair to donate to kids with cancer, like my best friend!”

(The cutting customer’s daughter decides to speak up.)

Cutting Customer’s Daughter: “Your little f** friend should just die. Why do they give them treatments for that s*** anyway? I hope he dies, you little a**-wipe.”

(My four-year-old son starts crying, asking me if his friend is going to die. I try to calm him down. Meanwhile, my friend gets the manager of the store.)

Manager: “Ma’am, this woman just told me what you said to her son and that you cut in line. I’m going to ask you once to please move to the back of the line; otherwise, you’ll need to leave the store.”

Cutting Customer: “Now, you look here! You can’t make us move. We’re buying more than $1000 worth of stuff here! And that b**** and her snot nosed kid got what they deserved.”

(The manager got on his walkie-talkie and had security escort them out. Upon the manager’s and several customers’ suggestions, we file verbal harassment charges on the customers who cut in. The manager made a donation for $500 to the charity that my son’s friend had out in my son’s name. We cut his hair three months later, donating 18 inches, which they made into a wig. His friend made a full recovery, by the way. They both donate their hair about every five years.)

Related:
In Line And Out Of Line


This story is part of our Black Friday roundup!

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