Unfiltered Story #208038

, , | Unfiltered | September 14, 2020

(In a horumonyaki restaurant in Japan. Horumonyaki is a sort of beef/pork BBQ featuring the unpopular body parts such as intestines and uterus.)

The waitress is a young and very cute Myanmar girl, my friend makes order in English which is not native for all of us:

– Do you have that part, I forgot the name in English, vagina, in menu?
– Sorry, today we don’t have vagina.

I break in:
– You don’t have vagina? That changes my plans for tonight!

23 Amazing Stories About Japan! – The Not Always Right World Tour!

, | Right | August 29, 2020

Dear readers,

It’s time to continue the Not Always Right world tour! Last time, we visited India, and before that The Philippines and Brazil! Today, at your request, we are heading to that crazy island where a mega-technopolis sits next to beautiful countryside, where a perfect cone volcano can be seen from a high-speed train that whisks you across the country in a matter of hours… yes… we’re going to Japan!

Japan is an island nation, but is actually made up of 6,852 islands in total! However, of its 127 million inhabitants, a whopping 37 million live in its capital, Tokyo, making it the largest urban area in the world by population. It has a diverse history, from alternating periods of war and peace during its imperial times, to tales of great battles involving the infamous samurai. Today, it’s known as a leader in electronics, animation, whiskey, and cars!

To continue the Not Always Right world tour, we’ve gone through our archives to find 23 stories about, or set in Japan! We hope you enjoy it!

 

Watashi Whaaa – This roundup is off to a really… discouraging start…

Se Habla Japañol – This one’s a trilingual delight!

Shogun The Way To Go Home – Close your mouth and open your ears, lady.

(more…)

Well, First, I Plug In My PlayStation…

, , , , , , | Learning | July 12, 2020

I’m an American who lives in Tokyo teaching English. I’m just finishing up a forty-minute lesson with two intermediate-level students: a middle-aged man and a young woman. I always use the last minutes to ask if the students have any questions about anything since this is usually their only time to interact with a non-Japanese person.

Me: “Okay, guys, before we finish, do you have any questions about anything? About the lesson? About America? About me?”

Male Student: “Do you like Japanese girls?”

This is a really common question asked by male students to male teachers.

Me: “Um, no. Actually, I like Japanese guys. I’m gay.”

Male Student: “Oh.”

The conversation goes silent. I’m pretty open about that fact and students are always very nice about it, but it usually is a conversation stopper.

Me: “Okay, so, no more questions?”

Male Student: “How do you, um…”

The student pauses for a moment, obviously struggling to find the right words.

Male Student: “How do you, um… play in the nighttime?”

I’m completely taken aback by his question and try to think of something to say, but before I can, the female student speaks up.

Female Student: “Hey, hey, I don’t want to hear this. Please ask him after the lesson!”

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S***ler

, , , , , | Related | March 9, 2020

I am playing the board game “Secret Hitler” with my wife and friends. It’s similar to “Werewolf,” in that you are assigned a role and have to keep it secret whether you are a good guy or a bad guy. The point of the game is to try to kill Hitler or get Hitler elected, and nobody is supposed to let on who their assigned role is.

It’s our first time playing this game. I have been dealt the card for Hitler, and my wife is reading out the instructions.

“Everybody close your eyes. Hitler and the fascist should open their eyes and acknowledge each other.”

We do so, and then there is a long pause while the other fascist and I wait for the next instruction. It takes a while to come and I get impatient. 

“And then we close our eyes again?” 

A disbelieving silence comes from the rest of the table, and then I speak again.

“S***.”

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Those Prices Are Not Healthy

, , , , | Healthy | October 21, 2019

I’m an American living and working in Japan. One day, I get severely ill, so I call an ambulance and am taken to the hospital. It turns out to be an easily treated condition, but they keep me in for observation overnight.

During checkout the next day, they keep warning me and apologizing that payment will be expensive, even with my insurance. “I’m so sorry but it will be pricey,” is something I hear from several people. 

At that point, I’m a little worried about the cost, but checkout is almost done and they present me with the bill — about ¥30,000, a little under $300 US.

I surprise them when I start laughing, then horrify them when I say that an ambulance ride, hospital stay, and followup medication in the US would easily add up to at least ten times that price!


This story is part of our Japan roundup!

Read the next Japan roundup story!

Read the Japan roundup!

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