A High Instance Of Asking About Getting High

, , , , | Right | December 7, 2018

(We sell a cannabis energy drink that has hemp seed oil in it. This conversation happens one or two times every week.)

Customer: “Does this have pot in it?”

Me: *stares*

Customer: “Does it?”

Me: “Well, pot is still illegal in Tennessee. What do you think?”

Customer: “Um, well, but… What’s in it? Fake pot?”

Me: “Hemp seed oil.”

Customer: “What’s that?”

Me: “That’s the part of the plant that can be used for making paper and macramé jewelry.”

Customer: “Does it get you high?”

Me: *sigh* “No. If it did, I’d be drinking them all the time.”

Buy One, Get Two Idiots

, , , , , | Right | December 7, 2018

(We run buy-one-get-one-half-off, and buy-one-get-one-for-a-dollar sales.)

Customer: “If I buy one at $9.99, I get the $19.99 one half-price, right?”

Me: “Where are you getting that deal?”

Customer: “Nowhere.”

Me: “Okay. If you find that deal somewhere, you come back and tell me. Promise?”

Customer: “Okay!”

(The customer picks out two pieces for the BOGO $1 sale that are the same price.)

Customer: “Which one will be a $1?”

Me: “They’re the same price.”

Customer: “Yeah, so which one do I get for $1?”

Me: *blinks* “Whichever one you want.”

If It Ain’t Broke, Go To Lunch

, , , , | Working | March 9, 2018

(I work at a casino, and currently I’m working at the cashier cage. Each cage has only one of my position at any time, so break times aren’t usually important, since nobody ever needs to cover me. Because of this, I usually take my lunch pretty late in my shift. One day I get called into the office by my manager, who tells me that I need to take my lunch exactly four hours into my shift, since my late lunches are disrupting everyone else. I agree and go back to work. However, the very next day, I call to go to my lunch right on time, getting the same manager.)

Me: “Hey, I’m going to take my lunch.”

Manager: “Oh, can you wait 20 minutes? We’re busy over here, and can’t send someone else over there.”

Me: “What? Nobody needs to cover me, and you just yelled at me for taking my lunch late.”

Manager: “Well, I still need you to wait. Call back in 20 minutes!” *hangs up*

(I wound up waiting almost two hours to take my lunch, which was the time I was taking them before. After that, I just kept taking my lunches at the same time, and my manager never said another word.)

Season Pass For Entitlement

, , , , , | Right | January 24, 2018

(I work in an amusement park that has a water park next to it, but they aren’t connected. This happens on a hot summer day when the water park has hit maximum capacity.)

Guest: “The water park is being so stupid!”

Me: “How?”

Guest: “They aren’t letting anyone in. They have the entrance completely blocked off!”

Me: “They are at max capacity.”

Guest: “Well, we are season pass holders, so we should get in!”

Me: “But they are at maximum capacity. They can’t fit any more people in; there’s no room.”

Guest: “They should make room, since we are season pass holders. We should have priority over one-day tickets.”

Me: “So, what you are saying is, you want them to kick the day ticket people out so you can get in?”

Guest: “Well, I– I mean I– No, I, uh– Season pass holders should be top priority, so we should get in first! So, yes, that would be nice, if it were possible.”

(I gave her a look that could only be described as saying, “Seriously?” She just grinned and walked away.)