No ID, No Idea What Just Happened

, , , , , | Right | December 17, 2018

(I am working at a local chain grocery store well known in the Midwest. I am working as a cashier when two gentlemen walk up with a huge bottle of alcohol. I greet them and ring up the bottle, when I get a screen asking for a date of birth to be entered in, which always happens when ringing up alcohol or cigarettes.)

Me: “May I see an ID, please?”

Customer #1: “Uh… I left it at home.”

Me: “Well, in order for me to sell you this alcohol I need to see an ID.”

Customer #1: “I forgot it… Could you just let this one slide?”

(I know that if I sell alcohol to underage people I will immediately lose my job.)

Me: “Sir, I’m sorry. I can’t do that, otherwise I would lose my job.”

Customer #1: *sighs* “Okay.” *he then proceeds to reach into his coat and hand me his ID even though he told me he had forgotten it*

(I finish ringing up his alcohol which was approximately $80, and he ended up being 22 years old. I’m still dumb-founded by this encounter today, and it was three years ago.)

Pouring Oil On To These Troubled Waters

, , , , | Right | December 16, 2018

(Our store has a policy that if a gas motor item has had gas and oil put into it, it is no longer returnable. This happens when someone tries to return a mower.)

Me: “Did you put gas and oil into it?”

Customer: “Yeah, I tried to start it and it wouldn’t pull.”

Me: “Sorry, sir, but since you added fluids, it is no longer returnable. You can take it to a repair center free of charge, as you bought the warranty.”

Customer: “Are you f****** kidding me? I work seven days a week and only get three hours off. I have no time to go to a center; give me a new f****** mower.”

Me: “Sir, I can’t.”

Customer: “Well, f*** you, then! Let me speak to a manager.”

(The manager is on his way over already because of the fuss created.)

Manager: “Sir, I can give you the address to the repair center.”

Customer: “I already told your stupid employee that I don’t have any time. Now, give me a new g**d*** mower!”

Manager: “Sir, there is nothing I can do besides—”

Customer: “Well, so much for customer f****** service!” *gives the mower a massive kick and storms out*

Manager: “Guess he didn’t need to mow his grass, then.”

(Funny thing was, that policy was posted in big block letters on the receipt that he brought in to try to return it.)

He’s From Iowa, But He Works In Outer Space

, , , , | Learning | December 11, 2018

(We are assigned homework to research famous people from our home state of Iowa, to give a five-minute presentation. I have totally forgotten this, and thanks to the power of the alphabet I am called up first. Panicking about getting a failing grade, I decide to take a risk and totally wing it about the only famous person from Iowa that I know of.)

Me: “Today, my report is about Captain James Tiberius Kirk.”

(I look directly at my teacher, and breathe a sigh of relief when I don’t see a glimpse of recognition.)

Teacher: “Captain? So, you’ve chosen a military figure?”

Me: “Yes, but I chose him because he was captain of a ship that was more famous for its exploratory missions.”

Teacher: “Please, continue!”

Me: “His ship was called The Enterprise. He wasn’t the first or last captain of this vessel, but he is by far its most famous captain. As I said, it was primarily an exploratory ship, but it did have its fair share of battles. His most famous known tactical move was called. ‘The Corbormite Maneuver.’ He also helped negotiate peace with a mining team who had inadvertently started excavating where the locals lived and raised their young. If it were not for him, there would have been a deadly battle between them and the natives, but he was able to make the miners see the locals as intelligent beings that were worthy of protection.”

(I continued in this vein, and easily could have gone for more than the allotted five minutes! My teacher gave me an A and was the none the wiser. I’m very thankful for inheriting my parents’ encyclopedic knowledge of fifty-year-old episodes of “Star Trek”!)

Unfiltered Story #129049

, , , , | Unfiltered | December 1, 2018

I am on the management team of a very large sporting goods retailer and it’s a busy Saturday. As I am floor managing a customer waves me down asking to be let into a fitting room. As I open the door I find one of our part-time college student sales people relaxing inside! He was always kind of a slug, and had recently given his 2 weeks notice. I got his keys and name tag and let him know his services were no longer needed. What got me was just how nonchalantly he took it in stride, like it was no big deal. Future leaders!

Black Friday Now Starts Before Black Friday

, , , , , | Right | November 22, 2018

(I am a worker at a sit-down restaurant. I seat people, and bus and wipe tables. It’s Black Friday and we open at 11:00; it’s 10:45. I am wiping tables and doing opening things to be prepared. A clueless customer sneaks in through the staff entrance that clearly says STAFF ONLY and has our times posted. She and her daughter go to the bathroom and we continue working without seeing them. I walk up to the tables near the bathroom and see them.)

Customer: “Hi. We have six people, two kids.”

Me: “Ma’am, we aren’t open yet. You can go up to wait; stand by the front door and wait until 11:00.”

Customer: “But I’m in here. I need to be seated so I have a table.”

Me: “I promise you, you’ll be first in line but we aren’t open. You won’t be helped until we are open, in ten minutes.”

Customer: “Bring me your manager! I’m gonna get you fired.”

(I brought over the manager and she said the same thing and finally gave in. We sat her and all we heard was her complaining about not being helped because we aren’t open. It was a long day.)

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