The Real Reason For Head-On Collisions

, | Stockton, CA, USA | Extra Stupid

(I am a claims adjuster talking to a driver recently involved in a car accident. I am asking him questions to hear his side of the story of what happened.)

Me: “So there are 3 lanes on this highway? Were you in the left, middle, or right lane?”

Driver: “The right lane.”

(The police report indicates differently.)

Me: “Are you sure you are in the right lane?”

Driver: *thinking* “No, no, I was in the LEFT lane! You see, I’m left-handed, so everything is reversed for me.”

Health Care(less), Part 3

, | Mississippi, USA | Money

(I get a lot of billing questions on the phone.)

Customer: *irately* “I need to know why my insurance was canceled at the end of July.”

(I look up his policy in our database.)

Me: “Sir, you haven’t paid your bill since May.”

Customer: “I have to pay my bill?”

Health Care(less), Part 2
Health Care(less)

A Bozo By Any Other Name, Part 3

, | Pennsylvania, USA | Uncategorized

(As part of my job, I have to call potential leads and obtain information so that we can give them a quote. I am on the phone with a customer and have just finished obtaining all of the information I need.)

Me: “That’s all the information I need. One of the agents will contact you within a few days and will send a copy of the quote to your email address.”

Customer: “What is your name?”

Me: “My name is Carolyn.”

Customer: “No. Your name is Carol-INE. Do you mind if I call you Caroline?”

Me: “Sure?”

Customer: “Thanks, Carol-INE! Have a good day!”

A Bozo By Any Other Name, Part 2
A Bozo By Any Other Name

In Case Of Emergency, Use Brain

, | Hanover, Germany | Extra Stupid

(I’m working in the insurance field service. One of many things I have to deal with is containing damages on the telephone.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [insurance company]. How may I assist you?”

Customer: “My house is burning!”

Me: *confused* “Your house is burning?”

Customer: “My house is burning! What should I do?”

Me: “Have you called the fire department?”

Customer: “No, I thought the insurance wanted to see the damage before–” *disconnects*

Zombies Need Life Insurance Too

| VA, USA | Uncategorized, Zombies

Me: “Thank you for calling [company]. How may I help you?”

Customer: “Yes, I’d like to find out about getting life insurance for my sister.”

Me: “Okay, I can connect you with an agent.”

Customer: “Wait, I have a question.”

Me: “No problem, what is your question?”

Customer: “Well, my sister died two days ago. Is that going to make it more expensive?”

Zombies Need Retail Contractors Too
Zombies Need Retail Assistance Too
Zombies Need Tech Support Too
Zombies Need Healthcare Too
Zombies Need High Speed Internet Too

Page 6/11First...45678...Last