Me: “Welcome to the [Insurance Company]. You’re speaking with [My Name].”

Caller: “Oh, hi. I don’t have my policy number or anything, but I have my name and address and I need to ask some questions.”

(Usually if they need to ask questions it’s for a claim.)

Me: “That’s fine. Is this for a claim?”

Caller: “Oh, no. It’s just a few questions about my policy.”

(I proceed to find her on the system.)

Me: “Okay, so this is for your home insurance policy. What can I help you with?”

Caller: “Okay. Well, a lil’ while ago a few tree limbs and branches fell on my house and I took out a claim and I wanted to know how it’s going?”

Me: “… Let me transfer you to claims.”

(I work in a call center as a sales agent for a local insurance agency.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Company]. My name is [Name] and I’m a licensed insurance agent. I see here that you’re calling in to get a quote.”

Customer: “I certainly am not! I keep getting all you god-d*** junk mail and I want it to stop! I don’t want your stupid insurance!”

Me: “Well, I’m so sorry about that, sir. I can definitely understand how frustrating it is to have a mailbox full of junk mail. Can I have your last name, state, and zip code?”

Customer: “What the f*** do you need that for? I’m not giving you ANYTHING! Just take me off your d*** mailing list!”

Me: “Sir, in order to remove you from our mailing list, I need to find the file we’ve opened for you so we know WHERE to stop sending the mail.”

Customer: “No, you don’t! This is ridiculous! Just take me off the f****** list!”

Me: “Again, sir, I can’t stop sending mail to your address unless I actually have it and I can’t find any of your information without your last name, your state, and your zip code.”

Customer: “F*** you!” *click*

Me: “Motor Claims, this is [my name].”

Customer: “God, finally. I’ve been on hold to you for ages! My claim number is [insert number].”

Me: “I’m so sorry to hear that. Here, let me ring this up for you.”

(I get halfway through before I realize something is off about the number the customer has given me.)

Customer: “I’m sick to the teeth! I need to know what you guys are doing with my car!”

Me: “Uhm, ma’am—”

Customer: “You keep telling me it will be ready this week! Someone will call me back! Blah blah blah!”

Me: “Ma—”

Customer: “Just tell me what’s going on with my car!”

Me: “I… can’t.”

Customer: “What?!”

Me: “I can’t tell you what’s going on with your car.”

Customer: “Wait, why not?!”

Me: “This isn’t one of our claim numbers.”

Customer: “Is this [other insurance company]?”

Me: “No, madam. This is [insurance company].”

Customer: “Well f***. I just wasted half an hour of my life.” *click*

(I’m 20 at the time and training a temp worker who was in her 40s.)

Me: “Okay, so all the claims are filed first by the year the loss occurred, then alphabetically by last name. Any questions?”

New Hire: “Nope, it’s pretty standard.”

(A few hours later…)

Me: “[New Hire], can you please find these three files for me?”

New Hire: “Okay, found them.”

(I look at the new hire’s empty hands.)

Me: “…Where are they?”

New Hire: “Right where they should be: Smith is under ‘S’, Jones is under ‘J’, and Anderson is under ‘A’.”

(My insurance company is supposed to cover one physical per calendar year. However, I am surprised to receive a bill from my doctor’s office. With it is a letter from the insurance company stating that they will not cover because I’ve had two physicals in one year. Since I know this is not true, I decide to call.)

Customer Service Rep: “Hello, this is [name]; how can I help you?”

Me: “I’m calling to dispute a denied claim. My name is [name] and my birth date is [birthday].”

Customer Service Rep: “Okay, I’m looking at your information now. Looks like you were denied coverage because you had two physicals in one year, and we only cover one per year.”

Me: “Yes, I know that. But I didn’t have two in one year. I’m looking at my records and the appointments were a year and a day apart.”

Customer Service Rep: “Hmm. Let me look at that again. Okay, according to what your doctor sent us, your most recent appointment was December 6th, and last year’s was December 5th. Oh, that is over a year. I’m so sorry!”

Me: “No worries. So what happened?”

Customer Service Rep: “Looks like someone on our end entered this year’s appointment as December 4th, which caused the system to reject the claim. I will fix that and re-submit it for you. I am so sorry!”

Me: “Hey, it’s all right.”

Customer Service Rep: “I wish I knew who did that! I’m really sorry, it wasn’t me…”

Me: “I’m not blaming you. I used to work in retail, so I know how it feels to get yelled at by a customer for something that’s out of your control.”

Customer Service Rep: “Oh! You understand!”

Me: “The stories I could tell… so do I need to call my doctor or anything?”

Customer Service Rep: “Nope. I just resubmitted it with the correct dates. There shouldn’t be any more issues. Thank you for being so nice!”