The Glaring Is Not Coming From The Lenses

, , , , | Right | March 23, 2020

(I am taking a passport photo for a lady.)

Me: “Can you please remove your glasses?”

Customer: “No.”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “I don’t have to take off my glasses. It’s not the law.”

Me: “We prefer if you take your glasses off for passport photos.”

Customer: “I looked it up before I came and you don’t have to take your glasses off!”

Me: “You’re right, you don’t have to. But if there is any glare at all on your lenses, your photo will get rejected, and you will have to pay for us to take it again. It’s very difficult to take a photo with a flash without getting any glare, so if you leave them on, your photo will probably get rejected.”

(The customer took her glasses off without saying anything.)

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Carting Around That Insult All Day

, , , , , | Working | March 22, 2020

(I work as a bagger at a supermarket but will often be given other jobs to do, such as helping customers out to their vehicles and collecting store baskets and putting them in the lobby. Often, I will be given a cart full of discarded groceries that need to go back on the proper shelves. Whenever I’m doing the latter, it only takes me thirty minutes to an hour to put the discarded items back on the shelves. When I’m done and head back up to the front of the store, a female coworker always makes a smart-a** remark about how I’m doing nothing but pushing an empty cart around all day. Thanks to her, a male coworker eventually begins making the same accusation. One day, after punching back in from my break, the male coworker pushes an empty cart in my direction.)

Male Coworker: “Here, [My Name], here’s an empty cart for you to push around all day.”

Me: “Yeah, but unlike your head, that cart won’t stay empty.”

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Sounds Like They Got Their Sodium Lauryl Sulfates In A Twist

, , , , , | Right | March 22, 2020

(It’s early morning on my birthday. My coworkers have decorated my cubicle and brought me gifts. I’m feeling chipper and optimistic. I take my first call.)

Me: “[Business], this is [My Name]; how may I help you?”

Customer: “Hi, is your shampoo color-safe?”

Me: “Yes. In fact, it contains ingredients that are intended to help protect and preserve the life of your color.”

Customer: “But it contains sulfates, which cause fading.”

Me: “Our cleansers do contain sulfates, which have been used in shampoos widely and safely for decades. It will not fade your color. Our Anti-Color-Fade complex also helps with that.”

Customer: “But you just said there were ingredients that helped preserve your color. What are they?”

Me: “There are botanicals and our Anti-Color-Fade Complex in the shampoo, which help protect artificial color in the hair.”

Customer: “You’re not listening to me. I said, ‘What ingredients protect color?’. You’re not making yourself sound very credible, [My Name].”

(Shampoo ingredients are almost exclusively chemical, and have names that I, let alone a customer, wouldn’t understand. Every other customer I’ve ever spoken to has found my previous answer sufficient, so this accusation catches me off guard.)

Me: “Umm… I don’t know the exact ingredients. They have chemical names.”

Customer: “So, you won’t tell me.”

Me: “Ma’am, I can’t tell you because I don’t know.”

Customer: “Well, you know what, [My Name]? I think you need an attitude adjustment. You’ve been very snotty with me. I asked a simple question you are obviously too lazy or stupid to answer. I am a paying customer of your products, and I don’t need this behavior from you!”

(Looking around at my birthday presents and smiling coworkers, I just sort of break down.)

Me: “You know what? I don’t need it from you, either!”

Customer: “I’d like to speak to your manager!”

Me: “Absolutely!”

(I have just enough breath to tell my supervisor what happened before bursting into tears.)

Supervisor: “Hi, how can I help you?”

Customer: “That last girl I spoke to was so rude! I don’t know if she’s on drugs or if she’s just a brat, but she clearly isn’t suited to be answering customer questions! She needs to get off the phone and come back once she learns some manners!”

Supervisor: “Ma’am, I overheard your conversation and [My Name] was more than polite and helpful, right up until you personally attacked her. You should also know she is my friendliest employee, and you were her first call of the day, which happens to be her birthday. Now, would you like me to answer your original question, or would you like to berate me, as well?”

(The customer sheepishly repeated her question, my supervisor answered her in the exact same manner I did, and the customer hung up without saying thank you!)

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Trust The Process

, , , , , | Working | March 20, 2020

(My debit card company puts a hold on my card every time I travel more than fifty miles. It starts to get ridiculous. I call their number.)

Me: “You’ve blocked my card again! What do I have to do to convince you that I drive around the state frequently and my charges are not fraudulent?”

Operator: “You’re based out of Missouri, correct?”

Me: “Yes.”

Operator: “Were you in a [Fast Food Restaurant] in San Jose, California yesterday?”

Me: “Um… no.”

Operator: “So, maybe we weren’t overreacting.”

Me: “Yes, ma’am.”

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How Can I Frame This Differently?

, , , , , | Right | March 19, 2020

Customer: “Can I take a frame out of the box to see what size it is?”

Me: “No, but I can find out the size for you.”

(I do a quick examination of the box.)

Me: “The size is 8×11.”

Customer: “There’s no way that’s 8×11.”

(She then opens the box! My coworker’s jaw and mine both hit the floor.)

Customer: “I know you said I couldn’t open it but I have to verify the size.” 

(Once she had “verified the size,” she then began trying to stuff the frame back into the box. It wouldn’t fit. She began to get frustrated and grabbed another box and asked to purchase it. I started off the ringing process, and while she wasn’t looking, I wrapped the opened box and frame and slipped it into her bag without her noticing. It was my small revenge for the lady who couldn’t care less about what I had to say.)

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