Have A Lot To Answer For

, , , , , | Learning | September 5, 2017

(My friend and I are taking a summer class together. It’s one of the most basic ones in our major, and is a pretty small class, so the teacher is pretty laid back about it. We have the option to do the final on our own at home or during the final class, and he gives us free reign to help each other. About halfway through, the first person submits the test.)

Classmate: “Hey, guys… I just submitted the test and it’s showing me the correct answers.”

(We all stop working and look at the teacher.)

Teacher: *laughs and shrugs* “Go for it.”

(So, the classmate read off all the answers one by one. Easiest A ever!)

Not Too Chicken To Confront Mom

, , , , , , | Right | June 30, 2017

(I work at a fast food chicken restaurant and it’s a very slow day. A lady with two little kids comes in.)

Lady: “Can I have a hamburger and kids meals for these two–”

Me: “Ma’am, we are a chicken—”

Lady: “—and I want two root-beers and a water.”

Me: “Ma’am, we are a chicken—”

Lady: *yelling over me* “AND I WANT SOME FRENCH FRIES!”

Me: “Ma’am, we are [Fast Food Chicken Restaurant].”

Lady: *visually angry* “NO, YOU AREN’T! YOU ARE WHAT I TELL YOU WHAT YOU ARE, AND YOU’RE [Burger Chain]!”

Little Boy #1: “Mom, this is [Fast Food Chicken Restaurant].”

Lady: “NO, IT’S NOT, [Little Boy #1]!”

Little Boy #2: “Mom, what does it the sign above the menu say?”

Lady: “[Fast Food Chicken Restaurant].”

Little Boy #1 & #2: “So we’re in the wrong place, so let’s leave.”

(Lady left with her kids. Never in my career have I seen two little kids correct their parent like that. I was speechless the rest of the day.)

Quitters’ Anonymous

, , , , , | Working | June 23, 2017

(I work at a trucking company on night shift and I dispatch our drivers, answering phone calls and messages. One night I got a call from the wife of one of our drivers.)

Me: “[Company], this is [My Name].”

Woman: “Hi, my husband drives for you and wants to quit and is wondering where to return his truck.”

Me: “Is he under a load right now?”

Woman: “Yes, I think he’s somewhere in Louisiana right now.”

(Wondering why he isn’t calling us, I try to get some information so I can look him up in our system, and also wondering if I’ll need to get someone else to take care of his load if he quits while hauling a loaded trailer.)

Me: “Do you know his driver ID number or truck number?”

Woman: “No, he doesn’t want you to know that.”

Me: “Can you ask him to call us so we can help him?”

Woman: “No, he doesn’t want to talk to you.”

Me: “Okay, can I have his name?”

Woman: “No, he doesn’t want you to know who he is.”

Me: “Well, ma’am, without knowing who he is, there’s not much I can do.”

Woman: *seeming to realize that he can’t quit his job anonymously* “I’ll ask him for more information.” *hangs up*

(Later, he did call us and we were able to help him, but how did he expect his wife to quit his job for him without telling us who was quitting?)

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