Not Quite His Style(us)

, , , , | Right | February 19, 2018

(I’m a cashier and I’ve just started an eight-hour shift. The customer slides his card and hits “credit.” He approves the amount, and I type in the last four numbers on his card. When it comes to his signature he can’t get it to write. Our pads are picky, and if you put the stylus down too close to either the top or bottom lines of the box, it won’t write anything.)

Customer: “It’s not writing.”

Me: “Sorry, sir. You have to put the pen down in the middle of the box.”

Customer: “I don’t have a pin; this is credit.”

Me: “You have to put the pen on the box.”

(The customer then lays the stylus sideways on the signature box.)

Me: “Sir, you have to put the tip of the pen, that you write with, in the middle of the box, so that it’ll write.”

(Finally the customer understood and signed his name. Through this, one of my managers was standing behind me, trying not to laugh.)

Unfiltered Story #105422

, , | Unfiltered | February 14, 2018

(I’m working the closing shift. It’s 8:15 pm and I’ve already cleaned out the hot case. A customer comes by…)

Me: “Hello.”

Customer: “Where are your chicken tenders?”

Me: “Flown the coop.”

(The customer leaves. Two dark cases with no food in them; of course there’s plenty of food.)

Unfiltered Story #105201

, | Unfiltered | February 11, 2018

(I used to work at an inexpensive chain clothing store. The return policy is fairly standard, 30 days with a receipt. It was a slow weekday morning so I was the only cashier. A well-dressed woman with an expensive-looking purse comes in and walks up to the register)
Customer: I have a return (starts to dig in her purse)
Me: Ok, would you like to exchange it for something else or just return it?
Customer: Just return them. I was cleaning out my husband’s closet and found them. There’s no receipt.
(She shows me a pair of hideous maroon and olive tube socks. The packaging is still intact but doesn’t look like any Brand packaging I’d ever seen at the store, so I know it must be really old)
Me: umm ok
(Scans socks, computer burps out an angry error message)
Me: I’m sorry, the computer isn’t even registering these as an item we sell. I can’t return them.
(My manager has been hanging out nearby. She stays quiet but walks up behind me and starts writing something down)
Customer: But they came from here, look at the tag!
(I turn my computer screen so she can see it and I scan the socks again)
Me: See? The system won’t let me do anything. These socks definitely weren’t sold in the last 30 days.
Customer: ok I guess it was worth a shot
(Really? A single pair of old socks was worth your time? And my time? Keep in mind she didn’t seem to be the type that’s strapped for cash. Several minutes after the customer had left my manager returns to the registers with a smirk on her face.)
Manager: I just looked up that item number. Those socks were sold in 1997. For $1.89.

Unfiltered Story #104908

, | Unfiltered | February 3, 2018

Customer: I ordered to go, but I’d like to eat it here.

Me: Ok

Customer: Can I get ____ beer?

Me: Sure!

Give him the bill for his beer

Customer: This is expensive, why didn’t you tell me it was this price?

Me:….

Unfiltered Story #104893

, , | Unfiltered | February 1, 2018

While cleaning the restaurant after we have been closed for about 40 minutes, a car pulls up to the drive thru window and starts knocking on it. One of my coworkers opens the window.

Customer: “Are you guys open?”

Coworker: “No ma’am, we closed at 10 o’clock.”

Customer: “Then why are your lights on?”

Coworker: “We are working on cleaning everything.”

Customer: “You should turn your lights off so people don’t think you’re open.” *drives off*

Coworker: “…Have a good night ma’am.”

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