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One More Round Of Rudeness

, , , , , | Right | October 28, 2017

(I am at my sister’s wedding and the venue has done a really good job. Everyone has had a great time and most of us are pretty drunk. There’s only a few still left at the end of the night, including my siblings, my dad, and me. The staff are just starting to tidy up, as the party has wound down and it’s late. My dad decides to try and get a last round of drinks in before we all go to bed. Unfortunately, he can be more than a little rude when he doesn’t get what he wants.)

Dad: “Hi, can I get three beers, three gin and tonics, and four whiskeys?”

Bar Staff: “I’m sorry, sir; we’ve closed out the register for the night. We can’t sell anymore.”

Dad: “Don’t give me that! We’ve all spent a huge amount of money at this wedding today, and all we’re asking for is one last round.”

Bar Staff: “I understand, but the register is now shut down for the night, the money has been taken out, and the credit card reader has been shut down for the day’s business.”

Me: “It’s okay, bud; we understand.”

Dad: “No! It’s not okay! I’m asking politely—” *he’s not* “—for another round, after we’ve spent all this money today, feeding their wages.”

Me: “Dad, they’ve closed the register for the day, which means they physically can’t sell anymore until they open it again tomorrow. It keeps the day’s takings straight and separates business days. See?”

Dad: “I don’t care about any of that. We’ve spent so much money!”

(This goes round and round a few times. The bar manager gets involved and the whole exchange repeats itself. Eventually my dad decides to stagger off to bed.)

Dad: “I’m going to see that you get a bad review on [Video Website]. Yeah, you’ll get a bad review on [Video Website].”

(I think he meant [Review Website].)

Me: “Sorry about that, guys. Don’t listen to him; he’s pretty drunk. Listen, you guys did a great job. Everybody had a great time and you didn’t miss a beat. So, thank you!”

Bar Manager: “Thanks for saying that. We’re not allowed to sell anymore, so how about a round on the house?”

(It pays to be nice!)

This Client Is Very Labor Intensive

, , , , , , | Working | October 27, 2017

(My boss is not in the office, as his wife has gone into labor. He has asked us to let any clients know where he is and has put up an out-of-office message for his emails and his voicemail, but he is still receiving many calls from clients. He has included my number in his email, as I am his assistant and can help to direct his calls to another coworker, assist the client, or simply take a message for when he returns. One of his clients has been known to be very demanding and a bit out of touch with reality. This very client is the one who, to no surprise, causes quite the fuss over all this. He calls me and begins demanding to talk to my boss.)

Client: “I have been trying to reach [Boss] all day, but he is not responding. I need him to call me right away.”

Me: “I’m sorry. [Boss] is not in today. His wife is having a baby, so he is currently with her, and will be out for the next two weeks.”

Client: “I don’t care about that! I need him more!”

Me: “I would be happy to help you with any requests. We also have [Other Coworker with whom this client has worked with before] available to help.”

Client: “[Boss] is the only one who understands. I will only talk to him. Go get him for me and tell him I need him.”

Me: “I’m sorry. I can’t do that.”

Client: “I don’t want to have to tell [Boss] how lazy and unhelpful you are.”

Me: “Sir, forgive me for being blunt, but I cannot and will not be getting [Boss] for you, as he is currently in the hospital with his wife, who is currently in labor.”

Client: “Well, he can’t do much there, anyway, can he? She’s doing all the work. I’ll call [Other Coworker]; he’ll get [Boss] for me, I know it.”

(That coworker also refused to get [Boss], and gave the client quite an earful when the client quite literally told him to “go down to the hospital and drag him out by the ear if you have to.”)

Your Demand Can Kick The Bucket

, , , , , , | Right | October 27, 2017

(I work at a barn so that I can ride the horses there for free. Today, it’s my job to clean and bleach every bucket in the barn, which can take hours. A lady I don’t know walks up to me and just completely blows my mind about how people treat stable hands.)

Lady: “Hey, you’re doing a great job there! I have six seriously dirty buckets in my truck, and you look like you could use the extra work!”

(I laugh, because I think she’s joking, and continue cleaning. A minute or two passes and the lady comes back with, no joke, six of the grossest buckets I’ve ever seen.)

Lady: “You thought I was kidding! Get to work!”

(She smiled and walked away, so I finished my job and drove home, leaving the random woman’s dirty buckets as a surprise for her when she came back.)

Your Refund Request Is Barking Mad

, , , , | Right | October 27, 2017

(I work in the dog and cat department of a big pet store in a local mall. Probably half of our customers come in from out of town. This happens when I answer a call for my department one day.)

Me: “Thanks for holding for [Pet Store]. This is [My Name] speaking. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, I was in the store earlier today, and I bought a kennel, but the cashier also charged me for a bag of [Puppy Food].”

Me: “Oh! I’m sorry. If you could bring your receipt to the store, we’d be happy to get you a refund.”

Customer: “She also gave me the food.”

Me: “I’m sorry; did you say you have the bag of food?”

Customer: “Yeah. But I don’t want it.”

Me: “Okay. Well, if you could bring the bag of food and your receipt back to the store, we’ll get you a refund.”

Customer: “I live in [Nearby Town].”

Me: “Okay. Well, our return policy is thirty days, but if you don’t think you can make it back within that time, I can pass you on to my manager, and she can extend that window.”

Customer: “Can’t you just do the refund over the phone? I paid by debit.”

Me: “Uh… no. No, we can’t do a refund over the phone.”

Customer: “Well, why not?”

Me: “For one thing, you can’t do debit transactions over the phone, period. For another, you have the product. You need to bring the product back, and your debit card, for us to do the refund.”

Customer: “But I don’t want the dog food.”

Me: “That’s fine. You need to bring it back to the store so we can do the refund.”

Customer: “Fine.”

A Fresh Pot For A Rotten Attitude

, , , , | Right | October 27, 2017

(We mark coffee pots with the time they were put on, and rotate them so the oldest pots are served first. If a pot sits longer than 20 minutes, it’s tossed. Despite all of this, I still have this conversation every time I serve this regular.)

Regular: “I want a cup of coffee. Your freshest.”

Me: “Coming right up.”

(There are two pots that were put on at the same time, but one has slightly less because I’ve already poured a cup from it.)

Regular: “No! Not that stuff; use the other pot!”

Me: “Ma’am, they were both put on at the exact same time.”

Regular: “No, they weren’t! That one’s half-empty!”

Me: “See where I’ve written on them? They both say 12:15. I just served the customer before you a cup from this one, but they were made at the same time.”

Regular: *grumbles* “Lazy little… Just gimme my d*** coffee.”

Me: *sighs*

(Every time… eventually I decided to just shut up and serve her from the full pots. A supervisor found this out and scolded me for it. Eventually, he had to serve her, too, and apologized to me, saying I was right all along.)