Filling In Her Memory

, , , , | Healthy | July 12, 2018

(When I was a teenager I had two fillings put into separate back molars. The dentist didn’t wait until I was properly numb to do it, and both of them ended up coming out within the next few days while I was just watching TV. My family wasn’t exactly the best and didn’t believe me when I told them they came out, so I didn’t go back. Fast-forward to about a year ago. I’m out on a date, and I bite down with one of the teeth and the whole thing shatters into five pieces. I make an emergency appointment with the only dentist in town that can take me on such short notice — the dentist from before — and suffer for a day or two until I go in. When the dentist comes in and asks me why I’m there, I tell her about the tooth being shattered. She visibly rolls her eyes at my expense and takes a look, only to freeze in shock.)

Dentist: “Oh! It’s actually shattered. You know, that happens when you don’t get your cavities filled.”

Me: “I’d had it filled before, but it wasn’t done right and came out the next day. I was under eighteen, and my family wouldn’t bring me back.”

Dentist: “And you didn’t eat anything you weren’t supposed to?”

Me: “No, it wasn’t my first filling, and I followed the instructions.”

Dentist: “Well, whoever did the filling obviously didn’t know what they were doing.”

Me: “Well, you’re not too far off the mark, since you’re the one who did it.”

(She suddenly remembered me and actually looked embarrassed. She never apologized, but she was extra careful with explaining my options and giving me a crown — making sure I was properly numb this time — and when I went to pay, she’d knocked down the price a bit. This isn’t the only horrible story I have about her, but this was the last time I let her work on me. I’m glad we finally got a new practice in town and I can go somewhere else.)

Let Me Float A Question To You

, , , , | Right | July 12, 2018

(Our fast food restaurant, just like 99% of all other fast food restaurants, has three sizes of drinks. However, problems still occur.)

Me: “Hi, how are you? What would you like?”

Woman: “I’ll have [order number] and a [soda].”

Me: “All right, would that be small, a medium, or a large?”

Woman: *looks at me* “I want a [soda].”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, small, medium, or large?”

Woman: *leans over, and speaks very slowly* “I. Want. A. [Soda].”

Me: *slowly* “Yes, ma’am, I understand. Would you like that in a small size, medium size, or a large size?”

Woman: *impatient sigh* “Never mind. Get me a float.”

(Fortunately, the float only comes in one size, so I didn’t have to repeat the question a fourth time!)

Needs To Say Sorry Fifteen Times Or More

, , , | Right | July 11, 2018

(I am shopping with my girlfriend. As we head to the quick check-out, a woman with her cart full of goods slowly passes over the sign “15 items or less” and continues. My girlfriend and I are the next in line as nobody else is waiting, and an automated system calls for someone to come to the next available register. Suddenly, my girlfriend turns to me and says, pointing behind me:)

Girlfriend: “She has way more than fifteen items.”

(I turn around, and that woman is there. I gently point to the sign:)

Me: “It’s fifteen items or less only, ma’am.”

Woman: “Oh? Really? I didn’t see the sign. Sorry.”

(She turned around; and kept saying, way too many times, that she was sorry and she never saw the sign. We turned around to face the area of the registers. The guy operating the first one looked at us and raised both thumbs, mouthing, “Thank you.”)

When Life Gives You No Lemons…

, , , , , | Right | July 11, 2018

(In our store, we make lemonade from scratch — we actually juice real lemons — so when we run out of lemonade, if there is a rush, we can’t make more right away. A couple comes in. The man orders an Arnold Palmer, which is half iced tea, half lemonade. I make it, using the last of the lemonade we have.)

Me: “Here you go! Anything else?”

Man: “Nothing for me. Anything for you, sweetie?”

Woman: “Can I have a raspberry lemonade?”

Me: “I’m so sorry, but we’re out of lemonade right now; he got the last of it. Can I get you something else?”

Woman: “Um, how about a plain lemonade?”

Me: “I apologize, but we’re out of lemonade; he got the last of it in his drink.” *points to man’s drink* “Is there anything else you might want?”

Woman: *pondering hard* “Well… do you guys make frozen lemonade, you know, like a slushie?”

Me: “…”

Man: “Oh, my God.”

Woman: “What?”

Man: “They’re out of lemonade!”

Woman: “Well, she could have said something! Geez!”

The Transaction Dipped But It’s Getting Better

, , , , | Right | July 10, 2018

(I am the stupid customer in this one. On my way home from driving my wife to work, I decide to stop for food at a well-known international restaurant chain.)

Cashier: *to me as I look at the menu* “Hi there. What can I get you?”

Me: “Hi… um… Could I get a…” *glancing at menu* “…[Meal that comes with a choice of dip], please?”

Cashier: “Large?”

Me: “Please.”

Cashier: “Which drink would you like?”

Me: “Could I have a [Drink], please?”

Cashier: “And which dip?”

Me: “That’s a [Drink].”

Cashier: “Pardon? Which dip, sir?”

Me: “Oh! Sorry! I thought you said drink! Uh, no dip, please.”

(The cashier types in my order and I grin at what just happened.)

Cashier: “That’s [price], sir.”

(I reach into my pocket and get out the money.)

Me: “Wouldn’t taste nice if I dipped my food in [Drink], now, would it?”

Cashier: *laughing* “Not really, no!”

Me: “It would be a bit soggy!”

Cashier: *laughing still* “Yes, it would!”

Me: “I’ve made your day now, haven’t I?”

Cashier: “Yes, sir!” *she smiles*

Me: “Better than people coming in here swearing at you!”

Cashier: “Oh, totally!”

(I ate my meal and DIDN’T dip any of it in my drink! My head must have been elsewhere when she took my order. Still, I’m glad I could brighten up her day!)

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