Taxing Taxiing

, , , , , | Right | October 11, 2018

(I answer phones for a taxi service.)

Caller: “I’d like to go to the liquor store.”

Me: “Okay, are you ready to be picked up right now?”

Caller: “WHAT?! You’re already here and ready to pick me up right now?!”

Me: “No, no, no, no! I’m asking you what time you’d like to go to the liquor store.”

Caller: “Hehe… You’re a funny guy. You tricked me, you sneaky guy, you.”

Me: “If you’re ready to be picked up right now—”

Caller: “But I don’t see the cab.”

Me: *pause* “The cab will be over in about ten minutes.”

The Ever-Changing Cost Of Real Estate

, , | Right | October 11, 2018

(I work at a call center for a property rental company. Folks often email inquiries, then call in with follow-up questions. An older woman calls.)

Me: “Thanks for calling. How can I help you?”

Caller: “I was looking at one of your rental units online, and had some questions.”

Me: “I’d be happy to help with that! Can you help me locate which unit you were looking at?”

Caller: “It’s in [City], Florida… Pet friendly? It has two bedrooms?”

(I have literally dozens of options matching that description.)

Me: “Hm… I’m having a little trouble finding the exact unit you’re talking about—”

Caller: “I got an email from you saying it was available.”

Me: “Oh! I can look that up. What’s your email address?” *she provides it* “Thank you! Here’s the email. So, it looks like the unit is available; the cost is $1400.”

Caller: “Well, I clicked the button that said, ‘pet friendly,’ and that one popped up. And, what’s that number again? I had $1100 in my email.”

Me: “I’m sorry; I’m reading this right off the email. I’m not sure where you saw another number, but what I see is $1400.”

Caller: “I’m referencing the email titled, ‘INQUIRY FOR THE FLORIDA GETAWAY…’” *starts reading verbatim from the email, as though she’s going to prove something to me* “’…the total cost, including all taxes and fees, is $1400…’ Wait. It didn’t say that before. Why would it have changed?”

Me: “I’m sorry, that’s the email and cost I’m seeing, as well. And, reading more closely, it looks like this unit isn’t actually pet friendly, either.”

Caller: “But I clicked, ‘pet friendly.’”

Me: “I’m sorry, but this unit isn’t pet friendly.”

Caller: “Well, okay, then, I guess we’ll keep looking.”

(She ended her call. I heard her say to her husband before the line disconnected, “I just don’t know why that price changed somehow!”)

His Behavior Was Below The Branded Belt

, , , , | Right | October 10, 2018

(I get a call from the customer service desk telling me that there is a customer coming back from the service desk to men’s belts, so I go to meet the customer. He has a broken belt in his hand.)

Customer: “I need to find a belt like this. I can’t believe this! They treated me like some kind of thief! I know the manager! I can’t believe this!”

(He then looks at a few belts that are similar to the belt that he has, but they are a different brand. I take a look at the belt so I can see what brand it is. The logo looks a bit like the [Brand] logo.)

Me: “Sir? What brand is this?”

Customer: “[Brand].”

Me: “We don’t carry [Brand] here. I would try [Department Store].”

Customer: “You don’t carry [Brand]?”

Me: “No, sir.”

Customer: “Are you sure?”

Me: “Yes, sir, we don’t carry this brand. I believe [Department Store] does.”

Customer: “I knew I got it somewhere in this town. I guess I have to go back up to the service desk and apologize.”

You Get Two Explanations For The Price Of One

, , , , , | Working | October 10, 2018

(My friend and I have gone to a restaurant, which we chose specifically to try their cocktails. The waitress comes to take our order, we place orders for food and a different cocktail each, and all goes well until this:)

Waitress: “So, that’s two of that cocktail for you…” *to me* “…and two of the other cocktail for you?” *to friend*

Me: “No, we only want one cocktail each.”

Waitress: “No, it’s two cocktails for you, and two cocktails for you.”

Me: “No, one cocktail each, please.”

Waitress: “It’s two for one on cocktails. That means you get two cocktails each.”

Friend: *gives up* “I’ll have a diet coke, please.”

Waitress: “A diet coke? Okay, so one diet coke and two cocktails?”

Me: “I only want one cocktail.”

Waitress: “It’s two for one on cocktails! So, you get two cocktails of the same type for the price of one. But it only applies to cocktails of the same type. You can’t get two different cocktails for the price of one.”

Me: “Yes, we understand. So one diet coke and one cocktail, please.”

Waitress: “But it’s two for one!”

Me: “Yes, but I’d only like one. So, please, can I pay full price for one and only receive one?”

(The waitress finally leaves to place our order and it seems to be sorted… until thirty seconds later she comes back again.)

Waitress: “I checked, and it’s two for one. You get two cocktails!”

Me: “But I only want one cocktail. I want to pay that price—” *points at price on menu: £8.95* “—and get one cocktail. I don’t want a second cocktail.”

Waitress: “But it’s the same price!” *bends over to show me the screen she’s taking orders on* “See, if I click two for one, it’s £8.95, and if I click the button for individual cocktails, it’s still £8.95.” *all while adding this to our order screen*

Me: “Yes. Thank you. I understand. But I don’t want to drink two cocktails. I want to pay that price, and I only want one cocktail. Please don’t bring two cocktails. I only want one.”

(The waitress left again. Another waitress brought out the drinks — just one cocktail — and I also asked for table water, which we never received. Thankfully, everything else went well, and the bill only included one cocktail at £8.95. I was worried we’d get charged for three or four when she kept adding them on the screen. We paid without quibbling, and tipped, then left. I should have just let her bring out two and left the other untouched, but I hate waste. Seriously, though, it shouldn’t be this hard to get less for the same price from someone!)

Crazy Bad Parenting

, , , , , , | Right | October 10, 2018

(A woman is shopping with her young daughter in the cart. The woman leaves the cart parked in the main aisle and goes to look at something further down. As I walk by, the daughter stands up and starts leaning out of the basket to reach for something. The cart begins to roll in the opposite direction, and the girl is an inch away from toppling out. I grab the cart and hold it still.)

Me: “Honey, could you sit down, please? I don’t want you getting hurt.”

(Suddenly, the mother reappears and glares at me.)

Mother: “Yes, sit down. The store people get all crazy about stuff like that.” *to me* “Don’t have a heart attack. She was just looking.”

Me: *pause* “You’re welcome?”

(Yes, we “store people” don’t want your kid to get hurt, or for you to sue us if your kid does get hurt. So crazy.)

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