Fido’s Fashion Emergency

, | Right | December 11, 2009

Me: “Thank you for calling [Pet Store]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Yes, operator. Can you please connect me to [Pet Store]?”

Me: “This is [Pet Store], ma’am.”

Customer: “[Pet Store]! I NEED TO BE CONNECTED TO [Pet Store]!”

Me: “Ma’am, this is [Pet Store].”

Customer: “[Pet Store!] I NEED TO BE CONNECTED IMMEDIATELY! IT’S AN EMERGENCY!”

Me: “Ma’am, this is [Pet Store]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Oh, this is [Pet Store]? I’d like to buy a doggie sweater.”

1 Thumbs
3,564

Let’s Not Make Her A Real Angel

, , , , | Right | December 9, 2009

(A very small child of about four walks up to the slide at our pool.)

Me: “I am so sorry, sweetie, but you are a bit too small to go down the slide. Maybe next time!”

(The child leaves in hysterics, only to bring back her mother.)

Mother: “Why did you not let my angel go down the slide?”

Me: “She is under four feet tall.”

Mother: “Yes, I know. She’s an absolute angel.”

Me: “Our policy clearly states that we cannot let a child under four feet tall ride the slide. She could get seriously injured or possibly drown when she reaches the bottom.”

Mother: “Yes, I know, cute as a button!”

Me: “My manager can further explain this to you, but I can’t risk her safety.”

Mother: “But she is my angel!”

Me: “She’s also under four feet tall. She could die, ma’am.”

Mother: “Well, it’s not like she can help it! How dare you make my angel feel bad about her height!”


This story is part of our dangerous parent’s roundup! This is the last story in the roundup, but we have plenty of others you might enjoy!

23 Stories Of Truly Terrible Parent Customers

 

Read the next dangerous parent’s roundup story!

Read the dangerous parent’s roundup!

1 Thumbs
4,370

Book You In For Six (Feet Under)

, , | Right | December 2, 2009

(My boss passed away earlier this year. Her phone forwards to mine so that I can redirect individuals that need assistance.)

Customer: “Hi, can I speak to Dr. [Boss]?”

Me: “I’m sorry, Dr. [Boss] passed away earlier this year. Is there something I can help you with instead?”

Customer: “No, I think I’ll just call back. When do you think she’ll be in?”

Me: “Ma’am, she passed away.”

Customer: “Right… so when will she be in?  Can I call back tomorrow?”

Me: “Ma’am, she’s dead.”

Customer: “Oh… how about Monday, then?”


This story is part of our roundup about customers who are bad listeners!

Read the next story in the bad listening customers roundup!

Read the bad listening customers roundup!

1 Thumbs
4,445

Location Is Clearly Not Your Vocation

, , , | Right | December 2, 2009

Me: “Policyholder service. How may I help you?”

Customer: “I’d like to change the beneficiary on my policy.”

Me: “I can help you with that. Do you have your policy number?”

Customer: “No.”

Me: “That’s fine. “What is your name?”

(The customer gives me her name, but it’s common and we have several dozen policyholders with the same name. I need more information to find her policy.)

Me: “Okay. What state do you live in?”

Customer: “Springfield.”

(Unfortunately, we cannot sort or search by city names, only by states. I do a quick look and see more than one Springfield in different states.)

Me: “What state is that in?”

Customer: “Springfield.”

Me: “Springfield is the city that you’re in. What is the name of the state that you’re in?”

Customer: *slowly* “Spring. Field.”

Me: “That’s the city you’re in… What is the state?”

Customer: *annoyed* “The UNITED States!”


This story is part of our Geography roundup.

Click here to read the next story!

Click here to go to the roundup.

1 Thumbs
4,610

Driving Miss Ditzy

, , | Right | November 25, 2009

Me: “Hello, ma’am. Would you like me to take your groceries to your car?”

Customer: “…into MY car?”

Me: “Yes, I can do that for you.”

Customer: “You want a lift in my car!”

Me: “No, ma’am. I can take your groceries to your car for you and return the trolley.”

Customer: “But I still have groceries in my trolley! You can’t take my trolley yet! I’m not done!”

Me: “Ma’am, if you want to do it yourself, that’s fine.”

Customer: “Wait! I need help!”

Me: “All right, where did you park your car?”

Customer: “Hold on! Why the h*** do you need to know where my car is?”

Me: “So I can put your things in there.”

Customer: “No, this doesn’t sound right. I’m onto you!”

(The customer shuffles away with her trolley, periodically turning around to look at me suspiciously.)


This story is part of our bad driver roundup!

Read the next bad driver roundup story!

Read the bad driver roundup!

1 Thumbs
4,309