I work as an associate at a shoe store that’s going out of business. Every shoe is discounted at a different percentage depending on the type. I wrote the signs myself so I know what they say and which shoes go with each percentage.

Customer: “Um, these are supposed to be 75% off.”

Me: “Sorry, ma’am, but only heels are 75% off.”

Customer: “No, these shoes were under the 75% off sign.”

Me: “I’m sure, but there are other signs above it, too. Each sign tells you which sale applies to which type of shoe.”

Customer: “No! It doesn’t say anything like that! Let me show you.”

I go over to the sign with her and it says exactly what I said it did.

Me: “See, ma’am, it says it right here.”

Customer: “Oh… Well, no one is going to read that, hun.”

I am intersex but identify as a boy. A lot of people mistake me for a girl, despite the fact that I have short hair and a flat chest. It doesn’t help that my name is unisex and my voice is high-pitched. I work at a superstore as a cashier.

Old Man: “Thank you, [Female Version Of My Name]!”

Me: “Actually, it’s [Male Version Of My Name], but that’s okay.”

Old Man: *Stares* “Are you sure?”

Me: *Chuckles* “Yes, I’m sure.”

The old man blushes and leaves. A few days later: 

Manager: “We had a complaint about you.”

Me: “Really? What did I do?”

Manager: “A man said you called him stupid on Monday.”

Me: “No, I didn’t. He called me by [Female Version Of My Name] and I told him it’s [Male Version Of My Name]. Check the cameras if you don’t believe me.”

A couple of days later, I’m helping a woman with her items at the till. 

Woman: “Is your name [Female Version Of My Name] or [Male Version Of My Name]? I can’t tell what you are.”

Me: “It’s [Male Version Of My Name].”

Woman: “That isn’t right. You look like a girl. Your chest is flat, though, and your hair is short, so you must be one of those tomboys.”

Me: “No, ma’am, I’m not a girl. I’m a boy.”

The next day:

Manager: “We had another complaint about you. A woman said you insulted her.”

Me: “I didn’t insult anybody; I was the one insulted. Check the cameras again.”

Today, I went into work, and there’s a sign stating that “Any abuse of staff or false complaints will not be tolerated.”

This story is part of our Best Of February 2021 roundup!

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It’s been raining since early this morning. I should note that our ice cream shop has no parking spots in front of the store; it’s too small of a lot. All spots are on the sides and in the back. We cannot ask customers to move their vehicles if they park in front, and that makes it kind of hazardous for people who park in actual spots.

A customer pulls up in front of the store and gets out of her truck. She then walks up, holding a coupon.

Customer: “Hi! Can I use this coupon on sundaes?”

The customer hands a coupon over. I look over it and read aloud to her that the coupon is for small, medium, or large dishes or cones, adding that sundaes do not count for the coupon.

Customer: “Okay! Then may I please have a [Sundae with pecans] and a [Popular Kids’ Sundae]. Oh! Does the kids’ sundae work with the coupon?”

Me: “No, ma’am. This coupon can’t be used on any sundaes. Just small, regular, and large cones or dishes.”

Customer: “Aww, okay. Then I’ll have…” *Looks at our flavor board* “…two kids’ cups of [Popular PB Cup Flavor], instead of the kids’ sundae.”

At this point, I gave up on life and gave the customer her ice cream and the popular pecan sundae she’d ordered. She ordered two KIDS’ dishes. The smallest the coupon would accept was a small. Our kids’ sizes are one scoop and small is two scoops. Thankfully, the rest of the transaction was fine and she left. I was left standing there wondering how people can’t understand what their coupons allow them to get.

Related:
Any Given Sundae, Part 6
Any Given Sundae, Part 5
Any Given Sundae, Part 4
Any Given Sundae, Part 3
Any Given Sundae, Part 2

Me: “Thank you for calling [Coffee Shop] in [Mall]. How may I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, where do I cash out my lottery tickets?”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “Yeah, I got lottery tickets. Where do I cash them out?”

Me: “Well… I suppose a gas station would do it.”

Customer: “Why won’t you?”

Me: “This is [Coffee Shop]. We don’t do lottery tickets.”

Customer: “But you’re customer service at [Grocery Store]! You have to do it!”

Me: “No, ma’am. This is [Coffee Shop] in [Mall].”

Customer: *Angrily* “Well, can you transfer me to [Grocery Store] in [Nearby City]?”

Me: “No, I can’t.”

Customer: “Why?!”

Me: “Because this is [Coffee Shop] in [Mall].”

Customer: *Click*

To cut down on the time the cash office has to spend refilling the self-scan machines with change, four of our twelve machines are made permanently “card only.” Even though the self-scan warns you at the beginning and there’s a sign, we still get people who ask us why there’s no option for cash once they’ve scanned all their shopping.

It is late on a Friday night. A teenage girl around fourteen or fifteen comes up to the self-scans with her dad. The girl looks at the “card only” machine and moves to the next one that takes cash with her two items.

Dad: “Hey, why did you move to that one? This one is perfectly fine.”

Teenage Girl: “I only have change on me and that one is card only.”

Dad: “I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

Teenage Girl: *Sarcastically* “Yes, Dad, because the ‘card only’ sign is on there for fun.”

She paid at her self-scan and began to walk away. Her dad grumbled after her. My coworker and I laughed at the daughter who could read and the dad who could read and still didn’t believe what the sign was telling him!

This story is part of our Best Of February 2021 roundup!

Read the next Best Of February 2021 roundup story!

Read the Best Of February 2021 roundup!