Shaking Things Up With Your Order

, , , , , | Working | March 7, 2018

(I only live a few minutes away from my work, so I stop there frequently for a bite to eat. The previous night, when I was working, the machine that handles all of the mochas, lattes, etc., was broken, so I keep that in mind when I find a coupon with a deal giving you a free coffee drink when you buy a big sandwich. After I pull up to the speaker and get the greeting…)

Me: “Is your coffee machine working?”

Coworker: “Yes.”

Me: “Okay, I’d like to get [sandwich] and a mint mocha.”

(I get the total, pay at the first window, and go to the second window to get my food. I get my sandwich, but when my second coworker hands me my drink…)

Me: “Uh, I asked for a mint mocha, not a mint shake.”

(My second coworker looks a little confused, and the shift manager comes over to see what the deal is.)

Me: “I asked for a mocha, not a shake.” *holds up the wrong drink*

Manager: “Oh, the machine is broken.”

Me: “I even asked if it was working before I ordered.”

Manager: “I don’t have the smartest people on my shift today.” *walks away*

(I drove home with my correct sandwich and incorrect drink, still a little confused. I went to the survey website and gave my two cents about my experience, but I really couldn’t get too annoyed, as it was a free drink.)

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“Cute” Can’t Sell Carpets

, , , , , | Working | March 7, 2018

(Sacramento is pretty LGBT-friendly and the community I live in is somewhat known for LGBT couples. I, however, am a heterosexual cis female homeowner. One day a rather cutely-dressed girl rings my doorbell. She starts a sales pitch for a carpet-cleaning service. I try to let door-to-door salespeople down easy. I gesture to the floor she can see, which is a vinyl plank floor that looks like wood.)

Me: “Sorry, I don’t have any carpeting. Thanks.”

Salesgirl: “Oh, we don’t do just carpeting.”

(She then begins the sales pitch for furniture cleaning. And now I’m done. I cut into her speech.)

Me: “No, thanks.”

(She continues to try at another angle, listing other items for cleaning.)

Me: “No. Thank you.”

(I go to shut the door on her. She strikes a pose and pouts.)

Salesgirl: “But don’t you think I’m cute?”

(I’m floored. I’m completely dumbstruck.)

Me: “Yes, but no, thanks.”

(I did think she was a cute girl, but just because she’s cute doesn’t mean I’m going to buy a floor cleaning service!)

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The Adventures Of Parolyn

, , , | Right | March 7, 2018

(I work at a call center for a large health insurance company. My name, Carolyn, can sometimes be misunderstood, but it is close enough I don’t always correct the callers.)

Me: “Thank you for calling customer service. My name is Carolyn.”

Caller: “Karen?”

Me: “No, Carolyn”

Caller: “Marilyn?”

Me: “No my name is Carolyn.”

Caller: “Parolyn?”

Me: “No, Carolyn. C-A-R-O-L-Y-N.”

Caller: “Oh, Gary Ann.”

Me: *facepalm*

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Blame Canada! Part 7

, , , , , , | Right | March 6, 2018

(I work at a clothing store in Canada that’s fairly popular in the USA, too. We get a fair amount of American customers, as well. Each country has a different version of the website and different sales. One afternoon, two women approach me at the cash with their shopping and I quickly begin ringing them up.)

Customer #1: “Oh! Those jeans aren’t the right price.”

Me: “Oh, that’s no good. Did the sale sign in the section say something different?” *thinking it’s a signing error*

Customer #2: “No, no, it’s the website price that’s different.”

(She then pulls out her phone to show me the website. I can see from the web address that she’s looking at the American website.)

Me: “Miss, that’s the wrong website; also, we don’t price match to our web prices.”

Customer #1: “What do you mean? We’re at the [Store] website!”

Me: “Miss, you’re in Canada, and even if you were using the Canadian website, I still can’t price match the jeans to that price. If you want the jeans at that price, you’ll have to buy them in the States.”

Customer #2: “But we’re American! I want to pay the American prices with American money!”

Me: “Then, please, go back to the States and purchase the jeans there. While you’re in Canada, you have to pay the Canadian prices. I’m sorry.”

(They left in a huff and I thankfully didn’t see them for the rest of my shift.)

Related:
Blame Canada!
Blame Canada! (Day)
Blame Canada!

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Will Have To Shop Around For Some More Shopping

, , , , , | Working | March 6, 2018

(I work for a supermarket in the home delivery department. I have spent the last week and a half acting up into a role of team support. My job is to support drivers while they are on the road, and to communicate with the customer service team regarding the status of orders. Sometimes we have orders that are “stored,” which means that, for whatever reason, payment has been unsuccessful. At these times, we call the customer to try and sort the payment out. If the customer does not answer, we leave a voicemail and arrange for an email to be sent. In very rare circumstances, customers don’t get their shopping and call customer service to find out where it is. More often than not, this is after the delivery window, and the shopping is returned to stock. This leads to the following conversation with customer service.)

Employee: “Hi there. It’s [Employee] from customer service. I’m trying to track down a customer’s order.”

(After we establish who the customer is and I explain that the order was stored, this conversation happens without fail.)

Employee: “Is there any chance if the customer pays that we could get their shopping out to them?”

Me: “No, sorry. That’s not possible; the transaction has expired and we can’t access it anymore to take payment.”

Employee: “But what if we could get them to pay? Can we get the shopping out to them?”

Me: “No. There is no possible way for them to pay; they have to reorder. The transaction has been closed; we would have no way to take payment. The shopping has been returned to stock.”

Employee: “Well, we really need to make this customer happy, so can we not take payment?”

Me: “We have no means to process that. I can’t do the impossible.”

Employee: “Well, I’ll just have to phone your store manager to confirm this.”

Me: “Uh, okay. Fine.”

(Every time, the store manager comes in and checks that 1) the transaction has expired and 2) the shopping is returned to stock, and then tells customer service this. Customer service then explains that they promised to get this shopping to the customer that day and that we need to make it happen. The manager refuses and tells customer service not to promise things like that next time. This happens far more than it should.)

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