A Fee-ble Excuse

, , , , | Right | February 7, 2018

(I work in the support department of a webhotel provider, answering the phones. I take a call from a customer who is calling in because his website has been suspended due to lack of payment.)

Me: “You have reached [Provider], [My Name] speaking.”

Customer: “Yes, hello. My site has been suspended, and I need to get it re-opened.”

Me: “Certainly, sir. What is the name of your site?”

Customer: “It’s [domain].”

(I look up the customer’s account in our system.)

Me: “Ah, yes. I can see that you have missed paying for the renewal of your webhotel.”

Customer: “I know; that’s what it says when I load my site. Can you please send me the invoice, so I can pay it?”

Me: “We have already sent it to you. I can see in our records that we have sent several reminders to you by email over the last few months before suspending your site.”

Customer: “Oh, yes. I saw those, but I thought they were scam emails, so I didn’t read them.”

(The customer opens his email and I direct him to click the invoice link.)

Customer: “Wait. There’s a late fee on here. I’m not paying that. You didn’t send me my invoice on time. You usually send it as a regular letter.”

Me: “We used to send a letter alongside the emails before, yes, but we have gotten a new system since then, so we are no longer able to do that. Still, we have sent the invoice to you several times via email. You have no excuse not to have seen it.”

Customer: “I work in security, so I know people can send fake emails. That’s why I always assume the emails I receive from you are scam mails, just using your logo. I work with physical security, so I don’t know any of that online stuff.”

(At this point, I give the customer a detailed explanation of how he can tell a potential scam email apart from the official emails we send, by checking that the invoice link points to our domain. He is still insistent that it is our fault he didn’t pay on time because we didn’t send him a letter, even though he totally ignores the emails we send him without even opening them.)

Customer: “Fine, I’ll pay the late fee, since it’s apparently so important to you, but I’m not happy with your level of customer service.”

(Apparently it is unreasonable for a webhotel provider to communicate purely via email.)

Not Getting A Good Reading Here

, , , , , , | Right | February 7, 2018

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but that is the coupon for next week. Do you have the second half of this flyer, for this week’s coupon?”

Customer: *as loud as she can* “YOU NEED A F****** LAW DEGREE TO UNDERSTAND EXPIRATION DATES THESE DAYS!”

Me: “Beg your pardon? The date is written in the standard format, right here.” *points to dates on coupon*

Customer: “Like, you expect me to actually read the coupon?!”

There Is Such A Thing As Too Early

, , , , , | Working | February 6, 2018

(I walk into the store after I finish my break and see a teenage girl sitting on a couch with no associate helping her.)

Me: “Hello. How can I help you today?”

Girl: “Oh, I’m not a customer. I’m waiting for my interview.”

Me: “Oh! Hi, I’m [My Name], the manager. What’s your name? I don’t remember having an interview set for 1:30. Are you sure you’re here for the right date?”

Girl: “Oh, no. My interview is at 2:30, but I was worried about being late for this, so I came a little early.”

Me: “Oh… Well, why don’t you hang out in the food court, get some coffee or food, and then come back five minutes before 2:30?”

Girl: “Oh, no, thanks. I ate before I came and I don’t like coffee.”

Me: “So, you’re just going to wait here for an hour?”

Girl: “Yup! It’ll be a good opportunity to see how the store is run.”

Me: “Okay.”

(I got to work and the girl sat there on her cell phone for the next hour. So much for “watching how the store works.” Tip for job seekers: come ten to fifteen minutes early for an interview. Anything more makes the manager feel rushed to get to you and just doesn’t leave a good first impression.)

Doesn’t Have 20/20 Delivery

, , , | Working | February 5, 2018

(I’m at home when the doorbell rings unexpectedly. It’s a pizza delivery driver. I haven’t ordered pizza.)

Driver: “Your pizza!”

Me: “I didn’t order pizza.”

Driver: “This is number 20, right?”

Me: “Yes.”

Driver: “So, it’s your pizza.”

Me: “I didn’t order any; it’s not for me.”

Driver: “20 [Address] Street?”

Me: “Sorry, this is [Address] Road. [Address] Street is the first on the left there.”

Driver: “You’re number 20?”

Me: “No, you’re on the wrong road. Take the first on the left.”

Driver: “You are number 20, see?”

(He points at the number by my door.)

Me: “Yes, but this is the wrong road. Sorry.”

Driver: “Is something wrong? Why don’t you want your pizza?”

Me: “It’s not my pizza! This is the wrong house!”

Driver: “Number 20, right?”

(I shut the door. A couple of seconds later, he rings the bell again, holding it down for at least 30 seconds until I open the door again.)

Driver: “You must take your pizza! I have more deliveries to do.”

Me: “It is not my pizza. You are at the wrong house.”

(He thrust the pizza into my hands and got back into his car. I walked the 30 seconds around the corner and gave the pizza to the people who’d ordered it. We do sometimes get deliveries for [Address] Street, but I’ve never had a driver refuse to admit they’re wrong before!)

Stop And Think For A Period

, , , | Healthy | February 5, 2018

(In Australia, purchasing certain medications requires the cashier, by law, to ascertain for whom the medication is intended and whether or not they’ve used the medication before. It’s about half an hour before closing time and it’s been a busy day, so I’m running on autopilot, when a man comes up to the counter.)

Male Customer: “Can I have some [period pain medication], please?”

Me: “Sure. That’s just for yourself, and you’ve used it before?”

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