Strawberry Fields Forever

| MI, USA | Extra Stupid, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

(I am ordering ice-cream for my family and me.)

Cashier: “What can I get for you?”

Me: “I’ll have a scoop of strawberry, please.”

Cashier: “Sorry, we only have chocolate, vanilla, and butter pecan today.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry! Chocolate, then.”

Cashier: “Alright, anything else?”

Dad: “I’ll have a strawberry shake.”

Cashier: “Sorry, we only have chocolate, vanilla, and butter pecan.”

Dad: “Oh right, a chocolate shake then.”

Sister: “I want a strawberry sundae!”

Cashier: “We only have chocolate, vanilla, and butter pecan.”

Sister: “Okay, vanilla.”

Me: “Does that happen a lot?”

Cashier: “Often enough that I look forward to the days we actually have strawberry.”

Just Plain Nuts

| Panama City Beach, FL, USA | Food & Drink, Health & Body, Top

Customer: “So, does the Rocky Road have peanuts in it? I’m allergic to peanuts.”

Me: “I’m afraid it does, sir. I’d recommend the Cookie Dough; it’s very good.”

Customer: “No, no, I’ve had that before. Thanks for telling me about the Rocky Road though. Allergies, you know?”

Me: “Yes, sir, my friend is very allergic to peanuts, too.”

Customer: “You’re such a nice girl. All right, I think I’ll have vanilla with the peanut butter candy on top.”

Me: “Sir? Um… the candy has p—”

Customer: “Look, kiddo, you were a big help but gimme my darn ice cream, okay? I’m in a bit of a hurry!”

Me: “Sir, you just told me you had a peanut allergy. I can’t in good conscience give you that topping.”

Customer: “You’re a teenager. You don’t have a conscience! You’re probably waiting for your boyfriend to show up so you can have sex and do drugs!”

Me: *dumbstruck*

Other Customer: “Hey, jerkface, she’s trying to tell you that the candy has peanuts in it! For not having a conscience, she’s being pretty nice about keeping you out of the hospital!”

Customer: *leaves in a huff*

Other Customer: “I’m not allergic to peanuts or delusional. One Rocky Road!”

Size Matters, Part 6

| San Francisco, CA, USA | Food & Drink, Top

(A lady and her daughter walk in.)

Me: “Hi, how may I help you?”

Daughter: “Can I have the waffle cone with a scoop of coconut ice cream?”

Me: “Yeah, sure. Here you go.” *hands over ice cream*

Customer: “What sizes do you have for snow cones?”

Me: “I have a $2 cup and a $2.50 cup.” *shows her sizes*

Customer: “Do you have a $1.50 cup?”

Me: “No, I have $2 and $2.50.”

Customer: “Okay, I’ll have one exactly like my daughter’s.”

Me: “A $2 coconut waffle cone?”

Customer: “No, I want it in a cup…and make it strawberry.”

Me: “So, not exactly like hers.”

Customer: “No, I guess not. Wait…never mind. I’ll have a small snow cone.”

Me: “Okay, what flavor?”

Customer: “I’ll have the strawberry.”

Me: “Okay. There you go.” *hands over the small strawberry snow cone*

Customer: “Oh, you made it small? When I said small, I meant big! I thought you would understand.”

Me: “No. You said small, so I gave you small.”

Customer: “Well, I wanted the large one, but it’s okay. It was your mistake.”

Related:
Size Matters, Part 5
Size Matters, Part 4
Size Matters, Part 3
Size Matters, Part 2
Size Matters