The Worst Job You Never Had

, , , , | Right | May 10, 2011

(I’m a customer at a supermarket, but I’m still wearing my work uniform since I’m buying things for my job. My clothing doesn’t look anything like the uniform that the supermarket employees wear. Another customer approaches me.)

Customer: “Love, can you show me where the ice is?”

Me: “Sorry, ma’am. I’m not sure where the ice is. It’s probably down at the freezer section.”

Customer: “Can you take me down there?”

Me: “Sorry, I have to buy this and get back to work. The freezer section is just over there. ”

Customer: “Well, you’re not being very helpful. I’m going to tell your boss about this.”

(She runs off to find a manager. It takes me awhile to realise that she thinks I work here.)

Customer: “There she is! The rude one!”

(The manager looks at me and immediately realizes what has happened.)

Customer: “You should fire her for being so rude to me!”

(The manager shakes his head and beckons me over.)

Manager: *whispers to me* “Just go with it.”

(I nod and he begins to ‘fire’ me in front of the customer, who looks satisfied. Eventually, someone who does work there gets her her ice and she leaves.)

Manager: “Sorry about that. She does this every time she comes in.”

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I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 3

, , , | Right | January 5, 2011

(I am a customer.)

Fellow Customer: *heavily accented* “Excuse me. Where are the pipe cleaners?”

Me: “Sorry, sir, I don’t work here. I have no idea.”

(He moves off to meet with two others, who have a conversation. I move on, when another from the group approaches me.)

Fellow Customer #2: “Hi. Where are your pipe cleaners?”

Me: “I don’t know. I don’t work here.”

Fellow Customer #2: “Oh.” *long pause* “I want green ones.”

Me: “I’m sorry, I meant I don’t work here. I’m also shopping.”

(He walks back to his group, who have another hushed conversation. The third person comes over. By now, a fourth customer is watching with amusement.)

Fellow Customer #3: “I’m sorry, they’re new to America and don’t follow much English.”

Me: “That’s all right.”

Fellow Customer #3: “We can’t find those long green–”

Me: “No, I don’t work here. I’m just shopping here, too.”

Fellow Customer #3: “Oh, all right. You just seemed to know where you were going. Sorry to bother you.”

(He and his friends leave to find someone in the dark blue of the store’s uniform.)

Other Customer: “Wow. Took them long enough!”

Me: *laughing a little* “Yeah, I guess I’m still in work-mode.”

Other Customer: “So, where is your yarn?”


This story is part of our Bad-Listener Customers roundup!

Read the next Bad-Listener Customers roundup story!

Read the Bad-Listener Customers roundup!

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I Don’t Work Here Does Not Work Here, Part 2

, , , , , , | Right | October 28, 2010

(I am shopping at a retail store where employees don’t wear uniforms, but encourage their sales associates to wear clothes purchased from their store. I’ve picked up a shirt from a stack of folded clothes, looked at it, and folded it again. A woman comes up to me holding a scarf.)

Customer: “Do you have this in blue? I saw it in blue last week but now I can’t find it.”

Me: “Oh, I don’t work here. But I think I just saw a salesperson over there.”

Customer: “Don’t lie to me! I know you work here. I just saw you fold that shirt! If you can’t be bothered to help me, call someone else on your little radio or something. But don’t lie to me; I’m not stupid! Use your radio and find me a blue scarf!”

Me: “Listen, I don’t know what else I can tell you. I don’t have a radio to call someone as I do not work here.”

Customer: “Just stop it already! Someone needs to teach you how to treat customers with respect. Of course you work here; you are wearing clothes from the d*** store! I’m not stupid! Where is your manager?”

(I decide to ignore her and continue about my business. A couple of minutes later I hear a now familiar voice.)

Customer: “That girl right there. She didn’t want to help me, so she just pretended she didn’t work here.”

(I turn around and see the woman standing behind me with the store manager.)

Manager: “Ma’am, this lady doesn’t work here. She is just a shopper like you.”

Customer: “But… she is wearing clothes from this store!”

Manager: *looking at me apologetically as I’m trying hard not to laugh* “A lot of people wear clothes from this store, ma’am. That’s the whole point of buying them. Our employees all wear a name tag; that’s how you can tell them apart from customers.”

Customer: “I think you are just covering for your employee because you know she messed up. This is unbelievable! I just wanted this scarf in blue! I am never shopping here again!”

(She turns around to leave. As she storms out, she spots another customer and yells at her.)

Customer: “I suppose you don’t work here either, huh?!”

Other Customer: *without batting an eye* “Nope. But I have that scarf in blue, and let me tell you; it’s gorgeous!”

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The Funny Pharm-acy

, , , , | Right | December 22, 2009

(I work in a shopping mall. On my lunch break, I visit the pharmacy. A woman runs into me.)

Customer: “You! Where do you keep your toilet paper?”

Me: “In my cupboard.”

Customer: “How dare you talk to me that way! I want to talk to your manager!”

Me: “I’m sorry, I don’t work here.”

Customer: “Oh, so now you’re going to get into trouble, it’s ‘I don’t work here,’ eh?”

Me: *pointing to the company logo on my shirt* “No, I genuinely do not work here. I work in [Shop], see?”

Customer: “So, you don’t wear your uniform either? Where’s your manager?” *turns to make-up counter employee* “Are you her manager, missy?”

Make-Up Counter Employee: “Yes. Yes, I am.” *turns to me, winking* “Don’t do that again.”

Customer: “Thank you! See, now I can shop here again!” *to make-up counter employee* “You! Where do you keep your toilet paper?”


This story is part of our roundup about customers who refuse to listen! This is the last story in the roundup, but we have plenty of others you might enjoy!

23 Crazy Stories About Customers Who Struggle With Reading And Comprehension

 

Read the first story in the bad listening customers roundup!

Read the bad listening customers roundup!

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