Age Is Just A Number; Maturity Is Everything

, , , , , | Friendly | June 15, 2020

My family — my husband, our three-year-old son, and me — are flying across Canada to visit extended family. We were able to upgrade our seats to first-class for a really reasonable rate at the last minute. We’ve got a big bag of stuff to keep our son entertained on the flight. We know; babies and little kids are not always the best travellers.

We get settled in and another family boards right after us. The parents are in their fifties or so, and their three kids are in their twenties. They take one look at my son, who’s sitting quietly while I read him a book, and start complaining. Loudly. They’re saying things like, “Oh, great! I thought this was supposed to be first-class!” They’re trying to engage the other first-class passengers, who are mostly looking uncomfortable that we can clearly hear these people complaining about us.

As soon as the plane takes off, this other family starts ordering drinks. And more drinks. First, they start talking and joking in increasingly loud voices. Then, they start bickering, shouting across the aisles at each other. They are the noisiest passengers I’ve ever been stuck with. 

Our three-year-old son, meanwhile, was quiet and calm the whole flight. He watched cartoons, ate snacks, and played with his toys. Model flyer.


This story has been included in our June 2020 roundup as one of that month’s most memorable stories!

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It’s Not Sexist If It Results In Cookies!

, , , , , , , | Related | June 13, 2020

My boyfriend and I are both avid nerds — we met at a convention — and one of our favorite things to do together is cosplay, with him doing most of the prop-building and me doing most of the sewing.

As such, I’m delighted one year when he gets me a heavy-duty industrial steam iron for Christmas, as well as a gift card for my favorite fabric shop. When I’m talking about this at the family Christmas party, my sister is considerably less impressed.

Sister: “He got you an iron? How sexist can you get?”

Me: “Yeah, a really nice one that I probably wouldn’t have bought for myself, so we can get a cleaner finish on costume pieces. It’s a useful tool for a hobby I enjoy; what’s wrong with that?”

Sister: “It’s degrading! He expects you to iron his shirts for him?!”

Me: “Nah, I’ll be ironing cloaks and surcoats and costume pieces.”

Sister: “Same difference!”

Me: “Didn’t [Her Husband] get you a set of those Silpat baking mats for Christmas?”

Sister: “Yeah, I’m so excited to try baking with them! Why, what’s your point?”

Me: *Pause* “Nothing. Nothing at all.”


This story has been included in our June 2020 roundup as one of that month’s most memorable stories!

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Truly Vile Customers Are A Cancer

, , , , | Right | May 17, 2020

I work at a large big box store. It’s early in the morning, and we aren’t terribly busy yet. I notice one customer avoiding another register to come to mine. As I’m checking him out, I discover this isn’t a coincidence as he starts to badmouth a few of my coworkers.

Customer: “I really didn’t want her to ring me up. She has a terrible attitude.”

I look to see who he’s talking about. The coworker in question is known for her exuberance and enthusiastic attitude, even if she pushes the store credit card pretty hard.

Me: “I’m sorry you feel that way.”

Customer: “Yeah, if I heard she had cancer, I would just laugh so hard.”

He goes on in this vein for a while, and I simply try to ring him up and get him out. To make this worse, I actually know the coworker has health issues and will be taking some time off for them soon. Finally, he’s done and leaves. I turn to the next customer.

Second Customer: “And he’s complaining about someone else’s attitude?”

Me: “I wasn’t going to say anything.”

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Collies Without Borders

, , , , , , | Related | February 7, 2020

(My family is gathered at my house and we are attempting to watch television together. Originally, I am seated in the middle of the couch between my sister and my mother, while my uncle is seated across the room from me. Said uncle has a habit of quickly grabbing the remote and slowly remembering that he has no clue how to work my equipment, so I stand to get the remote and get the game on. Almost instantly, my border collie jumps up and takes my spot without invitation.)

Me: “Get off.”

Mother: “You can just sit over there.” *points to a different seat*

Me: “Not the point. No one invited her up. She shouldn’t be on the couch unless she’s called.”

Sister: *as she starts rubbing my dog* “It’s fine! Just leave her be!”

Me: “It’s not fine. She’s a big dog. If she doesn’t learn obedience, bad things will happen.” *back to my dog* “Off!”

(Despite her love of being rubbed, my dog takes the command and climbs off the couch to lay down beside it.)

Sister: “You are such a bully.”

Me: “When you get your own dog, raise it your way. This is my dog, so I’ll raise it my way.”

(With that out of the way, I go back to working on the television. Before I can finish, my sister glances out the window and notices my neighbors’ daughter has come to visit. As she is friends with said daughter but they don’t get to see each other much due to college, my sister pops out to say hi and catch up. It is also worth noting that my neighbors have a Papillon. On her return, my sister groans.)

Sister: “[Neighbors] have to do something about [Papillion]! He is completely out of control! Doesn’t listen to one thing anyone says! Why can’t he be more like [Border Collie]?”

Me: *facepalm*

(Despite my numerous efforts to explain it, she has still yet to figure out my “bullying” is how to get an obedient dog and still objects to how strict I am with my border collie.)

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Has Some Baggage Over The Bagging

, , , , , | Right | January 23, 2020

(I work at a “budget” grocery store, where customers are expected to bag their own items. My customer and I bond over the fact that she works as a cashier at [Way More Expensive Grocery Store] and we casually make fun of bad customers as I ring her up.)

Customer: “Yeah, customers can be awful. But, I mean, you know, at least at [Expensive Store] we actually do our jobs and bag groceries, unlike here where they don’t understand customer service.”

(Her tone has quickly switched from happy and friendly to quite nasty, and I’m rather taken aback at the change.)

Me: “I… I’m sorry?”

Customer: “Yeah. We just work way harder than you. You just stand there.”

Me: “I can assure you, ma’am, we work very hard here.”

Customer: “Not as hard as we work at [Expensive Store]. I actually do more than stand around and scan things. It’s just ridiculous that we have to bag our own things! It’s not right! We’d never treat a customer like that at [Expensive Store]!”

Me: “That’s not really called for. We all work hard here, and—”

Customer: “Ridiculous!”

Me: “I’m sorry you’re frustrated, but not paying for baggers is how we keep our prices so low. [Expensive Store] is almost twice the price for almost everything, and their prices are higher specifically because they have more luxuries, like paying to have enough staff on hand that you have time to bag between customers.”

Customer: “Oh, my God, I looooove how cheap you guys are compared to [Expensive Store], nowhere near as expensive as my work. That’s why I love coming here! You just need to learn to do your job properly and bag things!”

Me: *sigh*

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