Behaving Like An Old Bag

, , , , | Right | November 21, 2018

(I work as a banquet server in a hotel. We often do conference-style buffets, meaning we set everything up and then need to bus the tables as quickly as possible before the meeting starts. Upon passing one of the guests I notice a napkin and a used tea bag on her plate, which is slightly pushed away. Naturally, I attempt to clear it, and apparently, my coworker tried to do the same thing just minutes before.)

Lady: “What do you think you’re doing?”

Me: “Oh, I am so sorry, ma’am; I thought you were done.”

Lady: “DON’T YOU TOUCH MY PLATE!” *scowl* “And get me your manager, now!

Me: “Sure, right away, ma’am.”

Manager: “How may I help you?”

Lady: “The one with glasses—” *my coworker* “—and the skinny, [race] one—” *me* “—were trying to clear my plate while I WASN’T DONE WITH IT YET! I want them both fired!”

(She goes on a long rant about incompetent servers.)

Manager: “Okay, ma’am, I will talk to them.”

(We explained our side of the story. The manager just laughed and said that of course we were in no trouble whatsoever, since we did nothing wrong. Instead, he recounted the events to the party contact, who also happened to be the lady’s boss. She was appalled at her employee’s behavior and told him they would have a talk. I also proceeded to inform the rest of the servers about the lady, and we all agreed to stay as far away from her as possible during the next course, meaning that everyone’s plates got cleared except hers. The last thing I heard from her before bidding farewell to the entire group was more grumbling about “lazy servers who can’t even clear a plate.”)

Has No Shuttle Rebuttal

, , , | Right | November 21, 2018

(I work in a hotel. Our shuttle service is pretty simple to understand. It’s first-come, first-served, so if the shuttle isn’t there, it’ll be back in about ten minutes. Most people understand this simple concept, but there are always some special minds that don’t.)

Customer: “Where is the shuttle?”

Me: “Oh, it just left with someone, so it’ll be back in ten minutes.”

Customer: “Oh, no! I have to get to work!”

Me: “Sorry, the only other option is a taxi, but they also take ten minutes to get here.”

(A few minutes pass.)

Customer: *pacing and sighing loudly* “Where is the shuttle?! This is horrible; I have to get to work! I’ll be late!”

Me: “Usually what people do is get up earlier…”

Customer: *death glare*

(She later wrote a complaint that I was rude for telling the truth. They all do.)

Unfiltered Story #127471

, | Unfiltered | November 17, 2018

(An angry man comes storming in.)

Man: “What is your rate!”

Me: “It’s [rate], but we don’t have any rooms left.”

Man: *banging fists* ” WHAT?! NO MORE ROOMS?!”

Me: “Yes.”

Man: *tries to stare me down*

Me: *staring right back*

Man: “…Gimme your name!”

Me: “My name is [Name].”

Man: “Your last name too!”

Me: “You don’t need to know that, sir.”

Man: “Give it now! I NEED it when I report you to customer complaint hotline! Oh, and give me the number!”

Me: “Oh I see. In that case, nope.”

(He lingers a while longer, muttering threats, then storms off. What a hothead.)

Unfiltered Story #127464

, , | Unfiltered | November 16, 2018

I work the front desk at an exterior corridor hotel. I received the following telephone call

Me: “Thank you for calling [hotel], this is [name] speaking how may I help you?”

Guest: “Hi, my husband and I booked a room at your hotel and I would like to request you put us on the ground floor since we have difficulty walking up steps”

Me: “Sure thing, I would be happy to make that change for you. However we do have an elevator so that you would not need to hike up the steps”

Guest: “Oh. But your rooms are on the outside, right?

Me: “Yes ma’am that is correct”

Guest: “Then how could I take the elevator up to my room?”

Me:” ..I’m sorry?”

Guest: “If the rooms are outside,then how would I get to my room from the elevator?”

Me: “The elevator takes you up to the walkways on the 2nd and 3rd floors”

Guest: *intelligible grunt as if she does not understand*

Me: “The elevator is outside, just like the rooms, and it will take you up to the walkways”

Guest: “The elevator is outside? Oh! What a great idea! I’ve never heard of that before! Okay thank you!” *hangs up*

Me: “….”

Pulling A Queen From Your A**

, , , , | Right | November 15, 2018

(I work nights at a hotel and am pretty used to the random types of people we get. This night I am sitting in the back office behind the lobby counter. We have an arcade right next to the lobby.)

Coworker: “There’s a couple of hookers with two guys, and they want to play pool.”

(I go to the side of the counter and look at the window’s reflection to see four people hanging out around the pool table. One of the girls is digging through her purse for change and the other looks like she is picking a wedgie when…)

Wedgie Girl: “I found a 20-dollar Canadian bill in my butthole!”

(I laughed so hard I had to go into the back and wipe the tears from my eyes.)

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