Bellowing, Not Belling

| MN, USA | Crazy Requests, Hotels & Lodging

(I work at the front desk of a large resort in a small town. This is late at night so I am in the back room working on some nightly tasks. I have set the bell out on the counter in case a guest comes and I don’t see them.)

Guest: “HELLOOO!”

Me: “Hello! How can I help you?”

Guest: “I just want to get checked in! I have been waiting here for five minutes!”

Me: “Oh, I am very sorry about that! Can I just get your last—”

Guest: “I demand to speak to a manager about having to wait! That is ridiculous!”

(I call the night manager up from helping another guest.)

Manager: “How can I help you?”

Guest: “This girl kept me waiting out here for five minutes before helping me!”

Manager: *to me* “Is this true?”

Guest: “Yes, it’s true! She didn’t even notice me!”

Manager: “And you tried ringing the bell?”

Guest: “Well, of course not!”

Manager: “May I ask why not?”

Guest: “Well, that would have been rude!”

Need To Go Quebec And Get Her

| Montreal, QC, Canada | Hotels & Lodging

(It is 7:15 am when the phone rings.)

Me: “Front desk?”

(A female guest in her 40s with a British accent answers:)

Guest: “I need to make a local call. How much do you charge?”

Me: “Local calls are free!”

Guest: “Great! How do I make a local call?”

Me: “Dial eight, and then the number you need.”

Guest: “The number starts with 649. Is that what all local numbers start with?”

Me: “Um, the number should start with either 438 or 514 for most local numbers.”

Guest: “Well, I need to call my mother at the Best Western… Oh wait, here is says 1-418-649—”

Me: “Uh, 418 is to call Quebec City and the surrounding area. Are you sure you have the right hotel?”

Guest: “Yes… Best Western City Centre, on Rue de la Courone.”

Me: “That is in Quebec City. Quebec City will be a long distance phone call, so there will be a charge of 0.75$/min.”

Guest: “Wait, WHAT?! I THOUGHT WE WERE IN QUEBEC CITY! WHERE ARE WE? DID THEY SEND HER TO A DIFFERENT STATE OR SOMETHING?”

Me: “You are in Montreal. Quebec City is still in the same province, but it is about 2.5 hours away…”

Guest: “MY MOTHER IS 2.5 HOURS AWAY?! OH, MY GOD! OH, MY GOD! OH, MY–”  *click*

All Smoke, No Mirrors

| Chicago, IL, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Hotels & Lodging, Technology

(A guest I checked in less than two hours ago is walking up to the front desk with all her luggage, ready to leave.)

Me: “How may I help you?”

Guest: “I want to check out!”

Me: “Is everything all right? I see you are checking out early.”

Guest: “I don’t want to talk about it; I want a receipt stating that I have a zero balance.”

Me: “All right, one moment. Let me get your receipt out of the back. My printer is down.”

(I come back a few seconds later with her receipt.)

Me: “Are you sure everything is all right? You seem upset and I don’t want you leaving upset.”

Guest: “Yes, actually, you can tell your people I do not appreciate them recording me while I am sleeping!”

Me: “I’m sorry, what do you mean?”

Guest: “There was a little red light flashing above my bed!”

Me: “Oh! You mean the smoke detector. That isn’t a recording device.”

Guest: “You don’t think I know the difference between a smoke detector and a recording device?! I know that if there is a blinking red that means the camera is on and recording! So please delete any footage you have of me.”

Me: “Ma’am, I am really sorry. I promise you we do not have recording devices in our guests rooms. It honestly was a smoke detector.”

Guest: “IT WAS NOT A SMOKE DETECTOR!”