Me: “No, sorry we don’t take that coupon.”

Customer: “But [Other Hotel] said you did!”

Me: “Really…?”

Customer: “I demand my taxi be paid for giving me false info!”

(We’re not supposed to pay for taxis, but the man starts throwing a temper tantrum and making a big scene, so I decide to, just to get him to leave. Finally, he does, and I call the Other Hotel.)

Me: “Did you tell some crazy man that we accept coupons?!”

Other Hotel: “Yes we did!”

Me: “Well don’t! We don’t accept them!”

Other Hotel: “Sorrrrry.” *hangs up*

(At least he was telling the truth, so I hadn’t rewarded a liar, but still.)

(I’m the bad customer in this story, although I honestly didn’t mean to be. My fiancé and I were planning our wedding. We wanted to have an afternoon reception with wine and hors d’oeuvres, so we called a local hotel that had a good reputation for that sort of thing.)

Hotel Employee: If you like, you can come sample some of our food and see what appeals to you.
Me: That sounds wonderful!
Hotel Employee: Good! (*arranges a date and time*) Oh, one more thing – how many people are in your wedding party?
Me: (thinking “I have no idea why you’re asking me that”) There will be me, my fiancé, my matron of honour, and the best man.
Hotel Employee: Great! See you on (date)!

(When the date came, my fiancé and I arrived at the hotel and were seated in the restaurant.)

Hotel Employee: Here you are! (proceeds to bring out one huge plate after another of delicious food)
Me (to my fiancé): Wow! I just thought we’d have a small taste of everything – there’s tons here!
Him: I know! We’re not going to need dinner after this.
Hotel Employee: How is everything?
Us: Fabulous!
Hotel Employee: I’m so glad! And will your matron of honour and best man be arriving soon?
Me: Um … no. I’m sorry – I didn’t realize that you expected them as well.
Hotel Employee: Oh! Well – most couples bring their entire wedding party with them for food tasting.
Me: They do? (Thinking “Why? We’re paying for it, not them.”)
Hotel Employee: Not to worry. Guess you get to eat their share, too!
Us: That won’t be a problem!

(Put it down to ignorance, and not because we were trying to score a free dinner. That hotel got our business, partly because of the quality of the food, and partly because the employee was so nice. Our reception was amazing.)

*I was working a PM Shift, and I wasn’t even an hour into the shift*

Me: Guest services, this is (my name). How may I assist you Mr. (guest’s last name)?
Guest: When I walked to my room I noticed the door was open. Why was that?
Me: Hmm, I am not sure sir. That sounds unusual. Was your door wide open or cracked?
Guest: It was cracked. I’m assuming my door was left cracked when housekeeping came to clean. And now I am not sure if any of my items are missing.
Me: Ok, I do apologize about your door being left open. Most likely it was a mistake by housekeeping because we do not allow anyone access to any guest rooms without going thru proper security measures/permissions first. I will definitely relay this issue to my manager.
Guest: Okay, thank you. Please make sure you close my door next time. Ok?
Me: *DF* Okay sir, bye bye. *Hangs up phone*

This was hilarious… he told ME to make sure *I* close his door? Lol. I don’t step foot near any of the guest rooms. And I literally just got to work, so there is no way I can know his door was left cracked. When guests complain about their room conditions or any issues concerning the room, all I can do is apologize and try to make it better because those issues are from a whole other department. I do not have complete control over what happens on guest floors. I wish we were allowed to double check rooms and scan the hallways before check-in with the Housekeeping Supervisor, but there is never any way of making sure what is done on every floor is 100% accurate. I thought this was hilarious. Yeah ok, I’ll definitely come in to work super early just to make sure YOUR room door is closed after being cleaned. Boy bye LOL.

(My boyfriend and I have just checked into a hotel, and we get into our room. It’s about 1pm, and we hear a cart stop just in front of our door.)

Me, to the boyfriend: How funny would it be if that was room service?

(Right on cue…)

Woman: *Knock knock* “Room service!”

(I answer the door.)

Woman: *glancing around* Oh! Wrong room. You must have just checked in – sorry! Have a great night!

Me: That’s all right, no worries, you too!

(Boyfriend and I shrug and laugh it off, and we begin to unpack for the week.)

(Not five minutes later…)

Different woman: *knock knock* Room service!

Me: *opening door* Uh, yeah, hi, another person went by – we JUST checked in and…

Different woman: Oh! My apologies! Wrong room!

Me: No worries…

(Again we both shrug it off…but then half an hour later!)

Totally different woman: *knock knock* Room service!

Me: *opening door* Aha, okay, seriously, guys, this is the third time…

Totally different woman: *glancing around, then glancing at the clipboard in her hand* Third time? Really? Okay, I am so sorry to bother you, I’ll see it’s fixed. You both have a great night!

Me: Right, you too…

(Luckily the last woman must have fixed it, because we were not bothered the rest of the day!)

When I was six, we were in the middle of moving. I got sick during the journey. The hotel had a free breakfast, but I didn’t want to go down. My parents went without me. We had bread, some snacks, and a microwave in the room.

I knew toast would make me feel better but couldn’t find a toaster. I decided to make it in the microwave. Since the toaster took ten minutes, the microwave would, too, right? I started it and went to watch TV.

You can guess what happened next; the room started filling with smoke and hotel employees came really quickly. I knew to leave the room but didn’t realize that I’d started this. For the record, the room never caught on fire; there was just a lot of smoke.

My parents came back from breakfast to find out that we’d been banned. I wasn’t allowed to use a microwave for years.