Spoke German Initially

, , , , | Working | December 5, 2017

(I am checking in a group of European guests at my hotel. They all primarily speak French, but one of them speaks a little English as well, so he does his best to interpret between me and the other two. Everything goes fine until…)

Me: “And initial here please.”

Customer: “I’m sorry?”

Me: “Just put your initials on this line here.”

Customer: *blank look* “I… what do you mean?”

(I realize that he does not know the word “initials,” at least not in the context I am using it. I try another way.)

Me: “You just want to write the first letter of your first and last name here.” *I try to illustrate by pointing at the letters of his name on the registration card.*

Customer: *still confused* “I am sorry… I do not understand.”

(I don’t want to embarrass the man, but I do have to have the form filled out properly. Suddenly, I get an idea! Many Europeans speak several languages. I think back to the German class I took in high school…)

Me: “Sprechen sie Deutsch?” [Do you speak German?]

Customer: *immediately brightens* “Ja! Ich spreche Deutsch.” [Yes! I speak German.]

(I suddenly realize that I don’t know how to ask for his initials in German, either! My eyes get big and I put my hand to my head.)

Me: “…Ich spreche nicht gut Deutch.” [I don’t speak German very well.] “So sorry!”

Customer: *laughs* “Okay.”

Me: *laughs* “Just sign here, please. Thank you!”

(I wish I had thought of that earlier, but thanks goodness they were so understanding! They turned out to be very pleasant guests!)

They’ve Been Lobby-tomized

, , , | Right | December 4, 2017

(I work in a hotel.)

Customer: *takes sip of coffee from pot in lobby, sneers* “Coffee’s cold!”

Me: “I’m sorry, but there will be another pot made soon.”

Customer: “You should always have coffee. Always!

Me: “We are not a coffee shop; we are a hotel, with all due respect, sir.”

Customer:Always have coffee, hot and ready. Always. You have it listed on your website!”

Me: *snaps* “Sir, let me go now to our website and print out the list of our amenities.” *prints* “As you can see, there is no free coffee in the lobby 24/7. We put some out, out of kindness to you. It’s not required, and you are not paying for it.”

Customer: *sputtering, looking at paper* “I’ll be reporting your rudeness to your manager! Bunch of crooks!” *storms off*

Me: “My rudeness or my correctness?”

(He did report me to my manager, calling me rude and a smarta**. Good thing I warned my manager about it beforehand.)

Runner Needs To Stop Running And Think

, , , , | Working | December 1, 2017

(I work at a family resort on the weekends as front desk lead. This happens to me starting at around 8:00 pm.)

Me: “Hello, we need a pack-and-play for room 547.”

Runner: “Okay, okay, one second.” *waits five seconds* “What did they want?”

Me: “A pack-and-play.”

Runner: “What’s that? Oh, a crib. Okay, and what room number?”

Me: “547.”

Runner: “All right, a crib to 457.”

Me: “No, it’s 547.”

Runner: “457?”

Me: “FIVE, FOUR, SEVEN.”

Runner: “Okay. I got it now.”

Me: “Thank you.”

(One hour later:)

Room 457: “Hello. Someone delivered this crib and we don’t need it.”

Coworker: “Oh, I’m sorry! I’ll let our runner know.” *calls runner* “Hello, 457 called and said they were delivered a rollaway and never ordered one.”

(I’m walking by as this happens, and I’m completely dumbstruck that he STILL delivered the item to 457.)

Runner: “Oh? They don’t want it anymore?”

Me: “He was supposed to deliver it to 547.”

Coworker: “It needs to go to 547. Okay, bye.”

(By this time, 547 has called to complain that their baby wants to sleep and their pack-and-play did not show up. A half hour later, they call back and we call the runner again.)

Runner: *calling from room 557* “Say, what room was that pack-and-thingy supposed to go to?”

Me: *dying inside* “FIVE… FOUR… SEVEN.”

Runner: “Okay.”

(I didn’t receive any more calls after that, so I assume they got it that time.)

Leave Your Trash (TV) On Our Desk

, , , , , | Right | November 30, 2017

(I am down in the laundry room getting towels when a guest is getting checked in, so I have no interaction with him. When I get back, I notice he has left his payment card at the desk, so I walk around to the back to give it back to him.)

Me: “Are you [Guest]?”

Guest: “Uh… Yes?”

Me: *hands him his card*

Guest: “OH! Oh, thank God! THANK GOD! HAHAHA!”

Me: “Haha, yeah, bad thing to leave behind.”

Guest: “HA! Oh, man! Thank God! I thought you were with Cheaters! Oh, thank God! “

Me: “…”

Double The Room For Error

, , , , | Right | November 28, 2017

(I have just checked in a guest who was very unhappy with her room, so I switched her to another right across the hallway.)

Another Guest: “There are some people running back and forth between [Room #1] and [Room #2]. Their noise is waking me up.”

(I realize it’s the guest that I switched earlier, so I send a security guard to check it out. He reports that the guest’s kids are staying in the new room and she and her husband are sleeping in the old one. I call the guest.)

Me: “Ma’am, you can only have one room. If you want the second, you have to pay for it.”

Guest: *arguing* “Can’t we just keep it like this?”

(She argued and then finally agreed to move to her new room. Basically, she was trying to get two rooms for the price of one! Some people…)

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