Doesn’t Know What You(tah) Are Talking About

| MD, USA | Working | September 21, 2016

(I am moving cross country by myself with all of my belongings in a little pickup truck. Note that I’m female, in my early 20s, and look like I’m 14. After a long day of driving, I pull into the first hotel I see that looks like it is in my budget.)

Me: “Hi, I’d like a room for tonight?”

Worker: “Okay, I need your ID and a credit card to put you in the system.”

Me: “Sounds good.”

(I handed over my driver license and credit card. The worker stares at my ID for a moment and says:)

Worker: “Utah? Where is Utah?”

Me: “It’s a state? Further west of here?”

Worker: “I’ve never heard of Utah before.”

Me: “I promise you, it’s a state in the USA and that’s a real driver license.”

(He takes my ID and credit card to a back room where I see him talk frantically to another employee for about five minutes. I am exhausted, so I lean against the counter and wait.)

Worker: “I’m sorry; your credit card is no good. The charge won’t go through.”

Me: “What? Are you sure? Can you try running it again? I know there is more than enough money left on it for a room tonight.”

(He took my card and went back to that room for a moment.)

Worker: “I’m sorry; your card isn’t any good. You can’t stay here tonight.”

(I left the hotel and went to another place down the road. The worker at that desk knew where Utah was, saw how tired I was, heard my story, and reserved me a room. He then told me that he wouldn’t let me check in until I took a coupon from their lobby, got myself a hot meal (using the coupon), and gave me a killer discount! A few days later, after settling into my new home, I checked my bank account. The first hotel had charged me as a no call, no show and their corporate office refused to believe that I had shown up and been turned away. It took a lot of arguing to get them to refund me the money for that night.)

Let That Lesson (Baby)Sit With You

| NY, USA | Related | September 13, 2016

(I am a 16-year-old girl at the time, but am always told that I look like I’m 20. I’m babysitting for a family friend who has three children, ages five, three, and one year. I’m taking them to the pool of a hotel where I’m watching them, and I wrangle them all into the elevator, where a woman and her teenage daughter are already standing.)

Woman: *very clearly staring, whispers to her daughter about me*

Me: “Oh, this? I’m babysitting. But even if I wasn’t, my life choices are none of your business, and it’s not polite to stare! Tell that to your daughter.”

(The woman turned bright red and hurried her daughter out of the elevator!)

You Have It All In Español

| USA | Working | September 7, 2016

(I used to work as a front desk clerk in a hotel before switching to housekeeping. My coworkers hate their jobs, but I prefer it rather than dealing with crazy, demanding customers. I’m also bilingual, and this conversation is in Spanish.)

Coworker: “Why would you want to work as a housekeeper? You know English very well! This country discriminates against us Spanish speakers. If you don’t know English here, you can forget about getting a good job.”

Me: “Because I like this job.”

Coworker: “But why? If I knew English well, I’d be out of here so fast…”

Me: “Doing what?”

Coworker: “Huh?”

Me: “What kind of job would you do once you know English?”

Coworker: “I don’t know… A bank teller, I guess…”

(I tried to tell her how crazy the customers are, but she ignored me and demanded I teach her English! If she only knew…the grass as always greener on the other side, I suppose.)

The Gift-Shop That Keeps On Giving

| FL, USA | Right | September 6, 2016

Me: “Good morning! How can I help you?”

Guest: “Yes, I need to buy a shot glass.”

Me: “All right, we have a gift shop to your right that has many varieties.”

Guest: “Where is it?”

Me: “Right around the corner.” *I motion in the direction*

(Five minutes later, the guest comes right to the front of the line, distraught.)

Guest: “Can you help me? I still cannot find the gift shop!”

(I walk around my desk and point directly at the gift shop which is rather large. A few moments later the guest brings a shot glass and a shirt to my desk.)

Guest: “I’d like to buy this.”

Me: “Sir, the checkout is within the gift shop.”

Guest: “Oh, where’s the gift shop?”

Wake Me Up Before You Go Go

| Manchester, CT, USA | Friendly | September 2, 2016

(A couple friends of mine and I are staying in a hotel overnight celebrating one of their birthdays and one of them starts to worry about what would be done to him if he were the first to fall asleep.)

Friend: “Don’t worry about that. I’ll be honest; I would wake you up in a terrible way, but I will NOT mess with a man while he’s asleep.”

Me: “Wait, in order to wake him up in a terrible way, you technically have to start by messing with him while he’s asleep.”

Friend: *wide eyed* “I never thought of that…”

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