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Suffers From Bad Timing

| Pittsburgh, PA, USA | Hotels & Lodging, Time, Transportation

(I work in a hotel that offers a complimentary shuttle to the local area from 7 am to 10 pm. At 6:30 in the evening a guest comes down to inquire about our service.)

Me: “Hi! How can I help you?”

Guest: “What time does the seven o’clock shuttle leave?”

(After a brief moment of silence.)

Me: “The seven o’clock shuttle normally leaves at seven o’clock.”

Guest: “Okay, so that’s seven pm right?”

Me: “Yes. The seven o’clock shuttle leaves twice a day. One at seven am and the other at seven pm.”

Guest: “I thought your shuttle runs more than that.”

Me: “It does, but it would no longer be the seven o’clock shuttle. Instead it would be the eight or nine o’clock one depending on when it was leaving.”

Guest: “Oh, I see. I didn’t realize you had more than one shuttle.”

(I remained silent as the guest walked away.)

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Wireless, Clueless, Hopeless, Part 25

| OR, USA | Bizarre, Hotels & Lodging, Popular, Technology

(I work front desk at a hotel.)

Me: “Front desk. This is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Guest: “Yes, I was just wondering if you could maybe turn down the wifi?”

Me: “I’m sorry… Could you repeat your question?”

Guest: “Yeah, could you please turn the wifi down?”

Me: “I’m sorry; you want me to turn the wifi down? Are you having trouble connecting to the Internet?”

Guest: “No, I want it off!”

Me: “Well, I can’t turn it off; otherwise the other guests won’t have any Internet either.”

Guest: “Well, could you at least turn it down a bit, then?”

Me: “If you don’t want any Internet you can simply disconnect any devices you have from the wifi, but I can’t turn it down.”

Guest: *grunts and gives a deep sigh* “Okay, obviously you have no idea what wifi is.”

(The guest hangs up and a few hours later he comes up to the front desk and wants to check out a day early.)

Me: “Was there something wrong with the room that I could help you with?”

Guest: “Yeah, I want to get out of here because your d*** wifi is so strong! Maybe you should turn it down a bit so people can get some rest!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir; I really don’t understand what you mean.”

Guest: “I’m leaving because I have a headache! If you had just turned down the f***ing wifi like I asked my head wouldn’t hurt so much!”

Me: “I’m… sorry?”

(The guest left in a rage and when I told my manager what had happened he laughed and agreed that he had no idea what was wrong with that guy.)

Related:
Wireless, Clueless, And Hopeless, Part 24
Wireless, Clueless, And Hopeless, Part 23
Wireless, Clueless, And Hopeless, Part 22

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Probably Not Adhering To The Lobby Dress-Code

| Minneapolis, MN, USA | Family & Kids, Hotels & Lodging, Love/Romance, Popular

(I check in a young, very attractive couple on a Friday evening.)

Me: “That’s it; you’re all set. Enjoy your stay!”

Girl: “Oh, we will. I’m touring my boyfriend’s college and he decided to make it a romantic night instead of staying in his dorm!”

(Come Sunday I’m working the desk when I see the young man running through the lobby, completely naked. Hot on his heels is an older man, and following him is the girl also very naked.)

Girl: *yelling* “Dad, stop!”

(Security managed to stop the dad, but the boyfriend was out the door and down the street before they could stop him. The police brought him back a few hours later, laughing their asses off. Apparently Dad had gotten a fraud alert when his daughter used her card out of state and had noticed some interesting purchases. Mom came in a few days later and made Dad apologize.)