A Bad Case Of The Churls

, , , | Related | August 10, 2017

(My mom is admitted to the hospital for what turns out to be pneumonia with two collapsed lungs, among other complications. She’s required to wear an oxygen mask, but because she’s delirious, she keeps trying to take it off. Meanwhile, I’m constantly forcing her to keep it on. She’s quite irritable, and I’m very tired from babysitting her. One of our interactions went something like this:)

Mom: “Where are my clothes?”

Me: “You’re in the hospital, Mom. You don’t need your clothes.”

Mom: “Don’t you have any sense of decency?!”

Me: “None of the patients have decency in the hospital. Everyone wears gowns.”

Mom: *removing her mask* “I’m pissed off at you right now.”

Me: *snatching it back up and holding it to her face* “You have to keep that on.”

Mom: “[My Name], if you say that one more time…”

Me: “I have to; you keep taking it off!”

Mom: *glaring at me hard* “You’re churlish!”

(I’m very amused by her “churlish” comment and relay it to my family later. Afterwards, my mom is sedated for a few weeks, and my family takes shifts at the hospital to watch her. When she regains consciousness, she says she loves me; it’s a very touching moment. I return home and tell my family how she’s doing.)

Me: “And she said she loves me.”

Brother: “No, she doesn’t, you churl.”

(When my mom’s better, we tell her about the “churlish” comment as well.)

Mom: “I don’t even know what that word means!”

A Slight Dislocation Of Professionalism

| UK|UK | Working | July 27, 2017

(I’ve dislocated my finger sideways and gone to hospital. The second the doctor sees my hand, he does this…)

Doctor: “OH, MY GOSH! LOOK AT THAT!” *hurries over to the door* “HEY, JOHN, COME IN HERE! YOU’VE GOT TO SEE THIS!”

I Find Your Lack Of Professional Attire… Disturbing

| Sacramento, CA, USA | Working | July 26, 2017

(My two immediate managers (one male and one female) call me into the office to “talk” to me about something.)

Me: “So, what did I do this time?”

Female: “Why do you assume you are in trouble [My Name]?”

Me: “Whenever I get called into this office by you, it’s something wrong I did. So, what happened now?”

Male: “Well, [My Name], we received a few complaints about your attire.”

(I am wearing a classic Star Wars tee, black with the original Return of the Jedi poster design on it.)

Me: “It’s Star Wars; the patients love it and it makes them smile. What’s wrong with that?”

Female: “Well, some employees have complained that it offends them.”

(I couldn’t help but stare at her.)

Me:Star Wars is offensive? Okay then, I won’t wear this shirt anymore.”

(They let me leave the office. The next day I showed up with my Star Wars Clone Troopers Scrub top, and walked by both managers who didn’t say a word. The following week I wore the same shirt again and was told nothing… Hypocritical much?)

Lost And Found Knows No Bounds

| USA | Right | July 17, 2017

(An older lady walks into the ER waiting room, where I am sitting at the front desk.)

Lady: “I have a strange request for you, young lady. I hope you can help me.”

Me: *thinking I’ve heard strange* “Oh, I’m sure it’s not that bad, ma’am. How can I help you?”

Lady: “Well, see, I was here the other day and I left a pair of earrings here by accident.”

Me: “Oh, that’s no trouble!”

(I pick up the phone to call Security since we hand such items to our Lost and Found.)

Lady: *continuing* “Yes, they’re a small black pair of magnetic earrings. I left them on my wheelchair. ”

Me: *pauses, puts down the phone* “I’m sorry?”

Lady: “I put them on my wheelchair. See, I wasn’t feeling very well, I have vertigo, and I took them off and put them on the nearest metal item! My daughter remembered that, too.”

(At this point I’m thinking it’ll be a little harder to check, since we have about 100 or so wheelchairs on the hospital property and with patients currently using them, but I figure it’s only been a few days.)

Me: “Okay, and when was your visit, ma’am? You said a few days ago?”

Lady: “Well… actually it was a while ago. On [date three months earlier].”

Me: “Okay, ma’am, I will do my best but I have to warn you, the likelihood we’ll find them is slim after that long. But I’ll try.”

Lady: “Please do.”

(I call Security, who first asks me to repeat what I just asked for, then where the earrings might have been found, all while this lady keeps interrupting me and “helping” when I’m listening to their answers. After a few minutes they come up empty.)

Me: “Okay, ma’am, we don’t have them in our Lost and Found. We can check the wheelchairs we have out here, but unfortunately I can’t go through every—”

Lady: *indignant* “Why can’t we check all the wheelchairs?”

Me: “Ma’am, we have over 100 wheelchairs! And by now the one you were in could be on the other side of the campus, or up on a floor. Some of them have patients in them. I’m sorry but this is the best I can do. Let me help you—”

(She storms over to the wheelchairs muttering under her breath, and I follow, dutifully checking all the metal for earrings. After I have finished under her supervision, she still checks them herself and — surprise — comes up empty.)

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, did you check your purse when you got home in case—”

Lady: “My daughter and I checked! And she distinctly remembers me leaving them here!” *she goes into a rant about how we aren’t being helpful at all*

(I am about to ask for her name and phone number so we can call in case we find them, but that is the last proverbial straw.)

Me: “Well, all I can say is, I’m sorry, ma’am. I hope you have a nice—”

Lady: *walks away, ignoring me*

Nurse: *pops her head around the corner* “Did that really just happen?”

Calling Out The Manager For Calling Out

| Ellwood City, PA, USA | Working | July 14, 2017

(My father has a rather bad attack of diverticulitis (intestinal problems) and has to go to the hospital. I am worried and make the hour drive to my hometown after work to see him. Since I have the next day off, I stay there, and I make the following phone call more than 24 hours in advance of when I am supposed to work again. I am not in the habit of calling off for frivolous things.)

Me: “Hi, [Manager], it’s [My Name]. My dad had to go to the hospital last night. He’s still there and going to be for a couple of days and since my mom is out of town and I’m an only child, I need to call off for tomorrow so I can stay with my dad and take care of their dog.”

Manager: *pause, then, clearly annoyed* “Well, isn’t there anyone else who can handle it?”

Me: “Well… no. Again, I’m an only child and my mother is out of town.”

Manager: *again, obviously annoyed* “Well, I GUESS if you have to.”

Me: *fuming*

(The kicker? This was the same manager who FREQUENTLY called off or went home for migraines. I understand that migraines can be debilitating, but you’d think a person like that would have some sympathy. Guess not.)

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