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One Mother To Rule Them All

| Related | December 27, 2011

(We are sitting around the dinner table eating as a family.)

Dad: *clearly thinking something* “I like… I like movies.”

Brother: “Okay?”

Dad: “I like movies… like Lord of the Rings.”

Mom: “Jim… no you don’t.”

Dad: *shrugging* “I know.”

Might Be On A Bit Too Much Moonshine

| Related | December 26, 2011

(My mother is asking me about a time when I went back-packing through Australia for a year.)

Mom: “Does Australia get the moon down there?”

Running Over Jokes Are Running Dry

, , | Romantic | December 26, 2011

(My Dad is telling me a joke.)

Dad: “Did you hear that a woman gets run over every 15 minutes?”

Me: “Really?”

Dad: “Yeah, she’s starting to get cheesed off.”

(I laugh. My mum enters the room, so my Dad tries his joke on her.)

Dad: “Hey, have you heard that a woman gets run over every 15 minutes?”

Mum: “She should get out of the bleeding road then!”

Nailing The Right Gift

| Romantic | December 25, 2011

(It’s Christmas morning, and my boyfriend and I are exchanging gifts. We’ve been together for over 4 years at this point.)

Him: “Wait, there’s one more for you.”

Me: “Okay…”

(He reaches behind his back and gets down on a knee. I start tearing up.)

Him: “Here you go, a gift certificate for a mani/pedi. You deserve it!”

(A few years later and we’re still together…and I have excellent nails!)

Someone’s Mind Is Obviously Made Up

| Related | December 23, 2011

(I don’t normally wear makeup. My mom is trying to convince me that I would look nice with a bit of makeup.)

Mom: “You should get some makeup.”

(I stick my tongue out.)

Mom: “That’s lovely.”

Me: “Makeup won’t fix that.”

(My sister walks into the conversation.)

Sister: “Makeup won’t fix what?”

(I stick my tongue out again.)

Sister: “What? Your face?”