Right Working Romantic Related Learning Friendly Healthy Legal Inspirational Unfiltered

Hair-Raising A Baby

| Related | January 5, 2012

(My husband, baby, and I are getting ready for an 80’s party at our neighbor’s house. My mom has just stopped by unexpectedly.)

Mom: “As I was hanging up the phone, I heard you say ‘Ah, my mom’s coming!’ Why?”

Me: “No reason.”

Mom: “Wait, why are you dressed like that? Is the baby wearing hairspray?! Let me take a picture of you guys! You look hilarious!”

Me: “Okay, sure.”

Mom: *to the baby* “Look buddy, I have evidence now. I can probably make a strong case to take custody of you based on this picture alone.”

1 Thumbs

Hard To Digest Facts

| Related | January 5, 2012

(My boyfriend is staying over for dinner. Later in the evening, he has to go to the bathroom. He is taking a while.)

Mom: *whispering to me* “Is he okay in there?”

Me: “I’m sure he’s fine.”

Mom: “What’s he doing in there?”

Me: *uncomfortable and confused* “Mom, he’s probably taking a number two.”

Mom: “Why is he doing that?”

(At this point, I have no idea what her problem is. I can’t find a way to answer this politely.)

Me: “Because, he has a functional digestive system?”

Mom: *angry and embarrassed* “Stop talking to me like that! Don’t be smart!”

(I share this conversation with my boyfriend after he is done with his business. He is now scared to take a number two in the same house as my mother.)

1 Thumbs

Dating Sheldon Cooper, Part 3

, , , | Romantic | January 5, 2012

(I roll over and hug my partner.)

Me: “I love you, babe.”

Partner: *completely asleep, smiling* “Mmhmm. The equivalence of two point five and a half hamburgers!”

(I laugh hysterically while trying not to wake him up.)

This story is part of the Nerds In Love roundup!

Read the next Nerds In Love roundup story!

Read the Nerds In Love roundup!

1 Thumbs

Needs More Than Just A New Color

| Romantic | January 5, 2012

(I’ve just come home from getting my hair done at the hairdressers.)

Him: *eyeballing my suspiciously* “You look different.”

Me: “Mmm-hmm?”

(I wait for him to mention the new hair colour.)

Him: “Yeah. You look…beautiful?”

1 Thumbs

An Extra Birth Is Worth The Mirth

| Related | January 4, 2012

(I am 13 months younger than my older sister and was, suffice it to say, unplanned.)

Me: “I would never want to have kids so close together. Two years at least, I think.”

Dad: “Well, what can I say. You were kind of an accident.”

Mom: “Honey, don’t tell her that! She’ll think we didn’t want her!”

Dad: “Okay, dear.” *looks at me* “You weren’t an accident.”

Mom: “Thank you!”

Dad: “You were more of an ‘Oh, crap!’”

Mom: “Honey!”

(At this point I am laughing too hard to even protest.)

1 Thumbs