That Benefit Went Straight Down The Faucet

| Rio Rancho, NM, USA | At The Checkout, Criminal & Illegal, Money

(I work at a home improvement store. A customer has picked out a faucet.)

Me: “Great! We have that exact one in stock. While I set up this order, I will have someone go get it from the warehouse for you!”

Customer: “That’s perfect! What do I owe?”

Me: “$103.00. That can be cash, check, or card.”

Customer: *hands me a card*

Me: “Uhm. This is a EBT card.”

Customer: “Yeah, I know.”

Me: “Uhm, food stamps only work on food and necessities. Did you mean to give me a credit or debit?”

Customer: “No, just charge the card I gave you.”

Me: “Uhm, ma’am, I cannot do that. This is a state issued EBT card. It’s not meant to be used for household fixtures, just food and some basic supplies. My computer won’t even accept it if I did enter the information.”

Customer: “I want it charged to that card! That is why I gave you that card!”

Me: “I understand that; however, that is not how these cards work.”

Customer: “Well, why not?”

Me: “Because the state issues them for families who cannot afford food, water, formula, or other needs. But it has to be for a need that is basic to supporting life, not things like faucets or even clothes.”

Customer: “But I NEED a new faucet.”

Me: “Well, if you are renting, the owner of the property should be the own who replaces it. If you own your residence, I can ring this up with cash, check, or a bank issued card.”

Customer: “Just swipe the card I gave you!”

Me: “This is a state issued food stamp card. I cannot.”

Customer: “This is discrimination because you think I am poor!”

Me: “Ma’am, I do not judge based on how much money a customer happens to have. However, I can refuse forms of payment that either do not work, will not work, or are illegal to attempt to use.”

Customer: “Illegal? Now you don’t think I am American!”

Me: “What? I said forms of payment that are illegal to use.”

Customer: “You are calling me an illegal!”

Me: “Ma’am, I cannot help you. Nor can I sell you this with the payment you offered me. You can either give me a legal, bank issued form of payment or not buy from this store.”

Customer: “How dare you!” *flounces out*

A Heavy Dose Of Misogyny Or Laziness?

| MI, USA | Bad Behavior

(I work as a loader/lot attendant at a popular hardware store. People tend to give me a hard time of it since I’m female. At this point, I’ve just been called to a register by a coworker. They are with a female customer.)

Coworker: “Hey, this customer needs help getting the insulation blower out of her truck.”

Customer: “You mean she’s gonna do this?”

Me: “Yep, I’ve got it. Come on.”

(We go outside and I begin to get all the parts out of her rather tall truck. I’m starting to wonder why she’s not even helping at all, as the customer usually helps me unload. But she stands there glaring at me like I’m a disease. Finally, I come to the heaviest part.)

Me: “Hey, would you mind grabbing the other side of this and helping me lower it onto the cart?”

Customer: *huffs angrily and glares* “I did not want to have to be doing this!”

Me: “I’m sorry…?”

(She lifts it off anyways with my help, but then, suddenly lets go once it’s off the truck. The machine drops and smashes down into my knee, bruising it badly. It’s not on the cart the whole way and the cart is rolling away as I struggle to lift it on the rest of the way.)

Me: “Could you please at least hold the cart still for me?”

(She then gave me one last glare, brushed off her jacket, turned around, got into her truck, and drove off.)

Taking Good Account Of The Plumbing

| Barrhaven, ON, Canada | Bizarre, Home Improvement

(I am working in the plumbing department of a big home improvement store. A customer comes to me on a busy weekend afternoon and asks about how to replace a toilet. I go through the steps. As I do so, he regularly interrupts to challenge what I’m saying.)

Me: “You have to set the toilet down straight to ensure a good seal. Hold it by the sides here and stand like this.”

Customer: “No, that’s not right.”

Me: “Yes, it is, because if you set it down on an angle the wax seal is squished and can’t bounce back.”

Customer: “Hmm.”

(And so on. This goes on for some time until finally he challenges what I say and instead of explaining, I ask how he plans on doing this.)

Customer: “Oh, I’m not doing anything. I’m an accountant; I don’t know anything about plumbing. I’m having someone else do it but I want to be able to challenge them and look like I know what I’m talking about.”

This Transaction Went Straight Down The Toilet

| CA, USA | Bad Behavior, Theme Of The Month

(A customer came into our store with a toilet that he had installed himself, and he wanted to return it. This toilet had been used and was disgusting. He had no receipt, and we couldn’t find the purchase on any of his credit cards.)

Customer: “I want you to return this NOW!”

Manager: “Sir, we can’t return a high price item without a receipt or the card used.”

Customer: “If you don’t return this one, I’m just going to take one off of the shelf!”

Manager: “I wouldn’t do that if I were you.”

(The customer proceeded to pick up the filthy toilet and throw it. It broke, and our associates ended up having to clean it up.)

Coming In For War Paint

| Bethesda, MD, USA | Crazy Requests, Home Improvement

(I’m a manager at a popular home supply store in the paint supplies department. I’m filling orders for paint, because the work is getting so backed up, when a clearly angry customer approaches the desk. One of the employees talks to the lady for a while before she starts screaming for a manager. The employee points in my direction and waves at me to come over. I drop what I’m doing and walk over.)

Customer: “HELLOOOOOO!”

Me: “Hello there! How can I help you?”

(She lifts a nearly empty can and slams it on the counter.)

Customer: “You dip-s***s sold me the wrong color! My living room is RUINED!”

Me: “Ma’am, I understand you are frustrated, but please refrain from using coarse language. What color were you trying to get?”

Customer: “A DIFFERENT ONE! YOU gave me a MUCH darker color than what’s on this swatch!”

Me: “Here, let me see what you have.”

(The customer hands me a paint swatch with a honey-color circled in marker. I look at the paint and it matches exactly.)

Me: “Is this the color that’s on your walls now?”

Customer: “YES! How many times do I have to say it?! It’s hideous and YOUR fault!”

Me: “By chance, did you try a sample of the paint first? To see what it looked like with the normal lighting in your room? The samples are quite inexpensive and allow you to try out a few different colors to make sure you like something before—”

Customer: “WHY would I spend money on a SAMPLE?! SAMPLES are FREE!”

Me: *glazing over* “This is paint we’re talking about. We give you enough to cover a small area. It’s not like the sample has noth—”

Customer: “You need to fix this mess you made NOW!! You ruined my living room! Now you’re going to fix it!”

Me: “We are not responsible for you not liking the paint you picked out. I CAN mix up some samples for you to take ho—”

Customer: “And YOU need to come to my house to paint my living room!”

Me: “That’s not going to happen.”

Customer: “And you’re going to do it for free to make up for the distress you’ve caused.”

Me: “That is DEFINITELY not going to happen.”

Customer: “And you’re going to refund me the price of the paint!”

Me: “That is also not happening.”

Customer: “AND I want a gift certificate to show me how sorry you are for the headache you’ve caused!”

Me: “In that case, that will definitely never happen.”

Customer: “Then give me my next room’s worth of paint for free!”

Me: “Absolutely not.”

Customer: *shrugs* “Oh well, it was worth a try.”

(She then turned around and left without her empty paint cans.)

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