Unfiltered Story #91957

, , | Unfiltered | August 26, 2017

I work in the lumber department of a big box home improvement store, and there is one other lumber associate at the time helping other customers. A lady that looks in her 60s comes and is asking me for items to make shelves. She is really demanding, clueless, cheap, and indecisive and I take her all around the department to explain the difference between using plywood, 2-inch and 1-inch wood, or pre-cut shelves. I am in the 1-inch aisle trying to get her to understand the difference between pine priced per piece and hardwood priced per foot, when a regular customer (a man in his 50s) that has been waiting patiently for a couple minutes cuts in.

Man: “I have a quick question, where is [type of product for which there is two types]?”

Me: “I can answer quickly, but first which type… ”

Woman (rudely to Man): “Excuse, me but he was with me first. You’re really rude for interrupting us before we are done.

Man: “I’m really rude? You’re the one who is rude! I just have a quick question and then he can go back with you since you’ve been hogging him.”

– Both customers look at me basically to see who I side with and I stand speechless for a minute

Woman: “Well where I come from it is rude to cut in on customer until they are done with the salesperson.”

Man (now shouting): Listen lady, you’re the one who is rude, any decent person would let him answer a simple question first and then go back to you”

– At this point they are both standing tall and I swear they are about to come to blows. To cut the tension, I speak up:

Me: (to man) “I was with this this lady first. There is someone on the back saw, he can help you when he is done with his customer or I will help you when I am done with this customer, whoever is done first.

Man: (obviously annoyed with the lady not me): “Fine, whatever” and walks away

Woman: “Thank you. That man was really rude, wouldn’t you agree?”

– It wanted to say that both of them were rude, but I ignored the question and I spend another 10 min with the lady to help her decide and finally get some hardwood laminated plywood and take it to the panel saw to cut. While cutting, I see the man pass by and I politely say I will be with him shortly. Both customers eye each other with evil eyes. The lady repeatedly makes snide remarks about the man to me but intentionally loud enough for the man to hear as he walks away. I finish cutting for the lady and have 1/2 the board left in large scraps left over from cutting out the shelves to size.

Me: “Do you want the left over pieces.”

Lady: “What do you do with scraps if I don’t want them?”

Me: “We usually keep on a cart and offer to customers free if they want them. Since you are paying for the whole piece, we can’t resell them, and if there are leftovers at the end of the day, we throw them away.

Lady: “Ok, you can give them away to anyone… except that rude man.”

The lady takes her cart and walks away but the register is in sight of the saw. The man comes to the saw with some OSB (cheaper than plywood than the lady got) and has apparently answered his own question from earlier.

Man: “Man that b**** was crazy. Anyway, I need this cut to [about the same size as the scraps from the lady]. Actually, what are those scraps, can I have them?

Me (not knowing how to say this tactfully and at the same time not laugh): “Um, actually they are from that lady and normally we give the scraps away, but, umm… she specifically said not to give them to you. However, I’ll wait until she leaves the store and then I will give them to you.”

Man: “That’s Ok, I wouldn’t even want anything from that crazy b*** anyway. Just cut it out of the boards I grabbed”

I cut for him and he leaves his scraps and now I have a whole board worth of scraps that I end up throwing out at the end of the day (it’s actually sad how much stuff we end up throwing away each day)

You’ve Met Your Match

, , , | Right | August 25, 2017

(One afternoon near the paint department, a nice, neat, fashionable couple in their thirties approach me.)

Woman: “We’re looking for felt pads.”

Me: “Yes, here they are. You have a variety of shapes. These are cut in circles, and rectangles. This one is a big sheet you can cut to match what you need.”

(I point to the various packages on an end cap.)

Man: “Do you have any other colours?”

Me: “No. They only come in this colour.”

Woman: “You see, we were looking for something darker, to match our furniture.”

Man: “Yes, our furniture is a darker oak, and we wanted the pads to match. Do you have any others?”

Me: “I’m afraid not. Mind you, they are under the furniture and totally out of sight.”

Woman: “We really want it to match.”

Me: “You could colour them if you wanted.”

Man: “No, that wouldn’t be the same. Are you sure you don’t have any darker ones?”

Woman: “We really want them to match the furniture.”

(And so on. After several minutes, I left them to discuss it among themselves.)

They Finally Nailed It

, , , | Right | August 17, 2017

(I work in the hardware department. This means mostly screws, nuts, and bolts. An older woman come in.)

Customer: “I need a screw that I can bend to hang up a line from.”

Me: “What is the line for?”

Customer: “I want to hang a line to dry some clothes.”

Me: “In that case I can suggest a screw hook.” *I show it to her*

Customer: “No. That’s not what I want.”

(After showing her as many possible screws as I can think of, she gets quite mad.)

Customer: ” NO, I want a screw that you hammer in!”


Me: “Do you want a nail?”

Customer: *looks me up and down and then says with disgust* “Well, if that’s what you call it!”

The Internet Of Dumb Things

, , , , , | Right | August 15, 2017

(A coworker and I are working at the customer service desk when a female customer comes up. She tells my coworker she wants to buy an item that she saw online. My coworker gets the item number and processes the sale.)

Customer: *at end of transaction* “I guess I could have just come in here in the first place instead of spending time looking at this online. I spent so much time on the website. I just wanted to pay cash. I was looking for the place to pay cash for it.”

Coworker: “Online?”

Customer: “Yeah. On the website. I couldn’t find where to pay with cash.”

Leaving The Landlord Feeling Exposed

, , , , , | Working | August 14, 2017

(Not long after I move in to a rental I have to change one of the light bulbs in my kid’s room. The light fitting falls out of the ceiling as I touch it, revealing that the wiring’s protective covering is brittle and it exposes bare wires. The real estate contacts the owners who come out with their “electrician” who quietly informs me that he is not an electrician and just a friend. It’s illegal to work on electrical matters unless you are qualified; a lot do to save money but most know what they are doing. Another time I get a small shock from a light switch. The real estate sends their qualified electrician out to repair that. Then another light fitting falls down when I barely touch it to change a light bulb leaving exposed wires. I turn off the power and call the real estate, who promises to call the owners immediately. They call back a little later.)

Real Estate: “We’ve tried contacting the owners but there’s been no answer. They don’t want us using our electrician but considering that this is an emergency situation we are sending one out right now.”

(The electrician arrives not long after, and after seeing how the metal light fitting is hanging from the ceiling.)

Electrician: “Did you pull down on it or what?”

Me: “No, I only just touched the light bulb and the whole thing fell.”

Electrician: “But you took all of the glass light shades off?”

Me: “No, all of the light shades of all the lights in the house were missing when we moved in.”

Electrician: “Okay. I’ll get started, then.”

(He checks that the power is off and climbs his ladder, so I go to do something else. A few moments later I hear him swear.)

Electrician: “Oh, s***!”

(I hear him go out the front door, and the power box open and close, before he comes back in. He then goes to all of the metal light fittings in the house touching them with an electrical tester.)

Electrician: “S***, s***, s***!”

(He enters the kitchen and tests the fitting there.)

Electrician: “F****** h***!”

Me: “Are you okay?”

Electrician: *looks very shaken* “Oh, I’m sorry about that. I’m amazed that no one has died in this place. All of these light fittings are wired up wrong. They have the live wire attached to the fitting instead of the grounding wire. Every fitting in this house is live. I’m replacing all of them.”

(He removes all of the fittings and replaces them with simple cheap single bulb fittings and asks me about throwing out the old ones because they are rusted and pitted. We decide to keep them because it’s rental and they prove they are wired wrong so he puts them into the roof space. About a month later I get a visit from the owners.)

Owner: “Who gave you permission to get an electrician out? I’ve just had a huge bill sent to me. I’m not paying it.”

Me: “I didn’t get the electrician. The real estate did when a light fitting fell from the ceiling and they couldn’t get in contact with you.”

Owner: “Why did they replace five lights, then?”

Me: “They were all wired wrong; the electrician said it’s a wonder that no one was killed in this place because they weren’t put in by an electrician.”

Owner: “All the lights in here were done by an electrician!””

Me: “The same sort of electrician you brought with you last time?”


Me: “We kept them safe, especially for proof that they were wired wrong in the first place.”

Owner: “Oh… we won’t worry about that, then.” *quickly says their goodbyes and leaves*

(The same owner tried making me pay for damaged blinds after the real estate signed off that the blinds were in the same condition as when we moved in. They also weren’t happy that we hadn’t repainted the crappily painted walls that they did themselves, or finish the jobs they had left undone when they lived there.)

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