Otto-Managed That Well

, , , | Right | November 15, 2020

A woman with an extremely aggressive husband comes into the warehouse and picks out a storage ottoman they want.

The storage ottomans are a frustrating item, as the metal mechanisms that allow the lid to be opened and shut make them extremely heavy, needing at least two people to lift it.

The naturally-aggressive douchebag husband flat-out refuses to pay delivery for his ottoman he’s just purchased.

Husband: “We’ll just pick it up.”

Yeah, right, buddy… more like, “We will drive our small car round back and your warehouse staff can do it.”

The husband and wife conclude the sales process in store and the sales associate passes a copy of the paperwork onto me.

I scan it over and make sure they’ve ticked off and signed off on the terms and conditions:

“All clearance sales are final. All clearance sales are ‘as is.’ Warehouse staff and sales staff are not covered under any insurance for loading or unloading customer’s goods. Customers are responsible for the pickup of any items they purchase.”

The customer pulls their car round… and it’s a smallish car, but should be fine.

The husband walks over and I show him where his freshly-bagged ottoman is and hand him a trolley.

Husband: “What’s that for?”

Me: “To load your ottoman, sir.”

Husband: “No, no, no, you’re doing it.”

Me: “There’s two of you, sir; you’ll be fine.”

Husband: “Well, then, I’m cancelling my order and filing a complaint against your company.”

I just sigh. I don’t want to cost this salesperson a sale, but my gut is trying to tell me something.

I quickly go into the office and grab a release form which we use for anyone picking up clearance, but I make a few handwritten notes of my own.

I bring the paperwork back out and show it to the customer.

Me: “Sir, could you fill out your full name and contact details, initial these handwritten comments, and sign this release?”

Husband: “Why?”

Me: “It just says that you’re happy to have me help you load up your ottoman and that if anything happens, you won’t hold us liable.”

Husband: *Smirks* “Wow, you guys sure take things seriously.”

I just smile as he signs the document. I pass it to my offsider, asking him to make a few photocopies for the sales associate, the manager, the area manager, and the general manager.

The wife grabs one end along with her husband and I grab the other end. We all lift it up and begin walking it toward the trunk of the car. The wife seems fine but the husband is struggling. He keeps asking to put it down so he can take a break.

We pick up the ottoman again, and as we are just about to reach the car, the husband lets go of his end, the lounge tips to the right, I lurch forward, and the ottoman smashes into the back of their car, taking out the right tail light.

The wife immediately starts laughing as the husband loses his s***. He is inspecting the damage and is looking at me with wild eyes, wanting me to offer him an admission of guilt.

I calmly stand there as they load up their ottoman and drive away.

The next day, the husband calls the store:

Husband: “I am filing a lawsuit against the company for damages!”

He provides human resources and the head office with excessive estimates. Immediately, I am called into the board room upstairs. There’s the general manager, the manager, an HR representative, and a legal representative who is there for the shareholders.

General Manager: “We’re not risking a lawsuit. We’re going to pay for this guy’s car.”

Without a word, I take out the document the customer signed. I hand it to the HR rep, who hands it to the general manager.

Me: “The customer signed off on a release form after I explained that the company didn’t cover or expect me to load his goods. The customer clearly stated here that if I helped him, he was absolving me of any liability, including vehicle damage.”

The general manager handed the document over to the lawyer, who scanned it. His face changed; he knew they couldn’t do anything.

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When It Comes To Bad Customers She’s The Complete Set

, , , | Right | October 23, 2020

We sell a lot of furniture and other things for your home. We are selling an outdoor furniture set that had a chair missing so it is on sale. A coworker uses the walkie to ask why it is on sale, and after telling her a chair is missing from the set THREE times, I finally go over to help. I have to add that the people who shop at our store leave things all over the place and don’t pick up after themselves. I’m constantly picking up after people, so I do it without thinking about it.

Customer: “Why is this on sale?”

Me: “One of the chairs broke during shipment, so we marked down the set.”

Customer: “Well, it doesn’t say that!”

Me: “I understand, but it does say that it is a three-piece set, and as you can see, there are only two pieces here. I will write on the ticket to avoid further confusion. I’m sorry about that.”

Customer: “Okay, well, it doesn’t say that.”

I don’t know what else to say, so I apologize again. Let me add that this set is sitting on a platform and she took both pieces off and had them flipped over on the ground so she could inspect them. She is acting like she doesn’t want the set and I think the conversation is over. She steps back and seems like she is going to walk away, so I start to put the set back on the platform. 

Customer: “Um… can I not look at that anymore?! Is that not allowed?!”

Me: “I’m sorry, I thought you were finished.”

The platform is an inch off the ground, so moving it back isn’t a huge deal and she can still look at it if I put it back.

Customer: *Sarcastic* “I’m sorry that was such a problem for you!”

Me: “…”

I just walked away. She didn’t buy it.

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Will Not Keep Your Opinions In The Interior

, , , , , | Right | October 19, 2020

I work as an architect and interior designer and have an amazing set of clients, but then there are always the occasional few who make you question your own sanity.

This particular client is my late father’s friend and he loves to keep reminding me of that. He approaches me about renovating his house.

Client: “Can your contractors do it in a minimal budget?”

Me: “I’ll get back to you when I’ve checked how much the requirements will cost. Give me about three days.”

Client: “You don’t understand the urgency! I’ll be taking only the designs from you, and I will hire my own contractor.”

This particular contractor has a big male ego and does not listen to a word I say, since I’m a woman. Unsurprisingly, it does not work out and the client has to come around and ask for my contractor.

Client: “Hey, so how much will your contractor charge to renovate the kitchen?”

Me: “It will cost you around $2300 and maximum $3000.”

Client: “Oh, $2300 works for me.”

Me: “It can go up to $3000, since the requirements are more.”

Client: “Okay, please try to keep it minimum.”

Me: “Sure.”

The work starts, and in the course of time, he comes to me with very high demands and expects the budget to remain well within the initial quote. I somehow manage to hold the budget at $2800 and am glad that it didn’t go above the initial quote.

On sending the invoice, I get a call from him and he is furious. I keep the call on speaker so that my partner can listen to this, as well.

Client: “You told me that it will cost $2300 and now you say $2800! Who the f*** do you think you are, trying to scam me?!”

I am quite alarmed but still manage to talk calmly.

Me: “I would appreciate it if you didn’t take that tone with me. I already told you earlier it could go up to $3000 and it’s come below that. I don’t know how much more I can help you.”

Client: “You have no sense of business and don’t know how to work professionally! You guys are incompetent and I won’t recommend you anywhere. You clearly don’t remember anything. You told me it’ll cost $2600 and maximum $3000 and now you say it’s $2800. How big a fool do you think I am?”

My partner comes over and speaks in a very calm yet stern voice, as I am speechless from the sheer stupidity.

Partner: “A big one. Please understand how basic math works and then call us. If you do not pay us, we will be suing you as we have everything on record with us. You have been extremely rude to [My Name] and she has been patient because you are her father’s friend. If you call her again and take the same tone, I will file a complaint against you for harassment and fraud. Do you understand that?”

Client: “Uh… but… uh… um… bye.”

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These Home Improvement Employees Need Brain Improvement

, , , , | Working | October 6, 2020

I’m walking around a large local home improvement store in search of a spirit level to help me lay some paving slabs. There are several aisles with small tools, but it isn’t clear from the store layout where I might find what I’m looking for. The store can’t seem to make up its mind where any particular tool might be found. Is it with the screws and fixings? The doorknobs and light switches? The paintbrushes and wallpaper? There seems to be no logic to the layout.

After a few minutes, I see someone in a store uniform.

Me: “Hi. Do you know where I’d find a spirit level?”

Employee #1: “Oh, we have those. They’re in the tool section.”

He gestures wildly at pretty much the entire shop.

Me: “Can you give me a rough idea? I can’t see a specific section for small tools.”

Employee #1: “Oh, we definitely have those. They’re around here somewhere.” 

He gestures expansively again, although with slightly less enthusiasm.

Me: “Right, thanks.”

I go in search of someone else and notice a guy helping a couple with some paint. He seems to know what he’s talking about, so I pretend to be idly browsing paint samples on the end cap until he’s finished, and then I approach him.

Me: “Hi. I wonder if you can help me. I’m looking for a spirit level, but I can’t seem to find the right section.”

Employee #2: “A what, sorry?”

Me: “A spirit level. You know, for making sure you’ve got things straight? Horizontally? I’m laying some paving slabs.”

Employee #2: “Oh, I don’t think we have rulers.”

Me: “Not a ruler. It has markings on it like a ruler, but it has a bubble in it? You know, like this?” 

I try to demonstrate what a spirit level would look like. 

Me: “You’d lay it on something you were trying to get even and the position of the bubble would tell you if it was horizontally true or not?”

Employee #2: “Oh, we probably have those. They’d be in our tool section.” *Gestures wildly*

Me: “Right, thank you.”

I decide I’ll have one more go. Two aisles over, I find an employee labelling drills. 

Me: “Hi. I’m looking for a spirit level. Any idea where I might find one?”

Employee #3: “Sorry, a what? What are you looking for?”

Me: “A spirit level? I’m laying some paving slabs.”

Employee #3: “You’re doing a patio?”

Me: “Not a patio, just some slabs I’m trying to get even.”

Employee #3: “Right, you want one of our patio experts.” *Hollers loudly* “Greg!”

Greg appears from the next aisle and turns out to be the first guy I spoke to.

Employee #3: “This lady wants some help laying her patio.”

Me: *Cheerily* “Don’t worry about it. Thanks for your help!”

As I was leaving, I noticed a spirit level on a small end cap of sale items and bought it. The slabs turned out handsome.

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Unfiltered Story #208844

, , , | Unfiltered | September 22, 2020

I work in a showroom that sells bathroom fixtures and accessories, we have people come in that are planning on a remodel, or building a new home and want to check out the products. I get so many stupid questions:
Customer #1 – “so when you say 60″ in length, is that how long it is?”
Customer #2 – “what is the difference between left and right hand drain?”, Me: “that is the side that the drain and plumbing is on”, Customer: “how do I know which side I need”
Customer #3 – “I’m looking for a 5 foot vanity”, me: yes, here are our 60″ vanities” customer: I don’t think you understand I want 5 feet. me: “yes, 5 feet and 60 inches are the same measurement” Customer: “no they’re not, everyone know feet are bigger than inches!”