He’s Not Clowning Around

| Friendly | November 15, 2016

(I am a bisexual male, going through a theme park full of haunted attractions and having a blast. Our group is going through a circus-themed attraction and at one point we’re lined up with a bunch of scary clowns between us. I am to one clown’s left and a girl I don’t know is to his right.)

Clown: *laughing at her* “WANNA KISS?!”

Girl: “No, not really!”

Me: “I do!”

Clown: *leans in close to my face* “REEEEALLY?!”

Me: *I pucker my lips and am just about to kiss his nose*

Clown: *recoils* “Ehhg, I’m not into that!”

Me: “Aww…”

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Requires An Explanation In Black And White

| Friendly | November 14, 2016

(I am going through a sanitarium-style horror attraction. I have nobody to go with so I tag along with a family who are black, while I am white. They only have a small six-year-old with them.)

Woman: “This looks scary as all h***.”

Me: “Yeah, I’m not tagging along for my sake; I’m doing it for yours.”

Woman: “That’s completely fine. It’s like you’re our second son!”

Man: “You got some explaining to do, [Woman]!”

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