Find Pink Swimsuit Girl And Do A “Powerpuff Girl” Cosplay?

, , , | Friendly | April 22, 2020

After fifth grade, I switch to a new sixth- to twelfth-grade school. This school doesn’t have an associated elementary, so it takes students from many different schools. That means most of us know few to none of our new classmates.

In the summer before we start, the school arranges pool parties so the students can get to know each other. Students are assigned alphabetically to a party. My portion of the alphabet happens to be overwhelmingly male — there are five girls and about twenty-five boys at the party.

Of course, we’re at an age where boys and girls avoid each other because of “cooties,” so I can’t hang out with any of the boys. Three of the girls are giggling over a teen magazine, which I have no interest in, and the other girl is in the pool. The two of us spend the whole party swimming together and get along great. We promise that we’ll be great friends come September.

After leaving the party, I realize something: I don’t know her name. We had name tags, but we didn’t wear them in the pool. And since we were supposed to be wearing name tags, we never introduced ourselves. With no other option, I decide I’ll just have to remember her face.

That, of course, doesn’t happen. The pool party is at the beginning of the summer, and by the time school starts, the only thing I remember about the girl is that she was wearing a green swimsuit.

Our lockers are also assigned alphabetically, so I look around on the first day of school to try to find Green Swimsuit Girl. I strike up a quick friendship with the girl whose locker is next to mine, and for a while, I suspect she might be the Green Swimsuit Girl. However, she never mentions the pool party, so I assume it’s not her. By the end of the first week, I still haven’t found her. I assume at that point that she switched schools.

Years pass, and my locker buddy becomes my best friend. Other friends come and go, but we always stay together. Before we know it, we’re about to graduate high school. [BFF] and I are planning a trip to an amusement park after graduation, and another friend has asked to come along. Once we’ve figured out what day we can borrow [BFF]’s parents’ car, we go to tell [Friend] the details.

BFF: “Hey, [Friend]! We figured out when we’re going to [Amusement Park]. It’s [date].”

Friend: “Hold on.” *Checks calendar* “Aw, I can’t come! My mom’s making me help out with [Little Brother]’s party that day.

Me: “Didn’t he just have his birthday party last week?”

Friends: “Yeah, it’s not for his birthday. It’s one of the sixth-grade pool parties. Remember those?”

BFF: “Oh, yeah! You know, I met a girl at mine who I swore was going to be my best friend, but then I forgot her face and name. I never figured out who she was because all I remembered about her was that she was wearing a blue swimsuit. I did think it was [My Name] for a bit, but obviously, it wasn’t.”

Me: “Wait a second! You’re Green Swimsuit Girl?!”

BFF: “You’re Blue Swimsuit Girl?!”

Me: “Why didn’t you say anything?”

BFF: “I was waiting for you to say something!”

Me: “So was I!”

Friend: “Oh, my God, guys, really? This is so you.”

It turned out we’d both forgotten each other’s faces and were waiting for the other to give a sign first. At least we can say that we picked each other as best friends twice over! And as for the amusement park trip, we moved it to another day and both helped [Friend] out with her little brother’s party.

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Reflect On Rejection Of Rectory Reflections

, , , , , | Learning | April 20, 2020

I go to a private Catholic high school; however, there aren’t really any non-religious private schools in the area so a decent amount of the students, myself included, are just there for the education and couldn’t care less about the religious aspects of the school.

Every year during Lent, my school sends out daily Lenten reflections through our email. During my senior year, these emails come up in conversation in one of my classes.

Teacher: “Oh! Did y’all read the Lenten reflection yesterday? I thought it was so good.”

Friend: *Laughing* “No, I just delete those as soon as I see them in my inbox.”

Almost all of my classmates nod their heads in agreement with my friend. The teacher genuinely looks bewildered.

Teacher: “Wha— What? Why not?! They’re always so sweet.”

Half The Class: “I’m not religious.”

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You Need Saintlike Patience For These Priests

, , , , , , | Learning | April 17, 2020

This takes place in the nineties when I am attending Catholic School. A few other students and I are discussing “Sunday Obligation” — the fact that it’s a mortal sin to choose to skip Mass on Sundays — with one of the priests that teaches there. Catholics are allowed to attend Saturday Night Vigil Mass and it counts for one’s Sunday Obligation. 

Me: “My family usually goes to the Saturday evening Mass at [Church] because my mom often works on Sundays.”

Priest: *All high and mighty* “What kind of a place would make a Catholic Christian mother work on a Sunday? The Lord’s day?!”

Me:Saint [Name]’s Hospital. She’s an emergency room nurse.” 

Priest: “…”

That shut him up.

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NOBODY Wants To Share That Experience

, , , , , | Learning | April 11, 2020

My high school doesn’t have a nurse’s office and it NEVER stocks pads or tampons in the girls’ bathrooms. As I have a very heavy cycle that’s impossible to track, I always carry pads, tampons, and painkillers on me in a gaudy blue- and yellow-striped bag in my purse. In sociology class, which has a male teacher, I hear a girl behind me whisper to her friend.

Girl #1: “Do you have anything? I think my period just started.”

Girl #2: “No, sorry.”

I hold out my bag.

Me: “Hey. Take what you need.”

Girl #1: “Thank you so—”

Teacher: “[My Name]! What are you doing?”

Me: “Just giving someone something, sorry—”

Teacher: *Yelling* “You’re supposed to be studying! What are you handing out that’s so important that you decided to disobey me? I ought to fail you on the quiz we’re having tomorrow. What are you giving out? Did you bring enough for everyone or just your friends?! I never have problems out of you! You don’t even talk to people and now you’re sharing things with the class? What are you even doing with that ugly bag in my classroom in the first place?!”

Me: “Mr. [Teacher], if that’s important to you, I’ll let you have one, too. Do you need a tampon or a pad?”

The teacher goes pale and then bright red.

Teacher: “Oh. Never mind.”

My younger sister says he’s the principal now, and the bathrooms always have hygiene products in them. Still no nurse, though.

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Ahora, El Gato En El Sombrero Puede Leer Por Sí Mismo

, , , , , , | Learning | April 10, 2020

When I was in Spanish 3, one of our assignments was to translate a children’s book from English into Spanish. She suggested we get a book that’s a beginning reader level. My teacher’s only rule was we couldn’t use a Dr. Seuss book because the rhyming structure and the made-up words would be too difficult to translate. This was an in-class assignment we would be doing all the next week.

I will say, I was not a fan of this teacher. There were times I felt like she singled me out. I didn’t like her teaching style, and her personality clashed with mine. She also kept calling me a name that wasn’t my name, and I insisted she call me by my name, and that didn’t help things. I feel like the only reason she didn’t give me a harder time was that I was quiet, I did my work on time, I got mostly As and Bs, and I actually paid attention in class.

I went home and looked through my old children’s books and settled on a book about a bunny who had an identity crisis. It wasn’t written by Dr. Seuss and it was a beginner reader level, so I thought I was good to go.

The next time I had class, I brought in the book so I could do the assignment. I placed the book on my desk and, while I was getting paper out, one of my classmates saw the book on my desk and said, way too loud, “You’re not supposed to have a Dr. Seuss book!”

On the top right corner of the cover was a small picture of the Cat in the Hat with a seal that said, “Beginner Books: I can read all by myself!” The back cover of the book had some information about the Beginner Books, as well as a bigger picture of the Cat in the Hat. 

Beginner Books was created by Dr. Seuss, and most — if not all — Dr. Seuss books are Beginner Books, but not all Beginner Books are Dr. Seuss books. All it means is that it’s easy to read.

I tried to explain this to my teacher and I pointed out the extremely feminine author’s name, but my teacher refused to listen and made me pick another book.

A different classmate had brought in three or four books in case someone else couldn’t find a book to use, and she offered to let me use one for the assignment. I agreed, only because my teacher wouldn’t give me an extension and I would be wasting classtime doing nothing otherwise. 

I ended up with a B on the assignment. I still feel like if it had been anybody else, she would’ve let them translate the original book. This teacher was the reason I gave up studying Spanish and switched to Latin for my last two years of high school and took ASL in college.

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