Pimento No No

, , , , , , , | Working | July 13, 2018

(This takes place at an Italian restaurant. I almost never eat at Italian restaurants as I have a LOT of food allergies, including tomatoes and peppers.)

Me: “Does the chicken and vegetable soup have peppers in it?”

Waitress: “No. There shouldn’t be. I’ll check with the chef just in case.” *leaves and comes back* “No, there aren’t any peppers. You’re good.”

Me: “Perfect. Then I’ll have that.”

(The waitress comes back with the soup and puts it in front of me. At this point, I check my soup. I always check everything, just in case, and this turns out to have something red in it… a pepper.)

Me: “Excuse me. This has peppers in it.”

Waitress: “Oh, no! Let me see that. I’ll go ask the chef immediately!” *returns five minutes later* “You can eat it. That wasn’t a pepper. It was a pimento. It’s the thing from inside the olive, you know. So you can totally have it!”

Me: “The other half of the word is ‘pepper.’”

Their Brain Is In Another Box

, , , , , | Healthy | July 11, 2018

I work at a medical courier company. Basically, I go to different hospitals and pick up and drop off blood and urine samples because different hospitals are equipped to do different kinds of tests. There are some cases where the samples have to be sent on a plane because only a couple hospitals in the country do those certain tests. I go to the airport, where I drop off the box of samples. The box is big and clearly marked, “Biohazard,” and there are some stickers that say, “Biological Substances.”

I’m in line, and a woman comes up to me, looks me straight in the face, and asks, “So, is that like… arms and legs?” I just looked at her for a good 15 seconds before saying, “No.”

Gluten Out Of Ten For Ignorance, Part 4

, , , , , , | Working | July 11, 2018

(I have Celiac’s, so I eat a gluten-free diet. I recently learned that a nearby restaurant serves gluten-free toast, so my husband and I decide to go for breakfast and try it out.)

Me: “I’ll have the [meal] with gluten-free toast, please.”

Server: “Oh, I don’t think we do that anymore. I’ll just bring you the pancakes.”

Me: “[Restaurant] has gluten-free pancakes now, too?”

Server: “Yep! Well, whole wheat, so it’s pretty much the same thing.”

(We stared at her for a few seconds before politely asking to speak to someone else. The next server took my order and brought my toast with no problems at all.)

Gluten Out Of Ten For Ignorance, Part 3
Gluten Out Of Ten For Ignorance, Part 2
Gluten Out Of Ten For Ignorance

Sounds Like Their Brain Is Oxygen Starved

, , , , , | Right | July 11, 2018

(I am the manager of a 144-unit apartment complex. One of my long-term — ten years plus — residents, confides in me that his elderly uncle, whom he lives with, hid from him that he has bedbugs in his room. Very soon thereafter, I have my professional exterminator go into his apartment to do a thorough inspection. Yes, indeed, he has bed bugs. The exterminator and I then call the resident to report the findings and to discuss the treatment plan. The exterminator is telling the resident how to prepare for treatment, and he asks the resident:)

Exterminator: “Does anyone living in your home have any respiratory problems?”

Resident: “No, but my mother can’t go anywhere without her oxygen tank.”

Exterminator: “She will have to be out of your home at least overnight, and not just the normal four hours.”

(Later on that same day, the resident comes into my office to pick up the “preparation list” of what to do. As he’s reading it over, he says to me:)

Resident: “About my mother, it says we only have to be gone for four hours?”

(I stare at him for a puzzled moment, and then I remind him that the exterminator asked him is anyone in his family had respiratory problems. He looks frustrated and repeats to me:)

Resident: “No, she just can’t go anywhere without her oxygen tank!”

(I stayed calm, did not laugh, and told this 47-year-old man, father of two, that the reason his mother has an oxygen tank in the first place is because of respiratory problems.)

Blind Assumption

, , , , , | Right | July 10, 2018

(I have a somewhat short haircut that falls mostly to my left side, which has a tendency to cover my left eye, especially when my hands are full and I can’t fix it. I keep this particular style because my eye is a bit lazy and I like to cover it up.)

Customer: *seemingly rather annoyed and in a rude tone* “How can you stand your hair blocking your eye like that? It would drive me insane!”

Me: *taken aback by his tone* “Well… Um… I’m actually mostly blind in that eye, so I don’t really see much out of it, anyway.”

Customer: “Oh.” *obviously seeing the mistake in his assumption, quickly grabs his change and items and runs off*

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