Quite A Climb To Get To The Answer

| Boston, MA, USA | Extra Stupid, Theme Of The Month

(I work at a climbing gym. We were closed for a week to do yearly renovations.)

Customer: *walks up, pulls on locked door*

Customer: *looks inside, sees climbing walls being painted*

Customer: *looks at sign on door, which explains reason for closure*

Customer: *looks inside again*

Customer: *pulls out cell phone, calls our landline*

Customer: “Hey, are you guys open?”

Bad Things Come To Those Who Wait

| Saskatoon, SK, Canada | Crazy Requests

(Our facility offers a cultural swim for women who don’t swim with men. We are the only facility in the city that offers this. We only have 12 spots for adults and it usually fills a month ahead. This call takes place one week before.)

Me: “Hello, [Gym]. [My Name] speaking.”

Caller: “Do you still offer cultural swim?”

Me: “Yes, we do, but I’m sorry. It is full for this session.”

(Caller hangs up abruptly. Less than two minutes later, the same number appears on my phone.)

Me: “Hello, [Gym].  [My Name] speaking.”

Caller: “I am wondering when your cultural swim starts.”

Me: “Are you already registered?”

Caller: “No.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but our adult class is full. We do have one spot left in our six and under class.”

Caller: “Already? Can’t you fit one more in?”

Me: “I’m sorry, the class has been full for a month. I can put you on our wait list.”

Caller: “Can’t you add one more?”

Me: “No, I’m sorry. It’s a pre-programmed system and once a class is full, registration locks.”

Caller: “Can’t you override it?”

Me: *getting a little annoyed* “I’m sorry. That’s not how our system works.”

Caller: “Why can’t the manager override it?”

(This continues three or four more times.)

Me: “I’m sorry but as I’ve explained the class is full and registration is locked. I can put you on a wait list, or you can try registering in the fall.”

Caller: “Well, I guess put me on a wait list. There is still a week. Someone will probably drop out.”

Me: *takes breath* “Okay, I can put you on a wait list—”

Caller: “So, you’ll call me when someone drops out?”

Me: “Well, there are four names ahead of you.”

Caller: “There’s still a week. People will drop out.”

(Because this class is so in demand people rarely drop out. I put her on the wait list anyway.)

Caller: “Call me when there’s a spot for me.” *hangs up*

Didn’t Quite Hit The Nail On The Head

| IN, USA | Bizarre, Family & Kids

(I’m working in the child-watch section of the gym, where people leave their kids while they go work out. Normally it’s not too bad, but today it is just me and one other person and we have three kids less than a year old in addition to other kids. After a while, I finally manage to get two of them to sleep and some of the older kids come over to watch them.)

Girl: “Her nails are so little and cute. We’d need just a drop of nail polish to color them. Can we paint her nails?”

(I am stunned so I blurt the first thing that comes to mind.)

Me: “No modifications made to the baby without her parent present.”

Girl: “Huh?”

Me: “No, you can’t paint her nails.”