Searched Pole To Pole

| IL, USA | Right | October 15, 2015

(I am working at the front desk at a local grocery store when a woman who is known for being difficult walks in. I say ‘good morning’ to her only to be ignored. I go back to what I was doing and about a minute later the woman is back at the front desk banging her hand on the counter.)

Me: “How can I help you, ma’am?”

Woman: “Where are your dried tomatoes? I have spent over twenty minutes looking all over this store and can’t find them!”

Me: “They are very easy to find. Go to aisle three, look for the big support pole in the middle of the isle, they are right across from the red fire extinguisher.”

Woman: “Come show me; I’ve looked EVERYWHERE in this store.”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, I am alone here right now. My coworker is on break. Let me find one of the stockers to help.”

Woman: “Never mind! I’ll find them myself…. Aisle three?”

Me: “Right, aisle three; look for the support pole.”

(She disappears for a couple of minutes, but returns empty handed and starts banging her hand on the counter again.)

Woman: “I looked EVERYWHERE and couldn’t find them! You should be ashamed you don’t know your store better!”

(By this time my coworker returned from break.)

Me: “Let me show you where they are, ma’am.”

(We walk to aisle three.)

Me: *I point up* “Aisle three.” *point to the fire extinguisher* “Red fire extinguisher on the big support pole.” *and point to the dried tomatoes* “Take your pick, ma’am.”

Woman: “This pole wasn’t here a minute ago!”

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Use Them To Get The Breast Stuff

| SC, USA | Romantic | October 13, 2015

(I am at the self check-out.)

Boyfriend: *looks at me* “Your boobs look really great in that shirt.”

Me: “Really?”

Boyfriend: “Yeah, you should show them off more”

Me: “But I’m dating you…”

Boyfriend: “I don’t care. Use them to get stuff. Use them to get me stuff.”

Closed Down Compassion

| OR, USA | Right | October 12, 2015

(I work at a grocery store that was bought out by an out of state chain. After only three months, they decide to close almost half of the newly acquired stores. Everyone at my store is on edge and very emotional.)

Customer: “How dare you!”

Coworker: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “How dare you close this store? It’s the only one downtown; I won’t be able to shop.”

Coworker: “Ma’am, everyone that works here is upset about the situation. We had nothing to do with the—”

Customer: *interrupting* “I don’t care. You can’t close the store. Where will I shop?”

(My coworker starts sobbing.)

Me: *stepping in* “Listen. The employees here had nothing to do with this. The store managers had nothing to do with this. WE. ARE. ALL. LOSING. OUR. JOBS! I’m sure you’ll recover from the great inconvenience of having to drive an extra mile and a half, but everyone here is facing unemployment. Please consider that, and have a nice day.”

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I’ll Beatle You To It

| USA | Working | October 10, 2015

(I am on vacation with my family and in the eighth grade, wearing a Beatles T-shirt. As we are buying food for lunch at a grocery store, the cashier notices my shirt and starts quizzing me as he’s checking out our food.)

Cashier: “What was their original name?”

Me: “The Quarrymen.”

Cashier: “What’s Ringo’s real name?”

Me: “Richard Starkey.”

Cashier: “Who was the original drummer?”

Me: “Pete Best.”

Cashier: “Who was the original bassist?”

Me: “Stu Sutcliffe.”

Cashier: “Who was their manager?”

Me: “Brian Epstein.”

Cashier: “What label did they work under?”

Me: “Apple.”

Cashier: “Who was their sound manager?”

Me: “George Martin.”

Cashier: “Who died first?”

Me: “John.”

Cashier: “Who died second?”

Me: “George.”

(He seemed pretty happy to know I knew all those facts.)

Children Of The Corn Syrup

| Berkeley, CA, USA | Working | October 9, 2015

(I overhear this between an employee restocking shelves and a nearby customer who is taking a long time looking at different products. The customer has a child sitting in the cart who can’t be older than three or four.)

Employee: “Do you need help finding anything?”

Customer: “No, I’m fine, thanks; just looking here.”

(Customer takes an item from the shelf.)

Customer’s Child: “Mommy, does that have any high fructose corn syrup in it?”

Customer: “Let’s check, [Child].”

(They start reading through the ingredients together.)

Employee: “All right, then…”

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