(I’m waiting in line. The customer in front of me has two unruly boys.)

Boy #1: *to his brother* “Is this for us?”

Boy #2: “I think so!”

(They proceed to stuff candy from the shelves into their pockets.)

Cashier: “I’m sorry; you need to pay for those.”

Boy #1: “Poop!”

Boy #2: “Don’t say that. It’s a dirty word.”

(They empty their pockets.)

Boy #1: “What if I just take one?”

Cashier: “You still have to pay for it.”

Boy #1: “Poop!”

(He pulls an orange from his mother’s shopping cart. He throws it at the cashier, who catches it without looking up.)

Boy #2: “How did you do that?!”

Cashier: “Oh, all the staff here are ninjas.”

(Panicked, the boys take a few more pieces of candy out of their pockets. As he starts ringing me up, I hear him muttering to himself.)

Cashier: “Don’t play baseball, they tell me; it’s a waste of time. Just get a job, they say! That’ll teach you what’s important.”

(I’m working at the self-checkout area. I watch over the customers, and help them if they seem lost. One customer has a bunch of green onions, and is looking for them in the ‘No Barcode’ area, under ‘G’. This is a common mistake, so I go to help.)

Me: “‘O’, ma’am.”

Customer: “Oh, what?”

Me: “No, ‘O’. It’s under ‘O’.”

Customer: “It’s under oh what? What’s it under?”

Me: “‘O’.”

Customer: “Oh, what? What’s it under?”

(I walk over to her and tap the ‘O’ button.)

Me: “No, it’s under ‘O’. ‘O’ for onion.”

Customer: “Oh. Oh, ‘O’!”

Me: “Yeah, ‘O’.”

Customer: “Oh, okay!”

(A customer comes up with two packages of[energy drink].)

Customer: “Is this sugar free?”

Me: “Nope, afraid not. The sugar free usually has a lighter coloring on the box.”

(The customer repeats his question twice more, and I repeat my answer twice more. Finally, he decides to buy the two packages of normal [energy drink].)

Me: “All right, here’s your receipt!”

Customer: “Wait here. I’ll go get the sugar free…”

(Puzzled, I keep an eye on his groceries. When he returns, he takes the normal [energy drink] out of the bag, putting the new packages in the bag.)

Me: “Sir, didn’t you want to purchase those, too?”

Customer: “No! I told you, I was going to get sugar free! You rang me up for them!”

Me: “Sir, I told you three times that you were buying the regular kind. If you want those instead, you’re going to have to do an exchange.”

Customer: “No! I told you! I wanted sugar free! I have no time for this!”

(I call over my supervisor.)

Supervisor: “What’s up?”

(I explain the situation, calling it a slight problem in communication.)

Customer: “I told her; I’m very busy! I have no time for this!”

Supervisor: “Sir, in the time it took me to walk over here, you could’ve had this done and been on your way. I’ll take care of this on another register.”

(Without a word further, my supervisor takes the customer’s groceries and brings them to another register. A regular customer is behind the other customer, and has witnessed the whole thing.)

Regular Customer: “Geez! People sure are awful, huh?”

(I have been in a wheelchair since age three. Despite this, I can push my own cart just fine while wheeling myself around. A customer in the store notices me.)

Customer: “Ma’am, do you need help? One of my kids can help you push your cart.”

Me: “No, thank you; I am doing just fine.”

Customer: “But you’re disabled! You can’t do anything on your own!”

(The customer tries to grab the cart. I hold onto it.)

Me: “I can do it just fine on my own, thank you!”

Customer: “See, that’s the problem these days! You people not accepting help!”

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Me: “No bag for me, thanks.”

Bagger: “But how will you carry these?”

Me: “I’ll just put them in my purse.”

Bagger: “But it will look like you are stealing.”

Me: “Well I will have my receipt, should anyone question me.”

Bagger: “It looks like you are stealing, and I hope you get searched on the way out.”

Me: “Okay…”

Bagger: *mutters* “It looks like she’s stealing. She should get searched…”