(My husband and I are shopping at a grocery store bakery, and we decide to pick up a cake. There’s a really nice-looking layer cake decorated with whole strawberries, but on closer inspection we see mold on most of the berries. We decide to pick it up and bring it to the counter to let them know.)

Me: “Hey, I just thought you should know this cake has mold on it; you might want to take it off the display so no one buys it.”

Bakery Employee: *looks at the cake* “The ‘best before’ date is not for another three days; it’s fine.”

Me: “Oh, but did you look at the top? There’s mold all over the strawberries.”

Bakery Employee: “Well, the cake’s not expired, so it has to go back on the shelf.”

Husband: “But it’s covered in mold; it really isn’t good for anyone to eat that.”

Bakery Employee: “Well, don’t buy it, then. We’ll take it off the shelf in three days when it’s expired.”

Me: “Why would you leave it on the shelf? What if someone else doesn’t see the mold and buys it? You need to take this to the back and throw it out.” *we hand her the cake and walk away*

Bakery Employee: *calling out after us* “But it’s not expired yet!”

(I work at the customer service desk for a very large grocery and retail store. It has been a busy day full of customers, and it has finally slowed down. Then, I have a woman approach the customer service desk wanting to make a return.)

Customer: “I need to return this; it’s no good.”

Me: “Okay, may I see your receipt? Let’s have a look at the return.”

(I open up the bag with the return. It’s the remnants of a pound of individually-packaged cheese slices.)

Me: “All right… What seems to be the problem?”

Customer: “I can’t get any of it to melt; this cheese is non-meltable!”

(I work at the bakery in a somewhat upscale grocery store. We, annoyingly, allow customers to try a “sample” of nearly anything if they ask. When we get new product, we always cut up samples and put them out. We’ve recently started making four new breads, so we put out four paper bags with the cut-up bread and a sign stating what each bread is, its ingredients, and its allergy information. Two young boys walk up with their father.)

Father: “I’m looking for the best bread to make garlic bread with.”

(His kids start eating samples, and I help the father pick out bread. They leave, and a few minutes later the father returns, looking angry.)

Father: “Which one was it?”

(The younger of the two kids points to a bag.)

Father: “[Bread]? Which one is the [Bread]?”

Me: “This one.” *I hold up the bread*

Father: “Are those sesame seeds?!”

Me: “Yes. But it is the same bread as this one.” *picks up different bread* “It just has sesame seeds on top.”

Father: “My son is allergic to sesame seeds!”

Me: “Oh. So, do you—”

Father: *interrupts* “How could you let him eat this?! You should warn people with allergies!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir. The allergy information is posted right here—” *gestures to the sign* “—on top of the bag.

Father: “My son can’t read!”

Me: “Well, then, as the father of a son with allergies who is too young to be able to read, shouldn’t you be paying more attention to what he is putting into his mouth?”

Father: *glares and storms off*

This story is part of our Food Allergies roundup!

Read the next Food Allergies roundup story!

Read the Food Allergies roundup!

(A grandma and her little grandson have just picked out a cupcake decorated to look like a sundae for him, and I ask if today is special. It turns out the little boy fell at school and has a minor injury on his head. Feeling bad, I go for the free cookies the store gives out to children.)

Me: “I know something that might make that feel better. Would you like a cookie?”

Boy: “No.”

Grandma & Me: “No?”

Boy: “Maybe tomorrow.”

Grandma: “Maybe tomorrow?”

(We both laughed, and I waved goodbye as the little boy clutched his packaged cupcake. I hope the little cutie feels better!)

(An elderly customer comes up to the service desk with a light bulb in his hand. It’s one of those new, long-lasting, compact fluorescent bulbs.)

Customer: “I need to return this.”

Me: “Okay. Was there something wrong with it?”

Customer: “No, but it says that it lasts for 14 years. I’m not going to live that long!”