(I am working as a cashier at a local grocery store. We have a special that runs Monday and Tuesday where you can get milk for $1.99. A big sign on the outside of our building that you see when you walk in states this. I am ringing up an older man on a Wednesday afternoon when his milk rings up at $2.49.)

Customer: “Hold it. That was wrong. Your sign outside clearly states the milk is $1.99.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, that is the Monday and Tuesday special; it’s the regular price the rest of the week.”

Customer: *getting agitated* “It says right on the sign outside, ‘$1.99.’ It doesn’t state any specific days.”

Me: “Again, the sign says, ‘Monday and Tuesday only,’ sir—“

Customer: *red-faced and practically yelling* “Do I have to take you outside and show you?”

Me: *turning to the supervisor* “Mind if I go on a field trip?”

Supervisor: *smiling, hearing what’s been said* “Go right ahead.”

Customer: “It’s a shame you don’t know your own store’s promotions! And that a customer has to teach you!”

(We walk outside and go to where the sign is. I point to the big print that states, “MONDAY and TUESDAY SPECIALS.”)

Customer: “Well… I… Well…”

Me: “I can see if the manager will offer it today…”

Customer: *defeated* “No, no, no. I read the sign wrong. You don’t need to do that for a cantankerous old man. Maybe someday I will learn how to read.”

(We both shared a laugh and went back inside. He was pleasant for the rest of the transaction and then he went on his way. I was just happy — and a little shocked — that a customer actually admitted he was wrong.)

Customer: “Excuse me. Could you show me where your lemons are?”

Me: “Of course.”

(I show her and she thanks me graciously. When she is finished shopping I am working on the registers. Remembering me, she decides to get in my line.)

Customer: “Thank you so much for earlier. I do love lemons!”

(She then unloaded her trolley. She had five crates of apples and not a lemon in sight. She paid and left happy. The apples aren’t even on the same aisle.)

(I work in one of those wholesale clubs that give out free samples to customers while they shop. Our standard hours for samples are from 10:30 am to 5:00 pm and anybody who shops here knows this. This customer is a regular, and we all dread seeing him. Today he rolls up in his little, motorized shopping cart as I am cleaning up my cart at 4:50. We should all be gone by 5:00.)

Customer: “What’s this? It’s dinner time; where are you going?”

Me: “Sorry, sir, we’re done for the day.”

Customer: “Well, that’s just not fair. Don’t you have any more samples in your cart?”

Me: “Nope, sorry, sir.”

Customer: “That’s just bad business. You guys are here to serve food while we shop; why would you leave at dinner time?”

(He is still going on about how we should be working until 8:00 when everybody would be done eating, and I am silently losing my cool. But I sigh and explain to him the well-known company policy that we only work weekends during the day so parents can bring their children shopping with them.)

Customer: “But what about us that work during the day?”

Me: “We work during the day, too. Many people come in to shop during their lunch break and snack around the store.”

Customer: “Well, my work is too important for me to just leave.”

(Might I mention, this is the same customer who boasts about being retired and spending his days playing golf and living off his military pension. After him yelling at me some more, he said he was going to write to the company saying that we should work until after “dinner time” so he could get his samples after the country club closes. He was regaling my coworker a few aisles away about this as I pushed my cart to the warehouse section, and she was doing all she could to be polite until he was done. In our office, she told me that I could have at least warned her.)

(I am consistently one of the fastest cashiers, as the store tracks our scanning speeds. During a very busy Sunday afternoon the lines at the registers are long and I am checking customers out very quickly to try and get the lines down. A customer waiting in my line gets my attention.)

Customer #1: “Excuse me!  EXCUSE ME?!”

Me: *as I am quickly working on scanning the current customer’s groceries* “Yes, ma’am?”

Customer #1: “Can you hurry up?! I am in a rush here!”

Me: “Yes, ma’am! I am going as quickly as I can. I will be with you in just a moment.”

(I finish up with the customers in front of her and now it is her turn.)

Customer #1: *very rudely* “Make it quick, I have to get going!”

Me: “Yes, ma’am.” *I scan her groceries as fast as I possibly can while she stands there watching me* “Okay, ma’am, your total today is [total].”

(At this point she sets her purse up on the counter and begins searching through it. Eventually she pulls out her checkbook and begins to write a check. She could have been filling out the check while I was scanning and bagging her groceries if she was in such a hurry. At this point her groceries are all bagged and ready and we are waiting on her as she SLOWLY fills out her personal check. It takes her longer to write the check than it took me to scan and bag her entire order. Finally she hands me the check.)

Me: *I process the payment; it goes through* “Thank you, ma’am. You have a good day!”

(As the lines are still long I immediately begin scanning the next customer’s groceries. The customer who was in a rush is still standing in the same location now writing in her checkbook, I assume balancing it. She takes so long to do so I have now scanned, bagged, and finished checking out the customer behind her. However, as it is busy and the registers are very close together, [Customer #2] is now waiting on the first customer to move out of the way so she can get her items and leave. I begin scanning yet the next customer’s groceries. As I am scanning….)

Customer #2: *patiently waits a few moments but clearly wants to get by [Customer #1] and leave* “Excuse me?”

Customer #1: *ignores her, continues to write in her checkbook*

([Customer #2] waits a few more moments and is getting more impatient to get by and leave. By this time I am just about done with [Customer #3].)

Customer #2: “EXCUSE ME?!”

Customer #1: *finally looks up* “WHAT?!”

Customer #2: “Can you move out of the way so we can get by?!”

Customer #1: *very angry and flustered* “FINE! Why is everyone always in such a d*** rush?!”

([Customer #3] and I looked at each other and started laughing as he had seen and heard all of this too. [Customer #1] gave us dirty looks and finally left, allowing [Customer #2] to get by.)

(I’m at the supermarket to get some eggs. I pick a box and, like always, I check the eggs. I notice an egg with a crack. I don’t want to be “that customer” who just puts the egg back and takes another carton, so I decide to hand it in to an employee. Luckily, he is right next to me.)

Me: “Excuse me, but this egg is broken.”

Employee: “Oh, I’m sorry. Let me take that egg from you. You can pick an egg from one of the other cartons.”

(He walked away and I turned to the rack of eggs again. It then dawned on me that by picking an egg from another carton, I would have a complete set… but another carton would be incomplete! Instead, I picked another complete carton, checked the eggs, and left the incomplete carton — with the lid open — near the employee’s cart with stock. I don’t know what his train of thought was, but at least he was — trying to be — helpful!)