Doesn’t Have It In The Bag

| North Vancouver, BC, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre

(I’m working as a cashier at a popular grocery store. A woman comes in my line with a shopping cart full of typical grocery items.)

Me: “Hi, there. How are you doing today?”

Customer: “I’m okay. I forgot my (reusable) bags at my house, though.”

Me: “That’s okay; it happens to us all.”

(The first thing on the belt is three 4-litre jugs of milk.)

Me: “Do you want bags for the milk?”

Customer: “Yes, please. And could you double bag it?”

(Next are a few things of meat products.)

Me: “Did you want the meat all in one bag?”

Customer: “No. I need the bacon in its own bag. And could you also separate the meat and seafood?”

Me: “Sure.”

(This keeps going throughout the transaction, wanting bread in one bag, the produce broken up into numerous bags, cleaning products in smaller bags before being put into bigger bags, and most of these being double bagged. At the end, there is a bag of chips left on the belt.)

Me: “Did you want this in its own bag?”

Customer: “Oh, no, thanks. I’m trying to cut down on the number of plastic bags.”

(I ended up using more bags than she had groceries.)

That’s No Way To Talk To A Customer

| CA, USA | At The Checkout, Health & Body, Top

(I’m the customer in this story. I’m checking out at a grocery store and the cashier has a sign out that reads ‘I’ve lost my voice. Please work with me.’)

Cashier: *nods at me by way of greeting; points to the sign*

Me: *nods and give thumbs up to indicate that I saw it*

Cashier: *scans a bottle of wine; pantomimes opening his wallet*

Me: *wordlessly show him my ID*

Cashier: *holds up a bag; raises eyebrow to ask if I want one*

Me: *nods; hold up one finger*

Me: *out loud* “Oh… I guess I can still talk, huh?”

Cashier: *smiles and writes me a quick note on a scrap of paper*

Note: “Don’t feel bad. You’re at least the 10th person today.”

Judged Unworthy To Judge

| NH, USA | At The Checkout, Holidays, Religion

(I am wearing rabbit ears the week before the Easter holiday while I ring groceries.)

Customer: “And do you go to church on Easter?”

Me: “No, I celebrate with baskets, candy, and a nice family meal.”

Customer: “I don’t think Jesus would approve of that.”

Me: “Luckily for me, Jesus wasn’t exactly known to judge people.”

(That shut him up!)